- [MANIACAL LAUGHING]
[DRILL HUMMING]
- IT'S ALIVE!
- [GOBBLING]
CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP
- [GASP]
EEE!
- HA HA HA!
EEE!
- HA HA HA!
I HAVE MILLIONS OF THESE! HA HA HA!
[BEEPING]
- OH, MY GOD! LOOK AT THE TIME!
- THE BAGS! JUST GRAB THE BAGS.
- OH! MY HAT. WHERE IS MY HAT?
- OH, WAIT, WAIT. WAI-WAI-WAIT.
I NEED TO MAKE THIS HAPPEN.
- THERE'S NO TIME. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
NO TIME!
[HORN BLOWS]
OH, NO.
WAIT! NO, PLEASE! WAIT!
- WELL, THAT'S JUST GREAT, STEVE.
MY MOTHER WAS SO RIGHT ABOUT YOU BEING UNRELIABLE.
AND NOW-- NOW LOOK AT WHERE WE ARE!
- WELL, I, UM...UH...
- [PANTING]
ARE WE TOO--WE ARE!
COME ON. IT'S NOT THAT BIG A BOAT.
JUST FLIP IT O--AWW!
WE'RE DOOMED. WE'RE DOOMED.
- AW, GAME OVER, MAN. GAME OVER.
- YOU KNOW WHAT? I'M GONNA BUILD MY OWN ARK.
YEAH, AND IT'S GONNA BE BETTER THAN NOAH'S.
- [ALL TALKING AT ONCE]
- [SNORT]
[THUNDER]
- THIS SUCKS.
- HA HA HA!
YOU GUYS ARE GONNA DROWN.
BUT WE'RE A MERMAID AND A MERMAN.
WE CAN SWIM! HA HA HA!
- [GROWL]
I HOPE YOU CAN ALSO ASEXUALLY REPRODUCE, [BEEP]HOLE.
- CRAP.
- SO YOU TOLD THEM THE WRONG TIME ON PURPOSE?
- YEP. GOD HATES FREAKS.
- THAT DOESN'T SOUND LIKE GOD.
- THAT DOESN'T BLAH BLAH BLAH!
- WELL, THEN, WHY DID YOU LET THE PIXIE FAIRIES ON BOARD?
- I DID?
[THUMPING]
- AAH!
GET BACK HERE, YOU LITTLE DUST TOSSER.
[THUMPING]
[BEEPING]
- HMM!
HA HA!
- [GRUNTING]
- [SNIFFING]
- HA HA HA!
GOH!
- OH!
- KITTY, MY iPOD'S BUSTED.
I'M GONNA PUT MY FOOT RIGHT UP STEVE JOBS' ASS.
- OH, HUSH, RED. I'M BLOGGING.
- IN KOREA, YOU COULD GET A GOOD BLOGGING
FOR 5 AMERICAN DOLLARS.
- [LAUGHTER]
- OH, HONEY. HA HA HA!
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
- KELSO. - FEZ.
I JUST TOOK YOUR PICTURE WITH MY PHONE.
I JUST SENT IT TO YOU.
- OOH, WHAT A SEXY PHOTO.
IT REALLY CAPTURES MY METROSEXUALITY.
- OK. WHO JUST TEXT-MESSAGED ME THAT I'M A DOUCHEBAG?
- [SHOUTS]
- HI. I'M TV's TOPHER GRACE.
AS YOU'VE SEEN TONIGHT,
THE PRECIOUS TRAPPINGS OF OUR MATERIAL-OBSESSED EXISTENCE
BECOME THE SITCOM FODDER OF THE FUTURE.
SO, HEY, PLEASE REMEMBER,
TRY NOT TO BE SUCH A DOUCHEBAG.
THANKS FOR LISTENING.
- BRING OUT YOUR DEAD!
- I'M NOT ABOUT TO DIE FOR A CAUSE I DON'T BELIEVE IN.
- I DON'T--WHAT CAN I TELL YOU?
I MEAN, THIS IS--IT'S BAD!
- OHH. I SURE AM HUNGRY.
THESE CARROTS ARE NOT MINE.
BUT I'M HUNGRY, SO IT'S OK.
YUM, YUM, YUM, YUM, YUM, YUM, YUM.
- WHO'S EATING MY CARROTS?
- OH, DEAR!
- THOSE CARROTS ARE FOR ROBOT THANKSGIVING.
- AAH!
- I SURE AM GLAD I GOT YOU FOR CHRISTMAS
EVEN THOUGH I WASN'T GOOD EVERY SINGLE DAY
AND GOT A SPANKING SOMETIMES WHEN I WAS BAD.
[NEIGH]
- AAH!
- THAT'S COMING FROM THE CAR-- THE CARROT PATCH!
[NEIGH]
- OH, HO, HO! CARROT STEW... AND PRINCESS, TOO.
- I WANT TO BE THE ROBOT!
- I'M THE ROBOT!
- YOU'RE DUMB.
- I WILL SAVE YOU, PRINCESS BRITNEY.
- I WILL FIGHT YOU.
- POW! POW! POW!
- YOU'RE DEAD. YOU'RE DEAD.
- NUH-UH. YOU'RE DEAD.
- [ALL TALKING AT ONCE]
- MY DADDY SAYS "I LOVE YOU" WITH HIS BELT.
- MRS. McNALLY!
MRS. McNALLY, DARRYL MADE A FART.
- POW! POW!
- QUIT IT!
- I NOW PRONOUNCE YOU HUSBAND, RO--WIFE, AND ROBOT,
- [KISSING]
- [GIGGLING]
- THE END.
[FART]
- [LAUGHTER
[ELEPHANT TRUMPETS]
[LION ROARS]
[THUD]
[APPLAUSE]
- I HEAR YOU'RE THE GUYS TO SEE ABOUT ENTERING A RACE.
- NOT JUST ANY RACE.
- [SNICKER]
NO RACE HAS HIGHER STAKES THAN THIS.
- I WANT IN.
- YOU GOT TO PAY IF YOU WANT TO PLAY.
I HAVEN'T MET THE MAN YET
THAT I THINK CAN HANDLE THIS RACE.
- I DON'T SCARE EASY.
- HA HA HA! - HA HA HA!
- [CROWD MURMURING]
[CHEERING]
[ENGINES REVVING]
- LET'S STOW AWAY IN THE MACH 5,
FOR IT GOES SO VERY FAST,
AND WE ALWAYS GREATLY ASSIST SPEED
WHENEVER HE RUNS INTO TROUBLE, WHICH HE ALWAYS DOES, MM-HMM?
- CHIM CHIM.
[SYNTHESIZER MUSIC]
[TIRES SCREECHING]
- BETTER USE THE TURBO BOOST.
- MICHAEL, WAIT.
I CAN ONLY USE MY TURBO BOOST ONCE PER EPISODE.
- WELL, I'M USING IT.
- IT'S IMPORTANT THAT I DO NOT MOVE
BECAUSE IF I WERE TO MOVE, THAT WOULD ADD TO THE COST.
SO IF I STAY PERFECTLY STILL, IT WILL BE PREFERABLE TO MOVING
BECAUSE ANIMATION COSTS MONEY, UH-HUH.
[TIRES SCREECHING]
- GOSH, GOLLY, GEE WILLIKERS, ZIMINY JIPPITY-DO, BATMAN!
THOSE POLICEMEN ARE PRETTY RUDE.
- ROBIN, LAW ENFORCEMENT OFFICERS
ARE THE BACKBONE OF OUR SOCIETY.
MOTHER[BEEP]S.
- YAAA-HOO!
- NOW THAT GUY IS GAINING.
WE'RE NEVER GONNA WIN THE RACE.
I HAVE TO GO TO THE BATHROOM. WILL YOU BUY ME A SODA?
MY FRIEND JIMMY'S DAD BOUGHT HIM A NEW SKATEBOARD.
I WANT A NEW SKATEBOARD.
THIS RACE IS STUPID.
- OOH! THIS'LL FOOL THEM DUKE BOYS.
[GIGGLING]
- THERE'S A DETOUR, BO.
- YAAA...
[CRASH]
- OH.
OH. MY GOD.
- I DON'T BELIEVE IN CHEATING, BATMAN.
I BELIEVE IN DOING WHAT'S RIGHT.
- IF YOU DON'T WANT A BAT BITCH-SLAP,
YOU'LL LAUNCH THE BATNET AND TAKE DOWN THOSE COPS.
- OOPS!
- AAH!
- RETRACT THE LINE. RETRACT THE LINE!
- NO, NO, DON'T RETRACT! DON'T RETRACT!
- AAH!
- AAH! GET HIM OFF ME!
[GIBBERISH]
OH, LORD! AAH!
[HOWLING]
- WE'RE ALMOST TO THE FINISH LINE, PARTNER.
OH.
- HA HA HA!
- MARIO, WE'RE LOSING.
- IT'S TIME TO USE THE BLUE TORTOISE SHELL, NO?
- DO IT, YOU MAGNIFICENT STEREOTYPICAL BASTARD.
- THE BLUE TORTOISE SHELL IS MARIO KART RACE'S ULTIMATE WEAPON.
IT MAGICALLY FINDS THE LEAD CAR IN THE RACE,
AND IT TAKES IT OUT.
HA HA HA!
- [GRUNTING]
URK!
[SNIFF]
- [CHEERING]
- YOU'RE MORE MAN THAN ME, HEADLESS PONCH.
- OOH!
- HEADLESS PONCH. - HEADLESS PONCH!
- AS THE WINNER, YOU RECEIVE THIS GIFT BASKET
FROM OMAHA STEAKS...
- AWESOME. WONDERFUL.
- AND A $50 GIFT CERTIFICATE FROM BEST BUY.
- BEST BUY! WOOF!
- AWW.
[CROWD JEERING]
- I'M IN AWE OF HEADLESS PONCH.
HE'S VERY ATTRACTIVE.
HEADLESS POUCH.
- HEADLESS POUCH.
PONCH. PONCH. PONCH. GO.
- HEADLESS STICK.
- HA HA HA!
- EXCUSE ME. I JUST FARTED IN A VERY MUSICAL TONE.
[SHOUTING GIBBERISH]]
- SHUT UP! - RUFF!
- I LIKE BEING AN AMERICAN.
I LIKE EVERYTHING ABOUT BEING BURT.
BEING BURT, BEING BURT, BEING BURT.
GOSH, IT'S GOOD.
[DIRECTOR'S SLATE CLAPS]
- [BELCH]
I WANT TO SHOW YOU SOMETHING THAT I'M VERY PROUD OF,
AND IT'S GONNA SCARE THE LIVING [BEEP] OUT OF YOU.
- HA HA HA!
- YOU WILL HAVE TO STEP BACK JUST A FEW FEET.
PRINT.
[FART]
LUNCH.
CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP
- STUPID MONKEY.