WEBVTT X-TIMESTAMP-MAP=LOCAL:00:00:00.000,MPEGTS:9000 00:00:04.971 --> 00:00:08.942 line:10% position:35% size:50% [ THUNDER CRASHING ] 00:00:09.008 --> 00:00:10.877 line:10% position:35% size:50% [ DRILLING, SAWING ] 00:00:16.049 --> 00:00:18.051 line:10% position:43% size:63% [ ELECTRICITY CRACKLING ] 00:00:18.118 --> 00:00:19.886 line:10% position:28% size:35% >> IT'S ALIVE! 00:00:38.371 --> 00:00:41.474 line:79% position:50% size:80% >> GENTLEMEN, WHAT YOU'RE ABOUT TO SEE MUST NOT LEAVE THIS ROOM. 00:00:41.541 --> 00:00:42.409 line:85% position:33% size:43% [ SNAPS FINGERS ] 00:00:42.475 --> 00:00:43.943 line:85% position:30% size:40% >> DALLAS, 1963! 00:00:44.010 --> 00:00:45.412 line:85% position:30% size:38% THERE IS A CAT! 00:00:45.478 --> 00:00:46.713 line:85% position:28% size:33% MOSCOW, 1991! 00:00:46.780 --> 00:00:48.181 line:85% position:30% size:38% THERE IS A CAT! 00:00:48.248 --> 00:00:50.083 line:85% position:38% size:53% HERE ARE SOME STAIRS! 00:00:50.150 --> 00:00:51.551 line:85% position:30% size:38% THERE IS A CAT! 00:00:51.618 --> 00:00:53.219 line:85% position:33% size:45% NEW ORLEANS, 2005! 00:00:53.286 --> 00:00:55.488 line:85% position:30% size:38% THERE IS A CAT! 00:00:55.555 --> 00:00:57.490 line:85% position:50% size:80% >> SO, WHAT WE'RE SEEING IS THAT 00:00:57.557 --> 00:00:58.992 line:85% position:40% size:58% WE'RE BEING OBSERVED OR 00:00:59.058 --> 00:01:00.427 line:85% position:38% size:53% MANIPULATED BY A CAT. 00:01:00.493 --> 00:01:01.928 line:85% position:40% size:58% >> OR A NUMBER OF CATS. 00:01:01.995 --> 00:01:03.663 line:85% position:45% size:68% >> WHAT CAN WE DO ABOUT IT? 00:01:03.730 --> 00:01:04.531 line:85% position:25% size:28% >> NOTHING! 00:01:04.597 --> 00:01:07.700 line:85% position:35% size:48% YOU CAN DO NOTHING! 00:01:07.767 --> 00:01:09.636 line:85% position:33% size:43% [ ALL SCREAMING ] 00:01:13.940 --> 00:01:15.508 line:85% position:40% size:58% >> All: GOODBYE, HARRY! 00:01:15.575 --> 00:01:18.478 line:85% position:35% size:48% >> [ GRUNTS SADLY ] 00:01:18.545 --> 00:01:20.346 line:85% position:33% size:43% [ GRUNTS LOUDLY ] 00:01:20.413 --> 00:01:21.448 line:85% position:28% size:35% >> OH, MY GOD! 00:01:21.514 --> 00:01:22.482 line:85% position:28% size:33% ARE YOU OKAY? 00:01:22.549 --> 00:01:24.050 line:85% position:38% size:55% >> [ GRUNTS SLEEPILY ] 00:01:24.117 --> 00:01:24.684 line:85% position:15% size:10% UGH? 00:01:24.751 --> 00:01:26.252 line:85% position:40% size:60% >> OH, HI, YOU'RE AWAKE. 00:01:26.319 --> 00:01:27.654 line:85% position:35% size:48% I'M SALLY WILLIAMS. 00:01:27.720 --> 00:01:29.322 line:85% position:40% size:60% SORRY ABOUT HITTING YOU. 00:01:29.389 --> 00:01:30.056 line:85% position:28% size:35% >> OH, UH-HUH. 00:01:30.123 --> 00:01:31.491 line:85% position:50% size:78% >> AND THEN MY SECOND BOYFRIEND 00:01:31.558 --> 00:01:33.293 line:79% position:10% size:55% align:start EVER, LORENZO, WHAT AN EGOMANIAC. 00:01:33.359 --> 00:01:35.161 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start I MEAN, ALL HE CARED ABOUT WAS LACROSSE. 00:01:35.228 --> 00:01:36.329 line:85% position:45% size:70% WHY DON'T GUYS CALL YOU BACK 00:01:36.396 --> 00:01:37.030 line:85% position:28% size:33% THE NEXT DAY? 00:01:37.096 --> 00:01:37.997 line:85% position:28% size:33% >> [ GROANS ] 00:01:38.064 --> 00:01:39.732 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start >> I MEAN, I AM SO TIRED OF PLAYING GAMES. 00:01:39.799 --> 00:01:41.334 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start OKAY, YOU KNOW WHAT MAKES ME LAUGH? 00:01:41.401 --> 00:01:42.035 line:85% position:20% size:18% >> UNH? 00:01:42.101 --> 00:01:42.969 line:85% position:45% size:68% >> HOW GUYS DON'T KNOW WHEN 00:01:43.036 --> 00:01:44.070 line:85% position:43% size:63% WOMEN ARE FAKING ORGASMS. 00:01:44.137 --> 00:01:44.771 line:85% position:20% size:18% >> HUH? 00:01:44.838 --> 00:01:45.705 line:85% position:45% size:70% >> [ SCOFFS ] YOU DON'T KNOW 00:01:45.772 --> 00:01:46.739 line:85% position:40% size:58% WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT? 00:01:46.806 --> 00:01:49.442 line:85% position:48% size:75% [ Moaning ] OH! OHHHH! OHHHHH! 00:01:49.509 --> 00:01:51.010 line:85% position:30% size:38% >> [ GRUNTING ] 00:01:51.077 --> 00:01:51.778 line:85% position:23% size:25% >> OH! OH! 00:01:51.845 --> 00:01:53.246 line:85% position:40% size:58% >> [ GRUNTS FURIOUSLY ] 00:01:53.313 --> 00:01:54.113 line:85% position:25% size:30% >> OH, WHOA! 00:01:54.180 --> 00:01:55.315 line:85% position:33% size:45% OKAY, HARRY, WHOA! 00:01:55.381 --> 00:01:56.583 line:85% position:40% size:58% WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA. 00:01:56.649 --> 00:01:57.116 line:85% position:18% size:13% OKAY. 00:01:57.183 --> 00:01:58.117 line:85% position:30% size:40% OKAY, IT'S OKAY. 00:01:58.184 --> 00:01:58.985 line:85% position:28% size:35% >> [ PANTING ] 00:01:59.052 --> 00:02:00.019 line:85% position:25% size:30% EASY. RELAX. 00:02:00.086 --> 00:02:01.488 line:85% position:43% size:65% >> AND WHAT WILL YOU HAVE? 00:02:01.554 --> 00:02:02.388 line:85% position:25% size:30% >> I'M GOOD. 00:02:02.455 --> 00:02:04.791 line:79% position:25% size:80% align:start >> SO, WE'VE BEEN MARRIED FOR 10 YEARS. 00:02:04.858 --> 00:02:06.192 line:85% position:48% size:75% A LOT OF MY FRIENDS THINK IT'S 00:02:06.259 --> 00:02:07.727 line:85% position:45% size:70% WEIRD, ME [BLEEP] A BIGFOOT. 00:02:07.794 --> 00:02:09.128 line:85% position:43% size:63% BUT LOVE IS BLIND, RIGHT? 00:02:09.195 --> 00:02:09.963 line:85% position:28% size:33% >> [ SNIFFS ] 00:02:10.029 --> 00:02:11.564 line:85% position:48% size:73% >> YOU'RE -- YOU'RE NOT GONNA 00:02:11.631 --> 00:02:13.199 line:85% position:48% size:75% EAT THAT MEATBALL SANDWICH OUT 00:02:13.266 --> 00:02:14.367 line:85% position:35% size:50% IN THE OPEN ARE YOU? 00:02:14.434 --> 00:02:15.101 line:85% position:25% size:28% BE CAREFUL! 00:02:15.168 --> 00:02:16.736 line:85% position:28% size:33% >> [ GRUNTS ] 00:02:16.803 --> 00:02:18.905 line:85% position:30% size:38% [ TONE SOUNDS ] 00:02:18.972 --> 00:02:19.806 line:85% position:25% size:30% [ GRUNTING ] 00:02:19.873 --> 00:02:21.341 line:85% position:30% size:38% [ TONE SOUNDS ] 00:02:22.809 --> 00:02:25.278 line:85% position:30% size:38% [ BABY COOING ] 00:02:25.345 --> 00:02:27.013 line:85% position:48% size:75% >> OH, SHE'S JUST SO PRECIOUS! 00:02:27.080 --> 00:02:28.081 line:85% position:30% size:38% WHO'S PRECIOUS? 00:02:28.147 --> 00:02:29.949 line:85% position:28% size:33% YES, YOU ARE! 00:02:30.016 --> 00:02:32.385 line:85% position:25% size:30% OH! OH. UGH. 00:02:32.452 --> 00:02:34.320 line:85% position:23% size:25% >> AHHHHH. 00:02:47.567 --> 00:02:49.435 line:85% position:35% size:48% [ TURTLE MUNCHING ] 00:03:00.647 --> 00:03:05.318 line:85% position:43% size:65% >> SEE YOU JIZZBAGS LATER! 00:03:05.385 --> 00:03:06.686 line:85% position:45% size:68% >> WHEN "LORD OF THE RINGS" 00:03:06.753 --> 00:03:08.254 line:85% position:50% size:80% AUTHOR J.R.R. TOLKIEN PASSED ON, 00:03:08.321 --> 00:03:09.689 line:85% position:48% size:73% MANY THOUGHT MIDDLE EARTH HAD 00:03:09.756 --> 00:03:10.523 line:85% position:30% size:38% COME TO AN END. 00:03:10.590 --> 00:03:12.025 line:85% position:48% size:75% BUT RECENTLY RESEARCHERS FOUND 00:03:12.091 --> 00:03:13.459 line:85% position:48% size:73% A HALF-FINISHED MANUSCRIPT -- 00:03:13.526 --> 00:03:15.194 line:85% position:50% size:80% A SEQUEL TO "LORD OF THE RINGS." 00:03:15.261 --> 00:03:16.496 line:85% position:38% size:55% WHEN, ON DIRECT ORDERS 00:03:16.563 --> 00:03:17.664 line:85% position:35% size:50% FROM TOLKIEN'S WILL, 00:03:17.730 --> 00:03:19.032 line:85% position:40% size:60% HIS 6-YEAR-OLD GRANDSON, 00:03:19.098 --> 00:03:20.500 line:85% position:43% size:65% J.R.R. TOLKIEN JUNIOR JR., 00:03:20.567 --> 00:03:22.235 line:85% position:50% size:80% FINISHED THE NOVEL AND THE MOVIE 00:03:22.302 --> 00:03:23.436 line:85% position:35% size:50% WAS MADE, FANS HOPED 00:03:23.503 --> 00:03:25.071 line:85% position:48% size:75% MIDDLE EARTH WOULD RISE AGAIN. 00:03:25.138 --> 00:03:26.306 line:85% position:38% size:53% HERE NOW WE PRESENT A 00:03:26.372 --> 00:03:28.007 line:85% position:50% size:78% NEVER-BEFORE-SEEN SNEAK PEAK OF 00:03:28.074 --> 00:03:29.609 line:85% position:48% size:73% "LORD OF THE RINGS: THE FINAL 00:03:29.676 --> 00:03:30.276 line:85% position:23% size:23% JOURNEY." 00:03:30.343 --> 00:03:33.613 line:85% position:45% size:70% [ SOMBER FLUTE MUSIC PLAYS ] 00:03:33.680 --> 00:03:34.914 line:85% position:35% size:50% >> OH, MERRY, I MISS 00:03:34.981 --> 00:03:36.115 line:85% position:33% size:45% MR. FRODO ALREADY. 00:03:36.182 --> 00:03:37.317 line:85% position:33% size:45% >> ME TOO, PIPPIN. 00:03:37.383 --> 00:03:39.352 line:85% position:48% size:75% FRODO WAS A DEAR, DEAR FRIEND. 00:03:39.419 --> 00:03:40.787 line:85% position:35% size:48% I LIKE TO EAT POOP. 00:03:40.853 --> 00:03:42.455 line:85% position:40% size:60% HEY, LOOK, IT'S GANDALF! 00:03:42.522 --> 00:03:43.823 line:85% position:33% size:45% [ HORSE WHINNIES ] 00:03:43.890 --> 00:03:45.224 line:85% position:35% size:48% >> MERRY, PIPPIN... 00:03:45.291 --> 00:03:46.459 line:85% position:30% size:40% WE ARE NOT SAFE! 00:03:46.526 --> 00:03:48.628 line:85% position:50% size:80% A DARK MENACE RISES TO THE EAST. 00:03:48.695 --> 00:03:50.029 line:85% position:35% size:48% DUCKIES GO "QUACK." 00:03:50.096 --> 00:03:51.130 line:85% position:28% size:35% COWS GO "MOO." 00:03:51.197 --> 00:03:52.065 line:85% position:20% size:20% [ MOO! ] 00:03:52.131 --> 00:03:53.633 line:85% position:33% size:43% I WANT ICE CREAM. 00:03:53.700 --> 00:03:54.367 line:85% position:23% size:23% [ OINK! ] 00:03:54.434 --> 00:03:55.969 line:85% position:48% size:73% VERILY, WILL YOU HOBBITS JOIN 00:03:56.035 --> 00:03:56.636 line:85% position:23% size:23% MY QUEST? 00:03:56.703 --> 00:03:58.137 line:85% position:43% size:65% >> Both: YES, MR. GANDALF. 00:03:58.204 --> 00:03:59.238 line:85% position:33% size:45% >> WHAT ABOUT YOU, 00:03:59.305 --> 00:04:00.506 line:85% position:30% size:38% HANNAH MONTANA? 00:04:00.573 --> 00:04:02.308 line:85% position:35% size:50% >> ♪ I LIKE MACARONI 00:04:02.375 --> 00:04:03.376 line:85% position:25% size:30% AND CHEESE ♪ 00:04:03.443 --> 00:04:05.244 line:85% position:30% size:38% >> I WANT POOP! 00:04:05.311 --> 00:04:06.746 line:85% position:45% size:68% THESE F-16s WILL TAKE US AS 00:04:06.813 --> 00:04:08.214 line:85% position:48% size:75% FAR AS THE ERENDOR RIVER, THEN 00:04:08.281 --> 00:04:09.782 line:85% position:50% size:80% WE'LL HAVE TO FIND THE BRIDGE OF 00:04:09.849 --> 00:04:10.383 line:85% position:23% size:23% LARAKAEI. 00:04:10.450 --> 00:04:11.117 line:85% position:25% size:28% >> QUICKLY! 00:04:11.184 --> 00:04:12.518 line:85% position:48% size:73% EVERYONE MAKE JET NOISES WITH 00:04:12.585 --> 00:04:13.286 line:85% position:25% size:28% YOUR MOUTH! 00:04:13.353 --> 00:04:17.924 line:85% position:50% size:80% [ ALL IMITATING JETS WHOOSHING ] 00:04:17.991 --> 00:04:19.359 line:85% position:20% size:18% >> MOO! 00:04:23.296 --> 00:04:25.164 line:85% position:48% size:73% >> THE 3-HEADED PEANUT BUTTER 00:04:25.231 --> 00:04:26.799 line:85% position:40% size:60% AND JELLY MONSTER IS TOO 00:04:26.866 --> 00:04:29.268 line:85% position:45% size:68% POWERFUL, AND I LIKE TO EAT 00:04:29.335 --> 00:04:31.170 line:85% position:48% size:73% POOP, POOP, POOP, POOP, POOP, 00:04:31.237 --> 00:04:32.138 line:85% position:40% size:58% POOP, POOP, POOP, POOP! 00:04:32.205 --> 00:04:33.106 line:85% position:40% size:60% >> I DON'T WANT TO DO MY 00:04:33.172 --> 00:04:33.840 line:85% position:23% size:23% HOMEWORK. 00:04:33.906 --> 00:04:34.774 line:85% position:48% size:73% >> LET'S ALL SING "THE MUFFIN 00:04:34.841 --> 00:04:35.508 line:85% position:18% size:13% MAN." 00:04:35.575 --> 00:04:36.275 line:85% position:48% size:73% >> All: ♪ OH, DO YOU KNOW THE 00:04:36.342 --> 00:04:36.876 line:85% position:28% size:33% MUFFIN MAN? ♪ 00:04:36.943 --> 00:04:37.677 line:85% position:33% size:43% ♪ THE MUFFIN MAN, 00:04:37.744 --> 00:04:38.478 line:85% position:30% size:40% THE MUFFIN MAN ♪ 00:04:38.544 --> 00:04:39.779 line:85% position:48% size:75% ♪ OH, DO YOU KNOW THE MUFFIN ♪ 00:04:39.846 --> 00:04:41.648 line:85% position:48% size:73% [ ZIP! SPROING! ZOOM! ZING! ] 00:04:41.714 --> 00:04:43.416 line:85% position:45% size:68% [ CHATTERING AND GROWLING ] 00:04:43.483 --> 00:04:44.817 line:85% position:23% size:23% [ MEOW! ] 00:04:44.884 --> 00:04:47.754 line:85% position:50% size:78% YOU SHALL NOT POOP, POOP, POOP, 00:04:47.820 --> 00:04:48.988 line:85% position:33% size:43% POOP, POOP, POOP! 00:04:49.055 --> 00:04:51.290 line:85% position:43% size:63% >> I'M SORRY. WHAT THE -- 00:04:51.357 --> 00:04:53.926 line:85% position:30% size:38% [ TONE SOUNDS ] 00:04:55.995 --> 00:04:56.996 line:85% position:28% size:35% >> [ SCREAMS ] 00:04:57.063 --> 00:04:58.164 line:85% position:35% size:48% >> AAH! GET IT OFF! 00:04:58.231 --> 00:05:01.334 line:85% position:28% size:33% >> [ GROANS ] 00:05:01.401 --> 00:05:02.969 line:85% position:35% size:48% [ GROANING ] UH-OH. 00:05:03.036 --> 00:05:03.903 line:85% position:25% size:30% [ GROANING ] 00:05:03.970 --> 00:05:04.704 line:85% position:25% size:30% [ WHISTLE! ] 00:05:04.771 --> 00:05:06.039 line:85% position:20% size:18% AAAAAH! 00:05:06.105 --> 00:05:06.839 line:85% position:23% size:23% [ THUD! ] 00:05:06.906 --> 00:05:07.473 line:85% position:20% size:20% WAAAAAH! 00:05:07.540 --> 00:05:07.974 line:85% position:23% size:25% [ SMACK! ] 00:05:08.041 --> 00:05:09.742 line:85% position:25% size:28% [ PANTING ] 00:05:09.809 --> 00:05:11.577 line:85% position:20% size:18% AAAAAH! 00:05:11.644 --> 00:05:12.412 line:85% position:25% size:30% [ WHISTLE! ] 00:05:12.478 --> 00:05:14.380 line:85% position:30% size:38% AAH! [ GRUNTS ] 00:05:14.447 --> 00:05:14.914 line:85% position:25% size:30% [ WHISTLE! ] 00:05:14.981 --> 00:05:15.415 line:85% position:18% size:13% AAAH! 00:05:15.481 --> 00:05:20.053 line:85% position:25% size:30% [ GRUNTING ] 00:05:20.119 --> 00:05:28.094 line:85% position:25% size:30% AAAAAAAAH... 00:05:28.161 --> 00:05:29.462 line:85% position:33% size:43% [ SPLAT! CRASH! ] 00:05:29.529 --> 00:05:30.496 line:85% position:30% size:40% >> [ SCREAMING ] 00:05:30.563 --> 00:05:31.764 line:85% position:25% size:28% [ Dialing ] 00:05:31.831 --> 00:05:34.500 line:85% position:48% size:75% >> [ SPEAKING ALIEN LANGUAGE ] 00:05:34.567 --> 00:05:36.536 line:85% position:28% size:35% [ BOTH GRUNT ] 00:05:36.602 --> 00:05:37.236 line:85% position:28% size:33% >> [ GROANS ] 00:05:37.303 --> 00:05:40.239 line:85% position:38% size:53% [ BREATHING HEAVILY ] 00:05:40.306 --> 00:05:42.975 line:85% position:30% size:38% [ SIREN WAILS ] 00:05:43.042 --> 00:05:44.043 line:85% position:33% size:43% [ TIRES SCREECH ] 00:05:44.110 --> 00:05:45.978 line:85% position:23% size:25% [ CRASH! ] 00:05:51.651 --> 00:05:53.519 line:85% position:38% size:53% [ DOOR HINGES CREAK ] 00:05:56.856 --> 00:05:59.158 line:85% position:48% size:75% >> MY NAME IS MURRAY AND AIN'T 00:05:59.225 --> 00:06:01.227 line:85% position:45% size:68% NOBODY GONNA TELL ME HOW TO 00:06:01.294 --> 00:06:02.829 line:85% position:30% size:40% CONJUGATE VERBS! 00:06:09.001 --> 00:06:11.237 line:85% position:33% size:43% >> HI, I'M STEVE. 00:06:11.304 --> 00:06:12.405 line:85% position:30% size:38% >> HEY. RACHEL. 00:06:12.472 --> 00:06:14.006 line:85% position:43% size:63% >> SO, WHAT'S YOUR MAJOR? 00:06:14.073 --> 00:06:15.141 line:85% position:28% size:35% >> PHILOSOPHY. 00:06:15.208 --> 00:06:17.176 line:85% position:48% size:75% >> OH, LOTS OF DEMAND FOR THAT 00:06:17.243 --> 00:06:18.778 line:85% position:38% size:55% IN THE WORKPLACE, HUH? 00:06:18.845 --> 00:06:19.946 line:85% position:35% size:50% [ RECORD SCRATCHES ] 00:06:20.012 --> 00:06:21.013 line:85% position:33% size:45% >> CLEAR THE AREA! 00:06:21.080 --> 00:06:22.181 line:85% position:35% size:50% THIS IS HURT LOCKER. 00:06:22.248 --> 00:06:23.883 line:85% position:50% size:80% GOT A GUY JUST STEPPED ON A LAND 00:06:23.950 --> 00:06:24.584 line:85% position:18% size:13% MINE. 00:06:24.650 --> 00:06:25.885 line:85% position:45% size:70% >> ACTUALLY, MY FATHER HAD A 00:06:25.952 --> 00:06:27.120 line:85% position:33% size:45% PHILOSOPHY DEGREE. 00:06:27.186 --> 00:06:28.154 line:85% position:30% size:38% >> OKAY, BUDDY. 00:06:28.221 --> 00:06:29.222 line:85% position:30% size:38% JUST STAY CALM. 00:06:29.288 --> 00:06:32.525 line:85% position:50% size:78% >> OH, HE MUST BE VERY PROUD OF 00:06:32.592 --> 00:06:33.359 line:85% position:15% size:10% YOU. 00:06:33.426 --> 00:06:34.761 line:85% position:38% size:53% >> THAT'S IT. STEADY. 00:06:34.827 --> 00:06:36.062 line:85% position:40% size:58% >> ACTUALLY, HE'S DEAD. 00:06:36.129 --> 00:06:36.929 line:85% position:28% size:35% >> OH, MY GOD! 00:06:36.996 --> 00:06:38.598 line:85% position:50% size:78% IT'S CLICKED AND READY TO BLOW! 00:06:38.664 --> 00:06:40.133 line:85% position:50% size:78% I'VE ONLY GOT SECONDS TO DEFUSE 00:06:40.199 --> 00:06:40.833 line:85% position:18% size:13% THIS! 00:06:40.900 --> 00:06:42.268 line:85% position:45% size:70% >> "I'M SORRY TO HEAR THAT." 00:06:42.335 --> 00:06:42.969 line:85% position:20% size:20% >> GOOD. 00:06:43.035 --> 00:06:44.570 line:85% position:45% size:70% >> "IT MUST HAVE BEEN HARD." 00:06:44.637 --> 00:06:46.105 line:85% position:43% size:65% >> HANG IN THERE. HANG ON. 00:06:46.172 --> 00:06:47.273 line:85% position:33% size:45% >> HOW DID HE DIE? 00:06:47.340 --> 00:06:49.075 line:85% position:50% size:80% >> HE COULDN'T GET A JOB, AND HE 00:06:49.142 --> 00:06:50.076 line:85% position:30% size:38% KILLED HIMSELF. 00:06:50.143 --> 00:06:52.912 line:85% position:50% size:78% >> DON'T YOU [BLEEP] MOVE, MAN! 00:06:52.979 --> 00:06:55.748 line:85% position:40% size:58% >> [ MUFFLED LAUGHING ] 00:06:55.815 --> 00:06:56.616 line:85% position:25% size:30% [ LAUGHING ] 00:06:56.682 --> 00:06:57.750 line:85% position:33% size:45% >> I'M SORRY, MAN! 00:06:57.817 --> 00:06:58.484 line:85% position:23% size:25% I'M SORRY! 00:06:58.551 --> 00:07:00.052 line:85% position:43% size:65% I JUST WASN'T GOOD ENOUGH. 00:07:00.119 --> 00:07:04.290 line:85% position:25% size:28% >> W-WHAT?! 00:07:04.357 --> 00:07:12.431 line:85% position:28% size:33% NOOOOOOOOOOO! 00:07:18.404 --> 00:07:24.143 line:85% position:25% size:30% >> GET BACK! 00:07:24.210 --> 00:07:25.077 line:85% position:28% size:35% >> ROCK BITER? 00:07:25.144 --> 00:07:26.579 line:85% position:43% size:63% I'VE LOST MY LUCK DRAGON, 00:07:26.646 --> 00:07:27.313 line:85% position:20% size:20% AND I -- 00:07:27.380 --> 00:07:28.915 line:85% position:48% size:73% >> THEY LOOK LIKE BIG, STRONG 00:07:28.981 --> 00:07:30.082 line:85% position:33% size:45% HANDS, DON'T THEY? 00:07:30.149 --> 00:07:31.784 line:85% position:48% size:73% THAT'S WHAT I ALWAYS THOUGHT. 00:07:31.851 --> 00:07:33.219 line:85% position:40% size:60% BUT MY LITTLE FRIENDS -- 00:07:33.286 --> 00:07:34.754 line:85% position:43% size:65% I COULDN'T HOLD ONTO THEM. 00:07:34.821 --> 00:07:36.489 line:85% position:48% size:75% >> THAT'S TERRIBLE, BUT FALCOR 00:07:36.556 --> 00:07:37.657 line:85% position:33% size:45% NEEDS ME, AND I -- 00:07:37.723 --> 00:07:39.492 line:85% position:50% size:80% >> THE NOTHING PULLED THEM RIGHT 00:07:39.559 --> 00:07:42.228 line:85% position:43% size:65% OUT OF MY HANDS -- MY BIG, 00:07:42.295 --> 00:07:43.462 line:85% position:35% size:48% STRONG, GOOD HANDS. 00:07:43.529 --> 00:07:45.264 line:85% position:48% size:75% >> YOU KNOW, THE MORE YOU TALK 00:07:45.331 --> 00:07:47.099 line:85% position:50% size:78% ABOUT HOW GREAT YOUR HANDS ARE, 00:07:47.166 --> 00:07:48.968 line:85% position:50% size:78% THE HARDER IT IS TO BELIEVE YOU 00:07:49.035 --> 00:07:50.469 line:85% position:40% size:60% COULDN'T HOLD ON TO YOUR 00:07:50.536 --> 00:07:51.204 line:85% position:20% size:20% FRIENDS. 00:07:51.270 --> 00:07:52.872 line:85% position:48% size:73% >> I WAS HOPING THE SOLILOQUY 00:07:52.939 --> 00:07:55.141 line:85% position:48% size:73% ABOUT MY HANDS WOULD KEEP YOU 00:07:55.208 --> 00:07:56.442 line:85% position:43% size:65% FROM ASKING ANY QUESTIONS. 00:07:56.509 --> 00:07:57.810 line:85% position:48% size:73% >> YEAH, I WAS ALMOST GETTING 00:07:57.877 --> 00:07:59.312 line:85% position:50% size:78% CHOKED UP, BUT THEN I WAS LIKE, 00:07:59.378 --> 00:08:00.012 line:85% position:18% size:15% "WHAT? 00:08:00.079 --> 00:08:01.147 line:85% position:45% size:70% ROCK BITER'S TALKING WAY TOO 00:08:01.214 --> 00:08:02.415 line:85% position:43% size:65% MUCH ABOUT HIS HANDS, YO." 00:08:02.481 --> 00:08:03.850 line:85% position:48% size:73% >> THEY ALL BULLIED ME PRETTY 00:08:03.916 --> 00:08:04.617 line:85% position:15% size:10% BAD. 00:08:04.684 --> 00:08:05.852 line:85% position:50% size:78% REPLACE THE "R" IN MY NAME WITH 00:08:05.918 --> 00:08:07.486 line:85% position:50% size:78% A "C" AND YOU'RE GETTING A GOOD 00:08:07.553 --> 00:08:08.921 line:85% position:45% size:68% IDEA OF WHAT I PUT UP WITH. 00:08:08.988 --> 00:08:10.556 line:85% position:50% size:78% YEAH, I DIDN'T EVEN TRY TO HOLD 00:08:10.623 --> 00:08:11.691 line:85% position:38% size:53% ON TO THEM, ACTUALLY. 00:08:11.757 --> 00:08:13.292 line:85% position:48% size:75% I JUST WATCHED THEM AND WAVED. 00:08:13.359 --> 00:08:14.694 line:85% position:43% size:65% >> I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR A 00:08:14.760 --> 00:08:16.195 line:85% position:33% size:45% NEVERENDING STORY. 00:08:16.262 --> 00:08:18.030 line:85% position:43% size:63% >> [ CHUCKLES ] GOOD ONE. 00:08:18.097 --> 00:08:18.965 line:85% position:23% size:25% HIGH-FIVE. 00:08:19.031 --> 00:08:20.299 line:85% position:35% size:50% >> NOT ON YOUR LIFE. 00:08:20.366 --> 00:08:21.033 line:85% position:25% size:30% >> UH, MEOW. 00:08:21.100 --> 00:08:21.734 line:85% position:48% size:73% I NEED A GUN AND MAKE SURE IT 00:08:21.801 --> 00:08:23.502 line:85% position:43% size:63% HOLDS NINE BULLETS. MEOW. 00:08:25.771 --> 00:08:28.908 line:85% position:45% size:70% >> ♪ I WAS BORN IN THE WORLD 00:08:28.975 --> 00:08:32.278 line:85% position:30% size:40% OF VIDEO GAMES ♪ 00:08:32.345 --> 00:08:34.513 line:85% position:43% size:63% >> ♪ AND I'VE BEEN LONELY 00:08:34.580 --> 00:08:37.583 line:85% position:25% size:30% EVER SINCE ♪ 00:08:37.650 --> 00:08:39.218 line:85% position:38% size:55% ♪ EVERYONE'S TRYING TO 00:08:39.285 --> 00:08:42.488 line:85% position:35% size:48% SAVE THE PRINCESS ♪ 00:08:42.555 --> 00:08:44.891 line:85% position:38% size:55% ♪ BUT WHO'S GONNA SAVE 00:08:44.957 --> 00:08:47.560 line:85% position:28% size:33% THE PRINCE? ♪ 00:08:47.627 --> 00:08:49.962 line:85% position:43% size:63% ♪ I'M THE FIRST PERSON IN 00:08:50.029 --> 00:08:52.198 line:85% position:28% size:35% A VIDEO GAME ♪ 00:08:52.265 --> 00:08:53.566 line:85% position:33% size:43% ♪ TO ADMIT I LIKE 00:08:53.633 --> 00:08:57.103 line:85% position:35% size:48% THE POLE POSITION ♪ 00:08:57.169 --> 00:08:59.906 line:85% position:43% size:65% ♪ SO I'M CALLING OTHER GAY 00:08:59.972 --> 00:09:02.008 line:85% position:45% size:68% CHARACTERS TO JOIN ME IN MY 00:09:02.074 --> 00:09:06.579 line:85% position:48% size:73% MISSION TO COME OUT AND SAY ♪ 00:09:06.646 --> 00:09:08.114 line:85% position:35% size:48% >> All: YOU'RE GAY! 00:09:08.180 --> 00:09:09.749 line:85% position:33% size:45% >> ♪ I'M ZANGIEF ♪ 00:09:09.815 --> 00:09:11.017 line:85% position:30% size:38% ♪ WHAT A RELIEF 00:09:11.083 --> 00:09:14.153 line:85% position:43% size:65% TO SAY I LIKE GUY-ON-GUY ♪ 00:09:14.220 --> 00:09:15.855 line:85% position:38% size:55% ♪ YOU USED TO WATCH ME 00:09:15.922 --> 00:09:16.923 line:85% position:43% size:63% STICK GUYS IN MY CROTCH ♪ 00:09:16.989 --> 00:09:17.790 line:85% position:38% size:55% >> [ Muffled ] HYUKEN? 00:09:17.857 --> 00:09:18.958 line:85% position:45% size:68% >> ♪ AND NOW YOU UNDERSTAND 00:09:19.025 --> 00:09:20.326 line:85% position:18% size:13% WHY ♪ 00:09:20.393 --> 00:09:20.993 line:85% position:30% size:40% >> All: I'M GAY! 00:09:21.060 --> 00:09:22.361 line:85% position:40% size:58% >> ♪ I AM CLOUD STRIFE, 00:09:22.428 --> 00:09:23.896 line:85% position:35% size:48% DON'T HAVE A WIFE ♪ 00:09:23.963 --> 00:09:25.131 line:85% position:40% size:58% >> All: ♪ HIS STRIFE! ♪ 00:09:25.197 --> 00:09:28.000 line:85% position:40% size:60% >> ♪ MY FINAL FANTASY IS 00:09:28.067 --> 00:09:29.435 line:85% position:43% size:63% TO WEAR WOMEN'S CLOTHES ♪ 00:09:29.502 --> 00:09:31.037 line:85% position:35% size:48% ♪ HOT TUB WITH BROS 00:09:31.103 --> 00:09:34.040 line:85% position:40% size:58% AND GIVE THEM MY H.P. ♪ 00:09:34.106 --> 00:09:35.641 line:85% position:45% size:70% UH, THAT MEANS "HARD PENIS." 00:09:35.708 --> 00:09:36.742 line:85% position:33% size:45% >> All: WE'RE GAY! 00:09:36.809 --> 00:09:37.710 line:85% position:45% size:68% >> ♪ I'M PARAPPA THE RAPPA, 00:09:37.777 --> 00:09:38.644 line:85% position:43% size:65% AND I'M FILLED WITH LOVE ♪ 00:09:38.711 --> 00:09:39.612 line:85% position:30% size:40% ♪ MY FRIEND P.J. 00:09:39.679 --> 00:09:40.780 line:85% position:35% size:50% GIVES ME A BIG HUG ♪ 00:09:40.846 --> 00:09:41.814 line:85% position:43% size:65% ♪ AND I SQUEEZE REAL HARD, 00:09:41.881 --> 00:09:42.748 line:85% position:40% size:58% AND I "HOLD ON TIGHT" ♪ 00:09:42.815 --> 00:09:43.983 line:85% position:48% size:75% ♪ BUT HE PUSHES ME AWAY 'CAUSE 00:09:44.050 --> 00:09:46.786 line:85% position:43% size:65% HE THINKS IT'S NOT RIGHT ♪ 00:09:46.852 --> 00:09:47.887 line:85% position:40% size:60% >> ♪ PLEASE DON'T JUDGE, 00:09:47.954 --> 00:09:49.488 line:85% position:33% size:45% I PACK THE FUDGE ♪ 00:09:49.555 --> 00:09:50.823 line:85% position:30% size:40% ♪ I CHASE GHOSTS 00:09:50.890 --> 00:09:52.758 line:85% position:30% size:40% DOWN THE HALLS ♪ 00:09:52.825 --> 00:09:54.193 line:85% position:35% size:50% YOU NEVER GUESSED? ♪ 00:09:54.260 --> 00:09:54.961 line:85% position:20% size:18% >> YES! 00:09:55.027 --> 00:09:55.962 line:85% position:35% size:48% >> ♪ I'M OBSESSED ♪ 00:09:56.028 --> 00:09:56.662 line:85% position:25% size:30% >> OBSESSED! 00:09:56.729 --> 00:09:57.763 line:85% position:38% size:53% >> ♪ WITH MUNCHING ON 00:09:57.830 --> 00:09:58.898 line:85% position:25% size:28% THE BALLS ♪ 00:09:58.965 --> 00:10:01.600 line:85% position:15% size:10% OOH! 00:10:01.667 --> 00:10:03.369 line:85% position:40% size:60% >> ♪ WE'RE FINALLY PROUD 00:10:03.436 --> 00:10:05.705 line:85% position:38% size:53% TO SAY "WE'RE GAY!" ♪ 00:10:05.771 --> 00:10:07.306 line:85% position:48% size:73% ♪ PLUG YOUR CONTROLLER IN AND 00:10:07.373 --> 00:10:08.140 line:85% position:28% size:33% LET'S BEGIN ♪ 00:10:08.207 --> 00:10:09.709 line:85% position:45% size:70% ♪ TO START A BRAND-NEW DAY ♪ 00:10:09.775 --> 00:10:11.477 line:85% position:50% size:78% ♪ PLAY WITH YOUR WII, GRAB YOUR 00:10:11.544 --> 00:10:14.213 line:85% position:38% size:55% Sexbox, GayStation 3 ♪ 00:10:14.280 --> 00:10:16.749 line:85% position:45% size:68% ♪ AND MAYBE YOU'LL SEE THAT 00:10:16.816 --> 00:10:19.452 line:85% position:45% size:68% IT'S OKAY TO BE AS GAY AS ♪ 00:10:19.518 --> 00:10:20.853 line:85% position:18% size:15% >> ME! 00:10:20.920 --> 00:10:23.289 line:85% position:25% size:30% [ APPLAUSE ] 00:10:23.356 --> 00:10:24.523 line:10% position:40% size:60% >> ♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK ♪ 00:10:24.590 --> 00:10:25.691 line:10% position:38% size:53% ♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK ♪ 00:10:25.758 --> 00:10:27.159 line:10% position:50% size:78% ♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK-A-WAWK WAWK 00:10:27.226 --> 00:10:27.827 line:10% position:25% size:28% BAWK BAWK ♪ 00:10:27.893 --> 00:10:28.961 line:10% position:38% size:53% ♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK ♪ 00:10:29.028 --> 00:10:29.962 line:10% position:38% size:53% ♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK ♪ 00:10:30.029 --> 00:10:31.464 line:10% position:50% size:78% ♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK-A-WAWK WAWK 00:10:31.530 --> 00:10:32.131 line:10% position:25% size:28% BAWK BAWK ♪ 00:10:32.198 --> 00:10:33.199 line:10% position:38% size:53% ♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK ♪ 00:10:33.265 --> 00:10:34.266 line:10% position:38% size:53% ♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK ♪ 00:10:34.333 --> 00:10:35.801 line:10% position:50% size:78% ♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK-A-WAWK WAWK 00:10:35.868 --> 00:10:36.469 line:10% position:25% size:28% BAWK BAWK ♪ 00:10:36.535 --> 00:10:38.404 line:10% position:28% size:35% BA-GAWK! BAWK.