[ SCREAMING ] >> "ROBOT CHICKEN" IS CANCELED!
...IS CANCELED!
CANCELED!
[ BOTH SHOUT ] [ BODY THUDS ]
>> WELL, THAT WAS FUN.
BUT WITH "ROBOT CHICKEN" CANCELED, WE'LL NEED A WAY TO
MAKE MONEY.
>> AH, IF ONLY I'D CULTIVATED RELATIONSHIPS WITH SOME OF
HOLLYWOOD'S MOST DYNAMIC AND POWERFUL PLAYERS.
[ FINGERS SNAP ] WAIT A MINUTE.
THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I DID.
QUICK, MY LESS FAMOUS COMPANION, GRAB ON TO MY COATTAILS, AND
LET'S BE AWAY!
>> [ SIGHS ] RETARD.
WOW! WESLEYAN UNIVERSITY'S OWN JOSS WHEDON, CREATOR OF "BUFFY,"
"ANGEL," "FIREFLY," AND "DOLLHOUSE," THANKS FOR MEETING
WITH US.
>> WE KIND OF HAVE A FAVOR TO ASK.
>> OH, GOOD!
I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR A WAY TO REPAY YOU FOR BAILING ON "BUFFY"
AFTER TWO SEASONS.
ANYTHING, SETH, REALLY.
>> ACTUALLY, IT'S MORE LIKE US DOING YOU A FAVOR.
HOW WOULD YOU LIKE THE CREATORS OF "ROBOT CHICKEN" WRITING ON
ONE OF YOUR SHOWS?
>> YOU THINK YOU'RE WORTHY OF WRITING IN THE WHEDONVERSE?
>> OH, WOW, YOU ACTUALLY SAY "WHEDONVERSE" IN REAL LIFE.
>> THAT'S RIGHT!
AND AS ONE OF MY CREATIONS, I DO BELIEVE I HAVE LET YOU LIVE LONG
ENOUGH.
TIME TO DIE, WEREWOLF!
>> WOW! RON MOORE, CREATOR OF "BATTLESTAR GALACTICA"!
>> HOW ABOUT LETTING US COME ABOARD AND HELP YOU WITH YOUR
WHIP-SMART PLOTS?
>> HELP?
WHY WOULD I NEED HELP WRITING PLOTS?
I JUST THROW A DART AT THE CAST LIST, AND BOOM -- THEY'RE A
CYLON.
RINSE, REPEAT, CASH THE [BLEEP] CHECK.
WATCH. SHA-BOOM!
SHA-BONG! SHA-BING!
CYLON.
"OH, PLEASE HELP ME!
THIS IS SO HARD!" >> WELL, MAYBE I COULD ACT ON
THE SHOW.
I COULD BE A CYLON.
>> THAT'S RIGHT.
YOU COULD BE.
YOU WON'T GET ME, YOU [BLEEP] SKIN-JOBS!
>> HEY, IT'S SETH MacFARLANE, CREATOR OF "AMERICAN DAD."
>> HEY, HEY, COME ON, GUYS.
CREATOR OF "FAMILY GUY," PLEASE.
>> LOOK, SETH, WE'RE IN TROUBLE.
WE NEED TO MAKE SOME MONEY.
>> BUT YOU ALREADY HAVE A JOB VOICING CHRIS ON MY INSANELY
POPULAR SHOW.
>> YOU EXPECT ME TO LIVE ON HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS
A YEAR?
COME ON.
I DEPENDED ON "ROBOT CHICKEN."
>> "ROBOT CHICKEN"?
I HAVEN'T HEARD THAT NAME SINCE IT GOT RENEWED.
>> "ROBOT CHICKEN'S" RENEWED.
>> HA! HOW'D YOU DO THAT?
>> HOW DID I DO THAT?
NO ONE'S ASKED ME THAT QUESTION SINCE C-3PO BOUGHT ME A LEATHER
JACKET WITH PEPSI POINTS.
>> [ BURPS ] >> WOW! YOU CAN DO ANYTHING YOU
WANT!
QUICK! OFFHANDEDLY MENTION THAT TIME WE ALL ENDED WORLD HUNGER!
>> WHAT?
I HAVEN'T HEARD AN IDEA THAT BAD SINCE HANNA-BARBERA LAUNCHED
"SCOOBY-JEW."
>> LIKE, WOULD YOU DO IT FOR A SCOOBY SNACK?
>> ONE SCOOBY SNACK FOR ALL THE WORK I DO?
I GO INTO A DUNGEON, I EXPECT AT LEAST TWO, MAYBE THREE SCOOBY
SNACKS.
>> HA HA! DIE, WEREWOLF!
>> DIE, CYLON!
>> AND CHECKERBOARD WIPE TO...
[ THUNDER CRASHING ] [ DRILLING, SAWING ]
[ ELECTRICITY CRACKLING ] >> IT'S ALIVE!
>> ♪ GONNA BE A GREAT DAY ♪ ♪ WASHING DIRT AWAY ♪
♪ GOT TO GET IT ALL IN MY CRACKS AND CREVICES WITH THE SOAP ♪
♪ CLEAN, CLEAN, AND I LOVE TO SHOWER ♪
[ TOILET FLUSHES ] NO, AAH! AAH-HA!
AAH! AAH!
OW! BURNING! HOT!
>> [ CRYING ] >> YOUR HONOR, THE DEFENDANT WAS
ARRESTED WITHOUT A LICENSE IN A CAR CONTAINING THREE CONCEALED
WEAPONS AND OVER AN OUNCE OF MARIJUANA.
>> WELL, COUNSEL, IF YOUR CLIENT INSISTS ON PLEADING THE 5th,
I'LL HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO THROW THE BOOK AT HIM.
HOW DO YOU WANT TO PROCEED?
[ GONG CRASHES ] [ CROWD MURMURING ]
ORDER!
[ RAP MUSIC PLAYS ] >> THIS IS ABSURD.
HE WANTS TO THROW US OFF HIS SCENT.
>> ♪ GOOD POINT, TALKING DOG ♪ ♪ I'LL SET YOU FREE WITH SERVED
TIME ♪ >> YOU [BLEEP] UP NOW, PaRappa!
>> WHOA! OHH!
>> [ GROANS ] WHOA!
>> OH, JOHNNY, ISN'T IT BEAUTIFUL?
>> [ GASPS ] M-MAYBE WE SHOULD GO.
>> NO, NO, NO.
STAY.
TAKE OUT HER TITS.
>> STEVE, YOU AND YOUR WIFE ARE WONDERFUL HOSTS.
I'M BEING SINCERE.
>> YOU KNOW, JULIE, I DON'T THINK YOU EVER GOT A TOUR OF THE
HOUSE.
>> YOU'RE RIGHT.
>> WELL, COME ON.
[ BOTH LAUGHING ] >> MORE APPLE PIE FOR US, HUH?
>> OH, YOU.
[ DOORBELL RINGS ] OH, WHO COULD THAT BE?
[ DOOR OPENS ] >> ♪ TROJAN MAN ♪
>> EXCUSE ME, MADAM, BUT I AM NEEDED UPSTAIRS!
>> STEVE!
>> ♪ TROJAN MAN ♪ >> Keep it down!
>> I KNEW YOU ACTED WEIRD AROUND JULIE, YOU BASTARD!
>> PUT THIS ON YOUR PENIS!
>> GET OFF! GET OFF ME!
GET OFF ME!
>> JULIE, HOW COULD YOU?!
>> MY CLOTHES JUST FELL OFF.
>> HER VAGINA WILL APPRECIATE YOUR FORETHOUGHT!
>> WILL YOU SHUT THE [BLEEP] UP ALREADY?!
>> I AM LEAVING YOU!
>> ♪ TROJAN MAN ♪ >> HEY, WATCH THE HORSE!
THAT WAS MY GRANDMA'S -- OH, NO, YOU BROKE IT!
>> THAT WOULD NEVER HAPPEN TO A TROJAN CONDOM.
>> ♪ TROJAN MAN ♪ >> [ Crying ] YOU SAID MY
PROBLEM DIDN'T BOTHER YOU.
>> IT DOESN'T.
I MEAN, THIS DOESN'T CHANGE ANYTHING.
>> IT CHANGES EVERYTHING!
>> A RESERVOIR TIP IS FOR YOUR SEMEN!
>> I GOT TO GET OUT OF HERE.
>> YOU'RE A WHORE!
YOU RUINED MY LIFE, YOU WHORE!
[ CAR DOOR CLOSES, ENGINE TURNS OVER, TIRES SCREECHING ]
>> I GUESS I'D BETTER GO.
>> ♪ TROJAN MAN ♪ >> YEAH, WHY DON'T YOU JUST GET
THE [BLEEP] OUT OF HERE?
HOW ABOUT THAT?
>> ♪ TROJAN MAN ♪ >> JUST IN CASE.
>> OKAY, I NEED SOMEONE TO ACT LIKE THEY'RE ATTACKING ME.
LOUISE, HOW ABOUT YOU?
>> ME? UH, OKAY.
>> THAT'S RIGHT.
JUST COME AT ME.
>> HIYA!
AAH!
>> OKAY, DID EVERYONE SEE WHAT I DID THERE?
>> LAST TIME ON "A SHOT AT LOVE WITH TILA TEQUILA"...
>> LeBARON...
YOU HAVE A SHOT AT LOVE.
ARE YOU INTERESTED?
>> YES!
>> I'M SORRY, DYKE.
>> IT'S DIANE.
>> YO, I GOT TO GIVE A SHOUT-OUT TO MY ABS.
>> TILA, ARE YOU REALLY BISEXUAL?
BECAUSE I GET THE FEELING I NEVER HAD A CHANCE.
>> OH, I AM VERY BISEXIAL, DIANE.
I HAVE A NUMBER OF INTERESTS, INCLUDING ACTING AND HIP-HOP
RECORDING ARTIST.
I AM VERY BISEXIAL.
[ MOANING PASSIONATELY ] >> UNH! YEAH!
TOUGH TIE! YEAH!
>> BUT MY HEART WILL ALWAYS BELONG TO LEBANON.
>> IT'S LeBARON.
>> CUT!
THE MISPRONUNCIATIONS ARE STILL A PROBLEM.
>> BUT THAT'S WHY WE MADE HER OMNI-ETHIC, NOT TO MENTION THE
PREPUBESCENT ALIEN-WHORE APPEARANCE.
>> BUT IS IT READY?
>> WHO THE HELL ARE YOU PEOPLE?
WE'RE MAKING A REALITY SH-- >> IT HAS DEMONSTRATED A LIMITED
RANGE OF EMOTIONS, AND THE EMOTIONS ARE APPROPRIATE ALMOST
50% OF THE TIME.
>> ALL RIGHT! IT'S GO TIME!
>> WHERE'S LeBARON?
WHERE'S LeBARON?
>> WHAT IS IT SAYING?
>> LeBARON!
>> AAH!
>> [ GIGGLING ] LeB-B-B-ARON.
>> HEY, WHAT -- >> I LOVE LeBARON.
>> AAH! AA-A-A-A-A-A-H!
[ GLASS SHATTERING ] >> JUST BETWEEN HUEY AND ME...
[ CRYING ] [ LAUGHING ]
LeBARON IS DEAD.
NOW I HAVE TO FIND SOMEONE ELSE TO LOVE.
WHO WILL IT BE?
WATCH "TILA TEQUILA'S A SHOT AT LOVE" TONIGHT ON MTV.
[ LAUGHING ] [ CRYING ]
[ LAUGHING ] AAH!
>> MOMMY, MOMMY!
DID YOU KNOW "DOG" SPELLED BACKWARDS IS "GOD"?
>> THAT'S RIGHT, DEAR.
YOU'RE SUCH A CLEVER LITTLE GIRL.
>> KILL YOUR PARENTS, TRACY.
>> I WILL, GOD!
>> I'VE HEARD ABOUT YOU, LONE RANGER.
SILVER BULLETS MAY BE PRETTY TOO LOOK AT, BUT I BET THEY AIN'T NO
GOOD FOR SHOOTING.
>> OH, YEAH?
LOOK AT IT GO!
YEAH.
[ CHUCKLES ] >> THAT SILVER COULD HAVE FED MY
ENTIRE TRIBE FOR A YEAR.
>> NEXT QUESTION.
HAVE YOU EVER TOLD YOUR WIFE YOU LIKED HER DRESS WHEN YOU REALLY
DIDN'T?
>> [ EXHALES SLOWLY ] HO HO.
UM...
[ BREATHING HEAVILY ] OOH, HERE WE GO.
UM...
UH...
OOH.
OH, UH...
YES.
[ CROWD GASPS ] YES.
>> WOW! THEY PAD THE HELL OUT OF THAT SHOW, HUH?
THAT'S WHY I SUBSCRIBE TO "JUST THE GOOD PARTS" FROM MY
CABLE OR SATELLITE PROVIDER.
YOU CAN WATCH AN ENTIRE B.S.
GAME SHOW IN JUST 15 SECONDS.
>> EVER TOLD YOUR WIFE YOU LIKED HER DRESS WHEN YOU REALLY
DIDN'T?
>> YES.
>> EVER CHEATED ON YOUR TAXES?
>> YES.
>> EVER USE THE "N" WORD IN ANGER?
>> YES.
>> EVER PUT YOUR PENIS IN A SLINKY?
>> Y-- NO.
>> YOU LOSE!
>> AW.
>> "JUST THE GOOD PARTS" SPEEDS UP ALL YOUR FAVORITE SHOWS AND
MOVIES.
JUST WATCH!
[ "JAMES BOND" THEME PLAYS ] >> BOND. JAMES BOND.
>> AIII!
>> NOW THAT THE MISSION'S OVER, LET'S FIND YOUR BALLOON KNOT.
>> OH, JAMES!
>> I HAVE AIDS.
>> [ LAUGHING ] >> ♪ YA BA-DOP, DOO-BAH-DA
DEE BOP BA-DOODILY DAH ♪ ♪ DOO-DOO DAH DA-DO, YEAH ♪
>> I'M RUNNING AWAY FROM HOME!
I WANT TO GO HOME!
I WAS HOME ALL ALONG.
[ EXPLOSION ] >> A BASTARD IN A BASKET!
[ SOLEMN MUSIC PLAYS ] >> ♪ LAAAA ♪
♪ AA-AAAAHH ♪ ♪ LA-AAH ♪
[ FARTING ] >> NEVER A SAW A MAN KILLED WITH
A SWORD BEFORE.
>> WHY DON'T YOU TAKE A PICTURE?
>> WISH I HAD.
[ METAL CRUNCHING ] >> AND BEST PICTURE GOES TO...
"LAWRENCE OF ARABIA."
>> AAH! AAH! AAH! AAH!
[ DANCE MUSIC PLAYS ] [ FARTING ]
>> I'M A CYLON.
>> DAMN IT! I'M A CYLON!
>> I AM A CYLON.
>> [ Grumbling ] CYLON...
>> I AM A CYLON.
>> UH...I -- I'M A CYLON.
[ GUNSHOT ] >> GOTCHA, YOU FILTHY CYLON SON
OF A BITCH MOTHER [BLEEP] YOU DIE!
[ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS ]