WEBVTT
X-TIMESTAMP-MAP=LOCAL:00:00:00.000,MPEGTS:9000
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>> "ROBOT CHICKEN."
00:00:04.637 --> 00:00:07.974 line:21% position:10% size:68% align:start
FOR 100 EPISODES, THEY'VE
DEFILED EVERY ENTERTAINMENT
00:00:08.041 --> 00:00:09.776 line:21% position:45% size:70%
BRAND IN THE KNOWN UNIVERSE.
00:00:09.843 --> 00:00:12.512 line:21% position:23% size:78% align:start
[ TING! ]
NOW THEIR GREATEST CHALLENGE --
00:00:12.579 --> 00:00:16.483 line:21% position:10% size:80% align:start
RIDING THE COATTAILS OF THE MOST
ICONIC CHARACTERS OF ALL TIME,
00:00:16.549 --> 00:00:18.184 line:21% position:50% size:65%
NOT COUNTING HARRY POTTER.
00:00:18.251 --> 00:00:20.019 line:21% position:50% size:65%
THE DC COMICS SUPERHEROES!
00:00:20.086 --> 00:00:22.722 line:21% position:10% size:70% align:start
SOME OF THEM MORE SUPER THAN
OTHERS.
00:00:22.789 --> 00:00:24.691 line:21% position:50% size:70%
THAT GUY JUST TALKS TO FISH.
00:00:24.758 --> 00:00:26.726 line:21% position:20% size:18%
>> HEY!
00:00:26.793 --> 00:00:28.595 line:21% position:10% size:33% align:start
[ BAM! BAM! ]
[ CLONK! ]
00:00:35.635 --> 00:00:37.437 line:79% position:23% size:23%
[ WHAP! ]
[ PLOP! ]
00:00:44.577 --> 00:00:52.051 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
THIS IS THE "ROBOT CHICKEN
DC COMICS SPECIAL" -- #rcdc.
00:00:52.118 --> 00:00:53.386 line:85% position:50% size:75%
>> OH, BOY! THE INVISIBLE JET!
00:00:53.453 --> 00:00:54.053 line:85% position:25% size:30%
>> HURRY UP!
00:00:54.120 --> 00:00:54.954 line:85% position:35% size:48%
>> LET'S GO, BUDDY!
00:00:55.021 --> 00:00:55.555 line:85% position:25% size:28%
>> COME ON!
00:00:55.622 --> 00:00:56.122 line:85% position:28% size:35%
>> I'M COMING!
00:00:56.189 --> 00:00:56.623 line:85% position:15% size:8%
OW!
00:00:56.689 --> 00:00:57.290 line:85% position:23% size:25%
>> PSYCHE!
00:00:57.357 --> 00:00:58.258 line:79% position:10% size:30% align:start
[ LAUGHTER ]
OW!
00:00:58.324 --> 00:00:59.793 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
>> LAST ONE TO THE PARTY CAN'T
FLY.
00:00:59.859 --> 00:01:01.728 line:79% position:15% size:78% align:start
YOU'RE GONNA BE THE LAST ONE TO
THE PARTY.
00:01:01.795 --> 00:01:02.562 line:85% position:38% size:53%
'CAUSE YOU CAN'T FLY.
00:01:02.629 --> 00:01:03.263 line:85% position:20% size:20%
>> FINE.
00:01:03.329 --> 00:01:07.300 line:85% position:38% size:53%
I'LL JUST SWIM THERE.
00:01:07.367 --> 00:01:10.904 line:79% position:10% size:38% align:start
[ SIGHS ]
>> SILLY PUNKS.
00:01:10.970 --> 00:01:12.305 line:85% position:38% size:55%
BATMAN OWNS THE NIGHT.
00:01:12.372 --> 00:01:14.574 line:79% position:10% size:55% align:start
NOW TASTE FEAR, YOU --
WAIT. WAIT. WHAT?
00:01:14.641 --> 00:01:15.975 line:85% position:20% size:20%
OH, GOD!
00:01:16.042 --> 00:01:18.878 line:79% position:15% size:78% align:start
OH, MY BACK JUST SNAPPED LIKE A
PACK OF UNCOOKED SPAGHETTI!
00:01:18.945 --> 00:01:22.449 line:79% position:48% size:75%
OH, YOU JUST WALK UP AND BREAK
MY BACK WITHOUT SAYING A WORD!
00:01:22.515 --> 00:01:25.118 line:85% position:43% size:63%
OH, BOO! BOO ON YOU, SIR!
00:01:25.185 --> 00:01:32.158 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start
>> ♪ DO DO DO-DO, THAT'S BANE
>> AND NOW...
00:01:32.225 --> 00:01:33.293 line:85% position:30% size:40%
>> HI! I'M B'DG.
00:01:33.359 --> 00:01:35.895 line:79% position:35% size:50%
I'M A MEMBER OF THE
GREEN LANTERN CORPS.
00:01:35.962 --> 00:01:37.697 line:85% position:50% size:73%
>> CAN YOU BELIEVE IT, FOLKS?
00:01:37.764 --> 00:01:40.934 line:85% position:33% size:43%
HE REALLY EXISTS.
00:01:41.000 --> 00:01:42.035 line:85% position:20% size:20%
>> UH...
00:01:42.101 --> 00:01:44.471 line:79% position:10% size:65% align:start
DO YOU GUYS WANT ME TO SAY
ANYTHING, OR...?
00:01:44.537 --> 00:01:48.107 line:79% position:50% size:80%
>> TUNE IN NEXT TIME FOR ANOTHER
EDITION OF "REAL CHARACTERS FROM
00:01:48.174 --> 00:01:49.509 line:85% position:33% size:43%
THE DC UNIVERSE."
00:01:49.576 --> 00:01:53.179 line:79% position:50% size:73%
>> LOIS, YOU HELPED ME DEFEAT
GENERAL ZOD -- "SUPERMAN II."
00:01:53.246 --> 00:01:54.481 line:85% position:48% size:75%
BUT NOW YOU KNOW I'M SUPERMAN.
00:01:54.547 --> 00:01:56.349 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start
I-I HAVE TO KISS YOU AND MAKE
YOU FORGET.
00:01:56.416 --> 00:01:58.384 line:79% position:15% size:80% align:start
>> WHY WOULD THAT BE ONE OF YOUR
SUPERPOWERS?
00:01:58.451 --> 00:02:00.653 line:79% position:15% size:80% align:start
>> [ Mockingly ] "WHY WOULD THAT
BE BLAH BLAH BLAH?"
00:02:00.720 --> 00:02:02.522 line:79% position:10% size:60% align:start
YOU SHOULD HEAR YOURSELF
SOMETIMES, LOIS.
00:02:02.589 --> 00:02:04.324 line:79% position:28% size:33%
[ SMOOCHES ]
>> HUH? WHAT?
00:02:04.390 --> 00:02:07.627 line:79% position:50% size:68%
WHY AM I STANDING HERE WITH
CLARK KENT WHEN I SHOULD BE
00:02:07.694 --> 00:02:09.429 line:85% position:48% size:75%
CHASING THE SCOOP ON SUPERMAN?
00:02:09.496 --> 00:02:11.998 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start
>> I SHOULD REALLY USE THAT
POWER MORE OFTEN.
00:02:12.065 --> 00:02:13.299 line:85% position:38% size:53%
>> MY BEAUTIFUL HAIR.
00:02:13.366 --> 00:02:15.735 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
I'LL NEVER FORGET HOW YOU TOOK
IT FROM ME, SUPERMAN --
00:02:15.802 --> 00:02:17.070 line:85% position:45% size:70%
Adventure Comics number 271.
00:02:17.136 --> 00:02:18.338 line:85% position:28% size:35%
>> OH, REALLY?
00:02:18.404 --> 00:02:21.875 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
>> SUPERMAN! I'LL DESTROY --
WH-WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
00:02:21.941 --> 00:02:24.511 line:79% position:13% size:80% align:start
>> [ SMOOCHES ]
>> I-I CAN'T REMEMBER WHY I HATE
00:02:24.577 --> 00:02:25.178 line:85% position:15% size:10%
YOU.
00:02:25.245 --> 00:02:27.747 line:85% position:35% size:50%
>> OH, YEAH. I KNOW.
00:02:27.814 --> 00:02:31.284 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
>> ♪ YOU MIGHT WANT TO CLOSE
YOUR EYES ♪
00:02:31.351 --> 00:02:33.653 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start
♪ I'LL RUN MY FINGERS THROUGH
YOUR HAIR ♪
00:02:33.720 --> 00:02:37.457 line:79% position:50% size:65%
♪ AND I'LL KISS YOU, BRO
♪ AND YOU WON'T REMEMBER A
00:02:37.524 --> 00:02:41.895 line:79% position:10% size:60% align:start
THING ♪
♪ DON'T TRY AND RUN AWAY
00:02:41.961 --> 00:02:43.329 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
♪ I'M FASTER THAN A SPEEDING
BULLET ♪
00:02:43.396 --> 00:02:44.564 line:85% position:43% size:63%
>> ANOTHER JOB WELL DONE.
00:02:44.631 --> 00:02:46.032 line:79% position:10% size:65% align:start
>> ♪ AND I'LL CATCH YOU --
[ RECORD SCRATCHES ]
00:02:46.099 --> 00:02:50.169 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
>> EW. I SHOULD HAVE THOUGHT
THIS THROUGH.
00:02:50.236 --> 00:02:54.407 line:85% position:20% size:18%
>> HUH?
00:02:54.474 --> 00:02:57.443 line:85% position:15% size:10%
HUH?
00:02:57.510 --> 00:02:58.344 line:85% position:25% size:30%
>> OH, WELL.
00:02:58.411 --> 00:03:03.683 line:79% position:10% size:38% align:start
[ PANTS UNZIP ]
[ URINATING ]
00:03:03.750 --> 00:03:05.418 line:85% position:15% size:8%
EH!
00:03:05.485 --> 00:03:09.856 line:79% position:25% size:28%
[ FARTING ]
[ GRUNTS ]
00:03:09.923 --> 00:03:14.093 line:79% position:23% size:25%
[ SIGHS ]
[ GRUNTS ]
00:03:14.160 --> 00:03:16.329 line:79% position:10% size:50% align:start
[ SIGHS ]
HEY, HOW'S IT GOING?
00:03:16.396 --> 00:03:21.067 line:79% position:10% size:35% align:start
>> [ MUTTERS ]
OH, COME ON!
00:03:21.134 --> 00:03:23.202 line:79% position:45% size:70%
>> WELCOME, EVERYONE, TO THE
GRAND OPENING OF OUR NEWEST
00:03:23.269 --> 00:03:26.072 line:85% position:50% size:80%
EXHIBIT, THE BLUE STAR OF EGYPT.
00:03:26.139 --> 00:03:27.740 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
[ CROWD GASPS ]
[ SIGHS ] ALL RIGHT, PEOPLE.
00:03:27.807 --> 00:03:29.042 line:85% position:50% size:78%
WE ALL KNOW WHAT'S COMING NEXT.
00:03:29.108 --> 00:03:30.910 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
LET'S SEE IF WE CAN AT LEAST
MAKE IT THROUGH A ROUND OF
00:03:30.977 --> 00:03:32.879 line:79% position:13% size:78% align:start
HORS D'OEUVRES BEFORE THE FIRST
SUPERVILLAIN SHOWS UP.
00:03:32.946 --> 00:03:34.280 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
APPARENTLY, THERE'S A SALMON
BAGEL BITE --
00:03:34.347 --> 00:03:35.415 line:85% position:38% size:53%
>> EVERYBODY, FREEZE!
00:03:35.481 --> 00:03:36.983 line:79% position:10% size:60% align:start
[ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS ]
[ CROWD SCREAMING ]
00:03:37.050 --> 00:03:41.354 line:79% position:50% size:80%
SORRY TO BE SO COLDHEARTED, BUT
MR. FREEZE IS STEALING THAT ICE.
00:03:41.421 --> 00:03:43.990 line:79% position:10% size:58% align:start
[ SCREAMING CONTINUES ]
>> [ CRUNCHES ] MMM!
00:03:44.057 --> 00:03:45.325 line:85% position:50% size:70%
I WAS NOT EXPECTING PAPRIKA.
00:03:45.391 --> 00:03:48.595 line:85% position:48% size:73%
MMM! A-PLUS EFFORT, HONESTLY.
00:03:48.661 --> 00:03:49.929 line:85% position:40% size:58%
>> EVERYONE, CHILL OUT!
00:03:49.996 --> 00:03:52.999 line:79% position:15% size:78% align:start
[ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS ]
OR CAPTAIN COLD WILL PUT YOU ON
00:03:53.066 --> 00:03:53.533 line:85% position:15% size:10%
ICE!
00:03:53.600 --> 00:03:54.634 line:85% position:25% size:30%
OH, COME ON!
00:03:54.701 --> 00:03:56.636 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
>> I THOUGHT WE HAD A SCHEDULE
WORKED OUT!
00:03:56.703 --> 00:03:57.570 line:85% position:30% size:38%
THIS IS MY DAY!
00:03:57.637 --> 00:03:59.038 line:85% position:43% size:65%
>> I HAVE A NEW ASSISTANT.
00:03:59.105 --> 00:04:01.274 line:85% position:45% size:70%
I-I'M STILL BREAKING HIM IN.
00:04:01.341 --> 00:04:02.542 line:85% position:40% size:58%
>> EVERYONE, STAY COOL!
00:04:02.609 --> 00:04:04.877 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start
[ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS ]
IT'S ABOUT TO GET DOWNRIGHT
00:04:04.944 --> 00:04:09.482 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start
BONE-CHILLING IN HERE, THANKS
TO...ICICLE!
00:04:09.549 --> 00:04:11.718 line:79% position:10% size:63% align:start
WOW. I JUST WALKED INTO A
CLUSTER FUCK HUH?
00:04:11.784 --> 00:04:12.919 line:85% position:20% size:18%
>> MMM!
00:04:12.986 --> 00:04:14.721 line:79% position:13% size:78% align:start
YOU GUYS, YOU HAVE TO TRY THESE
SALMON THINGIES.
00:04:14.787 --> 00:04:16.155 line:85% position:40% size:58%
>> FOCUS, CAPTAIN COLD.
00:04:16.222 --> 00:04:19.058 line:79% position:10% size:78% align:start
CLEARLY, THERE'S NOT ROOM FOR
THREE COLD-THEMED VILLAINS WITH
00:04:19.125 --> 00:04:20.426 line:85% position:25% size:30%
FREEZE RAYS.
00:04:20.493 --> 00:04:22.762 line:79% position:48% size:73%
>> I GUESS YOU TWO SNOW JOBS
WILL HAVE TO CHANGE GIMMICKS,
00:04:22.829 --> 00:04:23.496 line:85% position:18% size:13%
THEN.
00:04:23.563 --> 00:04:24.597 line:85% position:40% size:58%
>> IT'S NOT MY GIMMICK!
00:04:24.664 --> 00:04:26.766 line:79% position:10% size:65% align:start
I'LL LITERALLY DIE IN WARM
TEMPERATURES.
00:04:26.833 --> 00:04:29.802 line:79% position:10% size:78% align:start
MY CRYOGENICALLY FROZEN WIFE IS
MY ENTIRE REASON FOR LIVING.
00:04:29.869 --> 00:04:32.639 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
MY NAME IS VICTOR FRIES, FOR
GOD'S SAKE.
00:04:32.705 --> 00:04:35.308 line:79% position:50% size:78%
>> IT'S "FREEZE," BUT YOU SPELL
IT "FRIES," LIKE FRENCH FRIES.
00:04:35.375 --> 00:04:35.908 line:85% position:18% size:15%
WEIRD.
00:04:35.975 --> 00:04:37.210 line:85% position:30% size:38%
>> IT'S GERMAN.
00:04:37.276 --> 00:04:40.113 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start
>> WELL, I AIN'T CHANGING, YA
DICKS.
00:04:40.179 --> 00:04:41.347 line:85% position:35% size:50%
>> EVERYONE, FREEZE!
00:04:41.414 --> 00:04:42.615 line:85% position:35% size:50%
OH, FOR FUCK'S SAKE!
00:04:42.682 --> 00:04:45.284 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start
>> OHH! I COMPLETELY FORGOT
ABOUT CHILLBLAINE.
00:04:45.351 --> 00:04:46.786 line:85% position:43% size:65%
>> YOU AND AMERICA, BUDDY.
00:04:46.853 --> 00:04:50.123 line:79% position:15% size:80% align:start
>> IT TOOK ME SIX YEARS OF
RESEARCH TO BUILD MY FREEZE RAY.
00:04:50.189 --> 00:04:52.925 line:79% position:15% size:78% align:start
HOW DO YOU HIGH-SCHOOL DROPOUTS
KEEP MAKING THEM?
00:04:52.992 --> 00:04:56.562 line:79% position:50% size:80%
ARE THEY AS EASY TO BUILD AS HAM
RADIOS AND I'M JUST AN ASSHOLE?!
00:04:56.629 --> 00:04:59.699 line:79% position:13% size:78% align:start
>> UH, GUYS, WE'VE DEMOLISHED A
LOT OF LOAD-BEARING WALLS IN
00:04:59.766 --> 00:05:01.067 line:85% position:18% size:13%
HERE.
00:05:01.134 --> 00:05:03.670 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
>> WELL, THOSE VILLAINS ARE
GOING TO THE COOLER, THANKS TO
00:05:03.736 --> 00:05:08.007 line:79% position:10% size:65% align:start
ICE AND HER AMAZING FREEZE
POWERS.
00:05:08.074 --> 00:05:10.476 line:79% position:10% size:55% align:start
[ SIREN CHIRPS, DIES ]
COOL!
00:05:10.543 --> 00:05:13.279 line:79% position:13% size:78% align:start
>> I'M GLAD YOU GUYS COULD COME
ALL THE WAY TO EARTH-C.
00:05:13.346 --> 00:05:16.215 line:79% position:13% size:78% align:start
>> ME AND CAPTAIN CARROT DIDN'T
SEE EYE TO EYE ON A LOT OF
00:05:16.282 --> 00:05:18.584 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
THINGS, BUT NO ONE DESERVED TO
DIE LIKE THAT.
00:05:18.651 --> 00:05:21.487 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start
>> I NEVER MET THE CAPTAIN OR
HIS ZOO CREW, BUT SINCE YOU
00:05:21.554 --> 00:05:27.760 line:79% position:10% size:78% align:start
VOUCHED FOR HIM, I'M GLAD TO BE
HERE IN THEIR TIME OF NEED.
00:05:27.827 --> 00:05:32.165 line:79% position:10% size:65% align:start
[ CAR DOOR OPENS, CLOSES ]
>> [ GIGGLING ]
00:05:32.231 --> 00:05:34.434 line:79% position:10% size:80% align:start
WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME THEY LOOK
LIKE CARTOONS?
00:05:34.500 --> 00:05:35.968 line:85% position:18% size:13%
WAIT.
00:05:36.035 --> 00:05:38.604 line:79% position:10% size:43% align:start
[ CLEARS THROAT ]
I'M GOOD.
00:05:38.671 --> 00:05:41.507 line:79% position:10% size:48% align:start
[ LAUGHS ]
DAMN IT! I'M SORRY.
00:05:41.574 --> 00:05:43.409 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
>> IF YOU CAN'T KEEP IT
TOGETHER, YOU NEED TO LEAVE.
00:05:43.476 --> 00:05:44.677 line:85% position:33% size:45%
>> I KNOW. I KNOW.
00:05:44.744 --> 00:05:47.814 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
FOR THE LOVE OF --
IT'S A TURTLE WEARING GOGGLES!
00:05:47.880 --> 00:05:49.248 line:85% position:38% size:53%
I'M SORRY. I'M SORRY.
00:05:49.315 --> 00:05:52.685 line:79% position:10% size:53% align:start
[ TAPS PLAYS ]
[ STIFLING LAUGHTER ]
00:05:52.752 --> 00:05:57.757 line:79% position:10% size:25% align:start
[ GRUNTS ]
I'M S--
00:05:57.824 --> 00:06:00.126 line:79% position:10% size:48% align:start
I'M SOR--
IT'S JUST...THAT...
00:06:00.193 --> 00:06:01.494 line:85% position:30% size:40%
HE LOOKS SO SAD.
00:06:01.561 --> 00:06:04.864 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
>> [ SNORTS ]
>> [ Laughing ] I CAN'T -- I
00:06:04.931 --> 00:06:06.466 line:85% position:35% size:48%
CAN'T -- I'M SORRY.
00:06:06.532 --> 00:06:09.335 line:85% position:20% size:20%
I CAN'T!
00:06:09.402 --> 00:06:11.104 line:79% position:10% size:58% align:start
>> YOUR FRIEND WAS VERY
INAPPROPRIATE.
00:06:11.170 --> 00:06:12.705 line:79% position:10% size:45% align:start
>> WE'RE SO SORRY,
LITTLE CHEESE.
00:06:12.772 --> 00:06:14.240 line:85% position:50% size:75%
>> [ LAUGHS ] "LITTLE CHEESE."
00:06:14.307 --> 00:06:16.642 line:79% position:45% size:68%
>> I JUST DON'T SEE HOW YOU
COULD LET IT GET THIS BAD.
00:06:16.709 --> 00:06:17.877 line:85% position:45% size:70%
>> IT'S A SWAMP THING, BABY.
00:06:17.944 --> 00:06:19.245 line:85% position:40% size:60%
YOU WOULDN'T UNDERSTAND.
00:06:19.312 --> 00:06:20.680 line:85% position:20% size:18%
>> AHH.
00:06:20.747 --> 00:06:23.282 line:79% position:15% size:80% align:start
BANE BROKE MY BACK, BUT YEARS OF
TRAINING ALLOWED ME TO HEAL IN
00:06:23.349 --> 00:06:24.484 line:85% position:25% size:30%
RECORD TIME.
00:06:24.550 --> 00:06:27.019 line:79% position:18% size:78% align:start
NOW LET'S SEE WHAT THE JOKER --
OH, MY GOD, NO!
00:06:27.086 --> 00:06:28.221 line:79% position:10% size:25% align:start
[ CRACK! ]
AAH!
00:06:28.287 --> 00:06:29.989 line:85% position:48% size:75%
LIKE A STRING OF FIRECRACKERS!
00:06:30.056 --> 00:06:31.357 line:85% position:30% size:40%
MY FUCKING BACK!
00:06:31.424 --> 00:06:34.360 line:79% position:45% size:70%
I FELT THE SOLES OF MY FEET
TOUCH THE BACK OF MY HEAD ON
00:06:34.427 --> 00:06:35.528 line:85% position:23% size:23%
THAT ONE!
00:06:35.595 --> 00:06:41.267 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start
>> ♪ DO DO DO-DO, THAT'S BANE
>> AND NOW...
00:06:41.334 --> 00:06:43.069 line:85% position:50% size:73%
>> HEY, THERE. I'M FIRESTORM.
00:06:43.136 --> 00:06:44.871 line:85% position:50% size:73%
>> CAN YOU BELIEVE IT, FOLKS?
00:06:44.937 --> 00:06:46.839 line:85% position:50% size:80%
TAKE A GOOD LOOK AT THIS DOUCHE!
00:06:46.906 --> 00:06:49.675 line:85% position:35% size:48%
>> I'M...FIRESTORM.
00:06:49.742 --> 00:06:50.710 line:85% position:30% size:40%
THE NUCLEAR MAN.
00:06:50.777 --> 00:06:52.311 line:85% position:45% size:70%
I WAS IN THE JUSTICE LEAGUE.
00:06:52.378 --> 00:06:54.580 line:79% position:10% size:78% align:start
>> HIS HAIR IS ACTUALLY MADE OF
FIRE.
00:06:54.647 --> 00:06:57.550 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start
BET HE BLOWS THROUGH HIS COMB
BUDGET PRETTY QUICKLY.
00:06:57.617 --> 00:06:59.085 line:85% position:43% size:65%
>> BUT I'M REALLY POPULAR.
00:06:59.152 --> 00:07:02.121 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
>> WE'LL BE BACK NEXT TIME FOR
"REAL CHARACTERS OF THE DC
00:07:02.188 --> 00:07:03.089 line:85% position:23% size:25%
UNIVERSE."
00:07:03.156 --> 00:07:04.524 line:79% position:10% size:65% align:start
>> WHAT ARE WE DOING HERE,
LANTERN?
00:07:04.590 --> 00:07:05.525 line:85% position:38% size:53%
>> WHAT'S THE MATTER?
00:07:05.591 --> 00:07:06.959 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start
YOU A LITTLE RUSTY WITH THE
LADIES?
00:07:07.026 --> 00:07:10.797 line:79% position:50% size:78%
>> HA! IF ANYONE'S GONNA SCORE
TONIGHT, IT'S THE MAN OF STEEL.
00:07:10.863 --> 00:07:13.633 line:79% position:50% size:70%
>> HAVEN'T YOU BEEN COURTING
LOIS LANE FOR LIKE 15 YEARS?
00:07:13.699 --> 00:07:14.767 line:85% position:38% size:53%
>> DO YOU EVER SCORE?
00:07:14.834 --> 00:07:17.203 line:85% position:35% size:48%
>> WATCH AND LEARN.
00:07:17.270 --> 00:07:19.939 line:79% position:50% size:78%
"HEY, LADIES, YOU LOOK LIKE YOU
COULD USE A NON-THREATENING GUY
00:07:20.006 --> 00:07:21.841 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
PAL WHO WILL NEVER PUSH YOUR
BOUNDARIES."
00:07:21.908 --> 00:07:24.377 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
>> "AND WHILE YOU'RE AT IT,
COULD YOU COSIGN MY LOAN FOR A
00:07:24.443 --> 00:07:26.078 line:79% position:10% size:50% align:start
LATE MODEL COROLLA?"
>> "GOT A PEN?"
00:07:26.145 --> 00:07:30.650 line:79% position:10% size:63% align:start
[ BOTH LAUGH ]
>> [ Laughing ] OH! OUCH!
00:07:30.716 --> 00:07:33.052 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
>> NOT EVEN I COULD GET TO THE
FRIEND ZONE THAT FAST.
00:07:33.119 --> 00:07:35.888 line:79% position:50% size:78%
>> CLASS IS IN SESSION, PEOPLE,
AS SOON AS I GET THIS SUIT OFF.
00:07:35.955 --> 00:07:37.156 line:85% position:45% size:70%
>> HOLD ON THERE, MONEYBAGS.
00:07:37.223 --> 00:07:38.457 line:85% position:50% size:70%
YOU GOT TO DO IT IN COSTUME.
00:07:38.524 --> 00:07:39.659 line:85% position:43% size:65%
>> YEAH, THAT'S THE RULES.
00:07:39.725 --> 00:07:40.827 line:85% position:48% size:73%
WE ALL HAVE TO BE IN COSTUME.
00:07:40.893 --> 00:07:41.661 line:85% position:20% size:20%
>> WHA?!
00:07:41.727 --> 00:07:43.563 line:85% position:50% size:73%
I'M DRESSED LIKE A GIANT BAT!
00:07:43.629 --> 00:07:44.530 line:85% position:35% size:48%
WELL FUCK YOU GUYS.
00:07:44.597 --> 00:07:45.832 line:85% position:35% size:48%
I'M GETTING WASTED.
00:07:45.898 --> 00:07:48.568 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
>> GOT A COUPLE PIÑA COLADAS
HERE, JUST FOR THE LADIES.
00:07:48.634 --> 00:07:50.970 line:79% position:10% size:80% align:start
>> LOOKS LIKE YOU COULD USE SOME
JUST FOR MEN.
00:07:51.037 --> 00:07:53.339 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
[ BOTH LAUGH ]
>> AND YOU BITCHES CAN PAY FOR
00:07:53.406 --> 00:07:56.542 line:85% position:30% size:40%
YOUR OWN DRINKS.
00:07:56.609 --> 00:07:59.545 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start
>> NAME'S AQUAMAN, AND I KNOW
HOW TO TALK TO TUNA.
00:07:59.612 --> 00:08:01.547 line:79% position:25% size:30%
[ BABBLING ]
[ WARBLE! ]
00:08:01.614 --> 00:08:02.715 line:85% position:38% size:53%
M-MARTIAN MANHUNTER?!
00:08:02.782 --> 00:08:03.883 line:85% position:35% size:50%
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!
00:08:03.950 --> 00:08:06.285 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
>> I HAVE A LIFE OUTSIDE THE
TEAM, YOU KNOW.
00:08:06.352 --> 00:08:08.187 line:79% position:10% size:50% align:start
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> YOU'RE THE WORST.
00:08:08.254 --> 00:08:09.655 line:85% position:45% size:68%
>> AQUAMAN GOT MANHUNTER'd!
00:08:09.722 --> 00:08:10.823 line:85% position:38% size:53%
>> YOU ARE THE WORST.
00:08:10.890 --> 00:08:11.924 line:85% position:35% size:48%
>> I'M OUT OF HERE.
00:08:11.991 --> 00:08:13.860 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start
THERE'S PLENTY OF FISH IN THE
SEA!
00:08:13.926 --> 00:08:16.329 line:79% position:10% size:63% align:start
>> DID HE MEAN THAT
METAPHORICALLY OR, UH...?
00:08:16.395 --> 00:08:17.864 line:79% position:30% size:38%
>> [ BABBLES ]
>> [ CHITTERS ]
00:08:17.930 --> 00:08:19.832 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
>> [ SCOFFS ]
I DO NOT JUST CALL WHEN I'VE
00:08:19.899 --> 00:08:20.733 line:85% position:28% size:35%
BEEN DRINKING.
00:08:20.800 --> 00:08:23.336 line:79% position:30% size:38%
>> [ CHITTERS ]
>> [ BABBLES ]
00:08:23.402 --> 00:08:26.005 line:79% position:10% size:50% align:start
>> MEANWHILE, AT THE
LEGION OF DOOM...
00:08:26.072 --> 00:08:29.942 line:79% position:50% size:78%
>> AND THIS NEW PLAN WILL CRUSH
THE JUSTICE LEAGUE ONCE AND FOR
00:08:30.009 --> 00:08:31.410 line:85% position:15% size:10%
ALL.
00:08:31.477 --> 00:08:34.380 line:79% position:50% size:78%
BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY, IT'S TIME
TO DRAW NAMES FOR SECRET SANTA!
00:08:34.447 --> 00:08:37.016 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start
[ VILLAINS GROAN ]
IT'S TEAM-BUILDING, PEOPLE.
00:08:37.083 --> 00:08:38.451 line:85% position:45% size:70%
>> SHAKE IT UP. SHAKE IT UP.
00:08:38.517 --> 00:08:39.185 line:85% position:20% size:18%
MM-HMM.
00:08:39.252 --> 00:08:40.519 line:85% position:40% size:58%
>> I GOT LEONARD SNART.
00:08:40.586 --> 00:08:41.721 line:85% position:35% size:50%
WHO'S LEONARD SNART?
00:08:41.787 --> 00:08:44.290 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start
IS HE THE KID IN THE MAILROOM
WITH THE B.O.?
00:08:44.357 --> 00:08:47.393 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start
EVERY DAY, I'M LIKE, "I SMELL
THE MAIL COMING," AND SURE
00:08:47.460 --> 00:08:49.328 line:79% position:10% size:53% align:start
ENOUGH --
>> I'M LEONARD SNART.
00:08:49.395 --> 00:08:49.996 line:85% position:18% size:15%
>> AH!
00:08:50.062 --> 00:08:52.331 line:85% position:35% size:48%
HOW COULD I FORGET?
00:08:52.398 --> 00:08:55.167 line:79% position:10% size:65% align:start
I THINK THAT KID'S NAME IS
GLENN.
00:08:55.234 --> 00:08:58.471 line:79% position:13% size:80% align:start
>> OH, SOMEBODY'S GOING TO GET A
BIG SURPRISE!
00:08:58.537 --> 00:09:01.040 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
[ LAUGHS ]
>> OH, AND NEW RULE THIS YEAR,
00:09:01.107 --> 00:09:02.675 line:85% position:50% size:78%
EVERYBODY -- NO EXPLODING TOYS.
00:09:02.742 --> 00:09:03.876 line:85% position:20% size:18%
>> HEY!
00:09:03.943 --> 00:09:06.445 line:79% position:10% size:65% align:start
I'M LITERALLY THE ONLY ONE
AFFECTED BY THAT RULE!
00:09:06.512 --> 00:09:09.849 line:79% position:48% size:73%
>> I STILL HAVE A SCAR IN MY
FOREHEAD FROM CHRISTMAS 2004,
00:09:09.916 --> 00:09:11.017 line:85% position:33% size:45%
YOU DUMB BUTTHOLE.
00:09:11.083 --> 00:09:13.286 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start
>> IT'S -- IT'S HOW I EXPRESS
LOVE.
00:09:13.352 --> 00:09:14.787 line:85% position:48% size:73%
>> HAS EVERYONE DRAWN A NAME?
00:09:14.854 --> 00:09:16.188 line:79% position:10% size:30% align:start
[ SNIFFS ]
OH. OH, GOD!
00:09:16.255 --> 00:09:18.190 line:79% position:10% size:53% align:start
WH-WHAT SMELLS LIKE A
TURD-LOVER'S PIZZA?
00:09:18.257 --> 00:09:19.225 line:85% position:28% size:33%
>> HEY, GUYS.
00:09:19.292 --> 00:09:21.260 line:79% position:18% size:80% align:start
WE DOING SECRET SANTA AGAIN THIS
YEAR?
00:09:21.327 --> 00:09:25.364 line:79% position:10% size:65% align:start
[ VILLAINS MUMBLE ]
OH! NONCOMMITTAL MUMBLING.
00:09:25.431 --> 00:09:28.567 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
YEAH, IT'S THE GIFT THAT KEEPS
ON GIVING.
00:09:28.634 --> 00:09:35.041 line:79% position:20% size:80% align:start
>> [ COUGHS ]
>> I HAVE A GLANDULAR CONDITION,
00:09:35.107 --> 00:09:35.775 line:85% position:23% size:23%
YOU GUYS!
00:09:35.841 --> 00:09:37.009 line:85% position:35% size:48%
IT IS NOT MY FAULT!
00:09:37.076 --> 00:09:38.444 line:85% position:40% size:58%
YOU THINK I DON'T TRY?!
00:09:38.511 --> 00:09:41.113 line:85% position:35% size:48%
I SHOWER EVERY DAY!
00:09:41.180 --> 00:09:47.153 line:79% position:10% size:48% align:start
[ SNIFFLES ]
I SHOWER EVERY DAY!
00:09:47.219 --> 00:09:49.021 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start
[ WHEELS SQUEAKING ]
>> LEARN MORE ABOUT GLENN AND
00:09:54.327 --> 00:09:56.796 line:79% position:48% size:73%
HIS BATTLE AGAINST BODY ODOR,
RIGHT AFTER THESE COMMERCIAL
00:09:56.862 --> 00:09:58.664 line:85% position:23% size:23%
MESSAGES.
00:10:03.336 --> 00:10:06.038 line:79% position:50% size:78%
ANY WAY THAT MAKES SENSE OF IT,
SO I'LL JUST GIVE YOU THE FACTS
00:10:06.105 --> 00:10:07.273 line:85% position:30% size:38%
AS I HAVE THEM.
00:10:07.340 --> 00:10:10.776 line:79% position:10% size:78% align:start
GLENN KILLED HIMSELF DURING THE
COMMERCIAL BREAK.
00:10:10.843 --> 00:10:11.577 line:85% position:23% size:25%
>> MY GOD!
00:10:11.644 --> 00:10:12.745 line:85% position:30% size:38%
WHAT WAS THAT?!
00:10:12.812 --> 00:10:16.782 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
>> I DON'T KNOW, BUT I'LL FIND
OUT, MR. JORDAN.
00:10:16.849 --> 00:10:20.753 line:79% position:10% size:63% align:start
>> [ MUNCHES ]
>> WHOA! THIS IS SO COOL!
00:10:20.820 --> 00:10:23.656 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
NOT QUITE "INDEPENDENCE DAY"
COOL, BUT MUCH COOLER THAN
00:10:23.723 --> 00:10:25.124 line:85% position:43% size:65%
"BATTLE LOS ANGELES" COOL.
00:10:25.191 --> 00:10:28.361 line:79% position:50% size:80%
IF "BATTLE LOS ANGELES" WAS ZERO
COOL AND "INDEPENDENCE DAY" WAS
00:10:28.427 --> 00:10:30.696 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start
10 COOL, THEN THIS WOULD BE
ABOUT A 7 COOL!
00:10:30.763 --> 00:10:31.797 line:85% position:35% size:48%
>> I AM ABIN SUR...
00:10:31.864 --> 00:10:33.265 line:85% position:33% size:43%
>> IT'S A 9 COOL.
00:10:33.332 --> 00:10:34.767 line:79% position:10% size:50% align:start
>> ...FROM THE
GREEN LANTERN CORPS.
00:10:34.834 --> 00:10:35.701 line:85% position:38% size:55%
>> EXPOSITION! YIPPEE!
00:10:35.768 --> 00:10:36.936 line:85% position:50% size:78%
>> THE RING, THE COSMIC RING...
00:10:37.003 --> 00:10:37.837 line:85% position:50% size:70%
>> OH, MY GOSH! OH, MY GOSH!
00:10:37.903 --> 00:10:38.938 line:85% position:25% size:30%
OH, MY GOSH!
00:10:39.005 --> 00:10:40.339 line:79% position:13% size:78% align:start
>> ...HAS CHOSEN YOU AS ITS NEW
MASTER...
00:10:40.406 --> 00:10:41.474 line:85% position:50% size:70%
>> OH, MY GOSH! OH, MY GOSH!
00:10:41.540 --> 00:10:43.676 line:85% position:35% size:48%
>> ...HAL JORDAN...
00:10:43.743 --> 00:10:46.245 line:79% position:13% size:80% align:start
>> HMM. LAST WORDS SPOKEN IN HIS
NATIVE TONGUE.
00:10:46.312 --> 00:10:49.315 line:79% position:18% size:80% align:start
WE'LL TRAGICALLY NEVER KNOW WHAT
"HAL JORDAN" MEANS IN ENGLISH.
00:10:49.382 --> 00:10:50.549 line:85% position:33% size:43%
WHAT'S THIS MEAN?
00:10:50.616 --> 00:10:53.019 line:79% position:15% size:80% align:start
IT'S GLOWING, AND IT SEEMS TO BE
TAKING OVER MY --
00:10:53.085 --> 00:10:53.819 line:85% position:25% size:30%
OH, MY GOSH!
00:10:53.886 --> 00:10:59.925 line:79% position:10% size:33% align:start
OH, MY --
[ SCREAMING ]
00:10:59.992 --> 00:11:01.227 line:85% position:45% size:68%
>> HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY.
00:11:01.293 --> 00:11:02.495 line:85% position:25% size:28%
OKAY. OKAY.
00:11:02.561 --> 00:11:04.230 line:85% position:48% size:75%
CAN YOU PLEASE STOP SCREAMING?
00:11:04.296 --> 00:11:06.866 line:79% position:10% size:55% align:start
>> [ SCREAMING STOPS ]
>> UGH. THANK YOU.
00:11:06.932 --> 00:11:08.100 line:85% position:18% size:13%
PHEW!
00:11:08.167 --> 00:11:11.604 line:79% position:13% size:78% align:start
[ CLEARS THROAT ]
YOU WILL BE TRAINED TO USE YOUR
00:11:11.670 --> 00:11:13.005 line:85% position:30% size:40%
RING BY KILOWOG.
00:11:13.072 --> 00:11:15.508 line:79% position:10% size:40% align:start
>> [ GROWLS ]
>> [ SCREAMING ]
00:11:15.574 --> 00:11:18.077 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
>> OOH, IT'S LIKE SCRATCHING A
CHALKBOARD AGAINST ANOTHER
00:11:18.144 --> 00:11:19.378 line:85% position:25% size:28%
CHALKBOARD.
00:11:19.445 --> 00:11:21.747 line:79% position:13% size:80% align:start
>> [ SCREAMING STOPS ]
>> IF YOU ARE ATTACKED, THE RING
00:11:21.814 --> 00:11:26.318 line:79% position:10% size:78% align:start
WILL RESPOND TO YOUR THOUGHTS
AND IMAGINATION TO PROTECT YOU.
00:11:26.385 --> 00:11:27.286 line:85% position:18% size:15%
BEGIN!
00:11:27.353 --> 00:11:30.489 line:79% position:10% size:53% align:start
[ WARBLE! ]
>> COOL! I DODGED IT!
00:11:30.556 --> 00:11:32.792 line:85% position:43% size:63%
PROTECT ME, SELENA GOMEZ!
00:11:32.858 --> 00:11:35.594 line:85% position:50% size:78%
>> I MEANT WEAPONS, YOU POOZER!
00:11:35.661 --> 00:11:36.996 line:85% position:28% size:33%
HEY, NOW! OW!
00:11:37.063 --> 00:11:37.763 line:85% position:18% size:13%
WAAH!
00:11:37.830 --> 00:11:42.768 line:79% position:10% size:28% align:start
[ WARBLE! ]
>> OHH!
00:11:42.835 --> 00:11:43.903 line:85% position:15% size:10%
OHH!
00:11:43.969 --> 00:11:47.440 line:79% position:25% size:28%
[ WARBLE! ]
[ WARBLE! ]
00:11:47.506 --> 00:11:49.942 line:85% position:15% size:10%
OHH!
00:11:50.009 --> 00:11:53.112 line:79% position:10% size:80% align:start
>> I'M NOT SURE THAT THE
EARTHLINGS ARE WORTHY OF A RING.
00:11:53.179 --> 00:11:54.213 line:85% position:33% size:45%
>> MAKE THEM KISS.
00:11:54.280 --> 00:11:55.915 line:85% position:50% size:78%
>> WHY, YES, IT IS HOT IN HERE!
00:11:55.981 --> 00:11:59.418 line:79% position:18% size:80% align:start
>> I JUST HOPE THEY GAVE
ABIN SUR THE BURIAL HE DESERVED.
00:11:59.485 --> 00:12:06.025 line:79% position:10% size:45% align:start
[ BEARS GROWLING ]
>> [ ROARS ]
00:12:06.092 --> 00:12:08.928 line:79% position:50% size:73%
>> YOUR ENHANCED STRENGTH AND
KRYPTONITE LASERS MAKE YOU A
00:12:08.994 --> 00:12:12.465 line:79% position:10% size:60% align:start
MATCH FOR EVEN SUPERMAN,
MR. LUTHOR.
00:12:12.531 --> 00:12:13.666 line:85% position:20% size:18%
>> YES.
00:12:13.732 --> 00:12:15.267 line:85% position:33% size:45%
A FLAWLESS DESIGN.
00:12:15.334 --> 00:12:16.435 line:85% position:15% size:8%
OW!
00:12:16.502 --> 00:12:18.471 line:79% position:13% size:80% align:start
>> TYLER, I TOLD YOU NOT TO PLAY
BALL IN HERE!
00:12:18.537 --> 00:12:19.905 line:85% position:43% size:63%
I'M SO SORRY, MR. LUTHOR.
00:12:19.972 --> 00:12:21.440 line:85% position:45% size:68%
I-IT'S MY DAY TO WATCH HIM.
00:12:21.507 --> 00:12:25.911 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
>> JUST STOP TALKING FOR ONE
SECOND!
00:12:25.978 --> 00:12:30.116 line:85% position:40% size:58%
>> HA HA! THAT TICKLES!
00:12:30.182 --> 00:12:34.520 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start
WHAT, UH -- WHAT'S GOING ON
HERE?
00:12:34.587 --> 00:12:37.523 line:79% position:50% size:78%
>> OKAY, JUST TO BE COMPLETELY
CLEAR, ALL WE'RE GONNA DO IS GO
00:12:37.590 --> 00:12:40.493 line:79% position:10% size:80% align:start
OVER TO THE HALL OF JUSTICE,
PLANT A NEGA-BOMB, AND KILL THEM
00:12:40.559 --> 00:12:41.193 line:85% position:25% size:30%
ALL AT ONCE.
00:12:41.260 --> 00:12:41.927 line:85% position:33% size:43%
THAT'S IT, RIGHT?
00:12:41.994 --> 00:12:43.362 line:85% position:25% size:28%
>> EXACTLY.
00:12:43.429 --> 00:12:45.764 line:79% position:10% size:80% align:start
AND WE'RE SNEAKING OVER AT NIGHT
WHEN IT'S DARK, LIKE SINESTRO
00:12:45.831 --> 00:12:46.432 line:85% position:18% size:13%
SAID.
00:12:46.499 --> 00:12:47.900 line:85% position:35% size:50%
GREAT IDEA, 'NESTRO.
00:12:47.967 --> 00:12:51.070 line:79% position:50% size:80%
>> AND IT NEVER HURTS TO LEAVE A
FEW RIDDLES WITH EMBEDDED CLUES
00:12:51.137 --> 00:12:52.304 line:85% position:50% size:65%
ON HOW TO DEFUSE THE BOMB.
00:12:52.371 --> 00:12:53.706 line:85% position:25% size:30%
RIGHT, GANG?
00:12:53.772 --> 00:12:56.175 line:79% position:10% size:78% align:start
>> LOOK, EDDIE, WE'RE NOT DOING
THE "RIDDLE" THING ANYMORE.
00:12:56.242 --> 00:12:59.145 line:79% position:10% size:78% align:start
YOU DON'T HAVE TO GET YOUR DICK
PRINTS OVER EVERYTHING WE DO.
00:12:59.211 --> 00:13:03.782 line:79% position:10% size:78% align:start
>> BUT WITHOUT MY RIDDLES, I
MIGHT AS WELL NOT EVEN SHOW UP.
00:13:03.849 --> 00:13:05.151 line:85% position:18% size:13%
FINE!
00:13:05.217 --> 00:13:08.721 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
RIDDLE ME THIS -- WHICH LOSERS
ARE GONNA BE TOTALLY JEALOUS
00:13:08.787 --> 00:13:12.458 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start
WHEN I DEFEAT THE JLA WITHOUT
THEM?
00:13:12.525 --> 00:13:17.396 line:85% position:28% size:35%
IT'S YOU GUYS!
00:13:17.463 --> 00:13:20.466 line:79% position:13% size:80% align:start
>> "RIDDLE ME THIS -- WHO IS THE
PUNCTUATION POSSE?"
00:13:20.533 --> 00:13:22.835 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
>> PERHAPS I CAN ANSWER YOUR
QUESTION!
00:13:22.902 --> 00:13:25.304 line:79% position:10% size:60% align:start
[ SINISTER MUSIC PLAYS ]
>> THE RIDDLER!
00:13:25.371 --> 00:13:27.072 line:85% position:48% size:75%
>> INTENSE EMOTION, DO I HEAR?
00:13:27.139 --> 00:13:28.941 line:85% position:50% size:80%
THEN THE EXCLAIMER MUST BE NEAR.
00:13:29.008 --> 00:13:30.075 line:85% position:33% size:43%
>> THE EXCLAIMER?
00:13:30.142 --> 00:13:32.678 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start
WAIT. CAN WE HIT "PAUSE" HERE
FOR A SECOND?
00:13:32.745 --> 00:13:34.380 line:85% position:48% size:73%
>> PAUSING IS MY GAME, FLASH.
00:13:34.446 --> 00:13:35.748 line:85% position:43% size:63%
AND THE COMMA IS MY NAME.
00:13:35.814 --> 00:13:36.882 line:85% position:33% size:43%
>> OH, FORGET IT!
00:13:36.949 --> 00:13:39.151 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start
[ MUSIC STOPS ]
I'M SHUTTING DOWN THIS TURD
00:13:39.218 --> 00:13:42.154 line:79% position:10% size:65% align:start
FACTORY BEFORE IT GETS ANY
WORSE.
00:13:42.221 --> 00:13:44.390 line:85% position:50% size:78%
>> DID SOMEONE USE A QUOTE YET?
00:13:44.456 --> 00:13:47.259 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
WE CAN'T HEAR JACK SHIT BACK
HERE.
00:13:47.326 --> 00:13:50.729 line:79% position:48% size:75%
>> SO, IF WE JUST TURN OFF THE
LIGHTS WHEN WE LEAVE A ROOM --
00:13:50.796 --> 00:13:53.599 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start
>> WAIT. THEY SAID BANE HAD
CRIPPLED ME FOR LIFE.
00:13:53.666 --> 00:13:56.702 line:79% position:18% size:78% align:start
BUT THAT MONSTER ISN'T GOING TO
OWN ME.
00:13:56.769 --> 00:13:58.571 line:85% position:23% size:23%
I'M BACK.
00:14:03.876 --> 00:14:04.510 line:85% position:25% size:28%
OH, MY GOD!
00:14:04.577 --> 00:14:05.678 line:85% position:38% size:55%
THIS IS NOT HAPPENING!
00:14:05.744 --> 00:14:06.779 line:79% position:10% size:25% align:start
[ CRACK! ]
AAAH!
00:14:06.845 --> 00:14:08.614 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start
WHERE WERE YOU GUYS ON THAT
ONE?!
00:14:08.681 --> 00:14:09.715 line:85% position:35% size:50%
YOU JUST WATCHED IT!
00:14:09.782 --> 00:14:11.116 line:85% position:45% size:68%
THIS IS A WAKING NIGHTMARE!
00:14:11.183 --> 00:14:15.654 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start
>> ♪ DO DO DO-DO, THAT'S BANE
>> BUT COME ON, GUYS.
00:14:15.721 --> 00:14:17.389 line:85% position:45% size:68%
I'VE HAD IT SINCE I WAS 13.
00:14:17.456 --> 00:14:20.492 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start
>> RIDDLE ME THIS,
MIRROR MASTER -- WHAT'S PINK,
00:14:20.559 --> 00:14:22.328 line:85% position:48% size:73%
QUIVERING, AND NEEDS A SHAVE?
00:14:22.394 --> 00:14:25.397 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start
>> TWO THINGS -- SINESTRO AND
SINESTRO'S VAGINA.
00:14:25.464 --> 00:14:26.265 line:85% position:23% size:23%
LET'S GO.
00:14:26.332 --> 00:14:30.469 line:85% position:50% size:78%
>> OKAY, OKAY. I'M GONNA DO IT.
00:14:30.536 --> 00:14:31.203 line:85% position:20% size:18%
>> AAH!
00:14:31.270 --> 00:14:32.137 line:85% position:40% size:58%
>> AAH! OH, OH, OH, OH!
00:14:32.204 --> 00:14:33.205 line:79% position:10% size:23% align:start
AAH FUCK!
>> OH.
00:14:33.272 --> 00:14:34.173 line:85% position:33% size:45%
>> CALL 911, GUYS.
00:14:34.240 --> 00:14:35.808 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start
>> OH, I'M NOT SO GOOD WITH
BLOOD.
00:14:35.874 --> 00:14:37.610 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start
>> GONNA NEED MORE T.P. HERE,
FELLAS.
00:14:37.676 --> 00:14:38.844 line:85% position:43% size:65%
>> UH-OH. I'M OUT OF HERE.
00:14:38.911 --> 00:14:39.612 line:85% position:35% size:50%
>> HELP ME! HELP ME!
00:14:39.678 --> 00:14:40.913 line:85% position:15% size:10%
AAH.
00:14:40.980 --> 00:14:43.882 line:79% position:50% size:68%
>> RIDDLE ME THIS -- WHAT'S
COVERED IN QUESTION MARKS,
00:14:43.949 --> 00:14:46.085 line:85% position:50% size:80%
SNIFFS GLUE, AND WAS NEVER HERE?
00:14:52.191 --> 00:14:54.026 line:79% position:10% size:50% align:start
>> MEANWHILE, AT THE
HALL OF JUSTICE...
00:14:54.093 --> 00:14:56.562 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
>> MAYBE THE CRUISE SHIPS
WOULDN'T SINK IF THEY DIDN'T
00:14:56.629 --> 00:14:59.064 line:79% position:15% size:78% align:start
SHOVE A QUARTER-TON OF
SELF-LOATHING INTO EVERY CABIN.
00:14:59.131 --> 00:15:00.866 line:79% position:10% size:60% align:start
>> HOW DO THEY EVEN WIPE
THEMSELVES?
00:15:00.933 --> 00:15:03.369 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
>> OOH, SOMEONE SAY, "CRUISE
SHIP," LIKE IN THE OCEAN?
00:15:03.435 --> 00:15:04.536 line:85% position:43% size:63%
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME?
00:15:04.603 --> 00:15:06.605 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
>> OH, TO TELL THE FISH TO GET
OUT OF THE WAY?
00:15:06.672 --> 00:15:07.740 line:85% position:40% size:60%
NO, THEY FIGURED IT OUT.
00:15:07.806 --> 00:15:09.341 line:79% position:10% size:48% align:start
>> [ LAUGHS ]
NICE ONE, SUPERMAN.
00:15:09.408 --> 00:15:10.643 line:85% position:48% size:73%
>> OH, SORRY, GUYS. BAD NEWS.
00:15:10.709 --> 00:15:12.678 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
>> [ GASPING ]
>> THE TOILET'S STILL CLOGGED.
00:15:12.745 --> 00:15:15.281 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
>> THAT WAS AN ANCIENT RELIC
PASSED DOWN FROM MY ANCESTORS!
00:15:15.347 --> 00:15:17.783 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
>> WELL, YOUR ANCESTORS DIDN'T
KNOW CRAP ABOUT PLUMBING.
00:15:17.850 --> 00:15:19.785 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
>> BUT I'VE GOT FRIENDS COMING
OVER TONIGHT!
00:15:19.852 --> 00:15:21.887 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
>> THESE LOBSTERS WALKED RIGHT
UP TO THE DOOR.
00:15:21.954 --> 00:15:22.621 line:85% position:28% size:35%
ANYONE HUNGRY?
00:15:22.688 --> 00:15:25.591 line:85% position:40% size:60%
>> THE JOHNSONS! OH, NO!
00:15:25.658 --> 00:15:28.160 line:85% position:48% size:73%
ED JOHNSON PERFORMED MY BRIS!
00:15:28.227 --> 00:15:30.829 line:85% position:40% size:58%
>> AQUAMAN, I HEAR YOU.
00:15:30.896 --> 00:15:32.331 line:85% position:48% size:75%
CAN WE STILL EAT THE LOBSTERS?
00:15:32.398 --> 00:15:33.565 line:85% position:45% size:70%
>> SOMEBODY SAID, "LOBSTER"?
00:15:33.632 --> 00:15:34.667 line:85% position:28% size:33%
>> THAT'S IT!
00:15:34.733 --> 00:15:36.769 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
YOU TREAT ME LIKE I'M NOT EVEN
ON THE TEAM!
00:15:36.835 --> 00:15:39.538 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
EVERY DAY, IT'S "AQUA LOSER"
THIS AND "AQUA PUSS" THAT!
00:15:39.605 --> 00:15:40.406 line:85% position:35% size:50%
>> CAREFUL, AQUAMAN.
00:15:40.472 --> 00:15:41.573 line:85% position:25% size:30%
FLOOR'S WET.
00:15:41.640 --> 00:15:43.709 line:79% position:20% size:78% align:start
>> I AM THE KING OF THE FUCKING
OCEAN, CYBORG!
00:15:43.776 --> 00:15:46.078 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
DO YOU THINK I'VE NEVER SEEN A
PUDDLE BEFORE?!
00:15:46.145 --> 00:15:51.050 line:79% position:10% size:50% align:start
[ SQUEAK! THUD! ]
OW! OW! MY TAILBONE!
00:15:51.116 --> 00:15:55.154 line:85% position:43% size:65%
[ Sobbing ] M-MY TAILBONE.
00:15:55.220 --> 00:15:56.121 line:85% position:25% size:28%
OW, PLEASE.
00:15:56.188 --> 00:15:57.389 line:85% position:30% size:40%
NEED A HOSPITAL.
00:15:57.456 --> 00:15:59.391 line:85% position:45% size:70%
>> JUST USE YOUR AquaMobile.
00:15:59.458 --> 00:16:02.094 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
>> HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO RIDE A
SEA-DOO?
00:16:02.161 --> 00:16:06.865 line:79% position:10% size:58% align:start
[ DOOR CLOSES ]
[ SOBBING ] THAT IS IT.
00:16:06.932 --> 00:16:08.434 line:85% position:25% size:28%
THAT IS IT!
00:16:08.500 --> 00:16:12.037 line:85% position:28% size:33%
>> AND NOW...
00:16:12.104 --> 00:16:13.238 line:85% position:38% size:53%
>> WHY, HELLO, THERE.
00:16:13.305 --> 00:16:14.707 line:85% position:28% size:35%
I'M MR. BANJO.
00:16:14.773 --> 00:16:18.310 line:79% position:50% size:80%
I'LL STEAL AMERICA'S SECRETS AND
SEND THEM TO FOREIGN ENEMIES BY
00:16:18.377 --> 00:16:20.879 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
PLAYING MORSE CODE ON MY BANJO
PLAYIN'.
00:16:20.946 --> 00:16:23.515 line:85% position:40% size:60%
[ LAUGHS ] THAT'S RIGHT.
00:16:23.582 --> 00:16:25.617 line:85% position:28% size:35%
>> NO. NO WAY.
00:16:25.684 --> 00:16:28.153 line:79% position:10% size:60% align:start
YOU LUMP ME IN HERE WITH
FATTY ARBUCKLE?
00:16:28.220 --> 00:16:28.954 line:85% position:23% size:25%
I CAN FLY!
00:16:29.021 --> 00:16:30.589 line:85% position:50% size:68%
I CAN SHOOT NUCLEAR BLASTS!
00:16:30.656 --> 00:16:33.759 line:79% position:10% size:78% align:start
I CAN LITERALLY -- LITERALLY --
TURN LEAD INTO GOLD!
00:16:33.826 --> 00:16:36.395 line:79% position:18% size:80% align:start
>> [ LAUGHS ]
WELL, YOU JUST HANG ON THERE, MY
00:16:36.462 --> 00:16:37.796 line:85% position:20% size:18%
FRIEND.
00:16:37.863 --> 00:16:40.799 line:79% position:48% size:75%
THIS BANJO COST ME ALMOST $60,
SO WE BOTH BRING A LOT TO THE
00:16:40.866 --> 00:16:41.834 line:85% position:18% size:15%
TABLE.
00:16:41.900 --> 00:16:43.435 line:79% position:25% size:28%
[ WHOOSH! ]
[ CLONK! ]
00:16:43.502 --> 00:16:45.037 line:79% position:10% size:63% align:start
>> NOW, WHERE THE FUCK IS
B'DG?!
00:16:45.104 --> 00:16:48.140 line:79% position:18% size:80% align:start
>> DOWN THE HALL, FIRST DRESSING
ROOM ON THE RIGHT.
00:16:48.207 --> 00:16:50.008 line:85% position:48% size:75%
>> OH, HELLO. MY NAME IS B'DG.
00:16:50.075 --> 00:16:51.377 line:79% position:10% size:25% align:start
[ CLONK! ]
AAH!
00:16:51.443 --> 00:16:54.546 line:79% position:13% size:80% align:start
>> AND, UM, WHOEVER'S BEEN
PICKING THEIR NOSE AT THE URINAL
00:16:54.613 --> 00:16:57.349 line:79% position:15% size:78% align:start
AND WIPING IT ON THE WALL, STOP
IT.
00:16:57.416 --> 00:16:58.951 line:79% position:28% size:33%
>> [ LAUGHS ]
THAT'S EVIL.
00:16:59.017 --> 00:17:00.185 line:85% position:35% size:48%
>> IT'S DISGUSTING.
00:17:00.252 --> 00:17:02.755 line:79% position:10% size:65% align:start
>> GUYS, WHAT IS THE WI-FI
PASSWORD IN HERE, AGAIN?
00:17:02.821 --> 00:17:06.191 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
>> MEOW, catwomanisABitch, ALL
ONE WORD, CAPITAL "B."
00:17:06.258 --> 00:17:07.793 line:79% position:10% size:43% align:start
>> [ CHUCKLES ]
NOW, THAT'S EVIL.
00:17:07.860 --> 00:17:09.461 line:79% position:33% size:45%
[ SIREN BLARING ]
>> RING DING DING!
00:17:09.528 --> 00:17:10.662 line:85% position:45% size:68%
>> IT'S THE JUSTICE LEAGUE.
00:17:10.729 --> 00:17:12.731 line:85% position:35% size:48%
WE'RE UNDER ATTACK.
00:17:12.798 --> 00:17:14.366 line:85% position:35% size:50%
>> QUIET, YOU FOOLS!
00:17:14.433 --> 00:17:23.342 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
[ BEEPING ]
SEE? AQUAMAN HAS COME ALONE.
00:17:23.409 --> 00:17:24.443 line:85% position:33% size:45%
>> GIGANTA, RIGHT?
00:17:24.510 --> 00:17:25.511 line:85% position:33% size:43%
>> SHOO! GO AWAY!
00:17:25.577 --> 00:17:26.311 line:85% position:25% size:28%
>> OW! HEY!
00:17:26.378 --> 00:17:27.746 line:85% position:43% size:63%
HEY, I JUST WANT TO TALK!
00:17:27.813 --> 00:17:31.750 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
>> ALL RIGHT, BUT THERE'S AN
ENTRANCE FEE.
00:17:31.817 --> 00:17:33.352 line:85% position:43% size:63%
>> GIGANTA, YOU DUMB COW!
00:17:33.419 --> 00:17:35.721 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start
YOU'VE LED MY ARCHENEMY RIGHT
TO US!
00:17:35.788 --> 00:17:38.056 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
BUT I'LL LIVE TO FIGHT ANOTHER
DAY!
00:17:38.123 --> 00:17:44.062 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start
[ DOOR OPENS, CLOSES ]
>> AQUAMAN, YOU ARE NOW OUR
00:17:44.129 --> 00:17:45.397 line:85% position:20% size:20%
HOSTAGE.
00:17:45.464 --> 00:17:49.601 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
>> I'M ALREADY A HOSTAGE,
LUTHOR, A HOSTAGE TO THE JLA's
00:17:49.668 --> 00:17:50.469 line:85% position:20% size:20%
INSULTS!
00:17:50.536 --> 00:17:51.737 line:85% position:25% size:30%
BUT NO MORE!
00:17:51.804 --> 00:17:57.209 line:79% position:18% size:78% align:start
AQUAMAN IS THE NEWEST MEMBER OF
THE LEGION OF DOOM!
00:17:57.276 --> 00:18:00.078 line:85% position:40% size:60%
GA-GOO! KRRKRR! KRRSHOO!
00:18:00.145 --> 00:18:02.815 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
>> L-LOOK, I-I DON'T WANT TO
HURT YOUR FEELINGS, BUT --
00:18:02.881 --> 00:18:05.651 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
>> I HAVE THE CODE'S TO THE
WATCHTOWER'S SERVICE ENTRANCE.
00:18:05.717 --> 00:18:06.785 line:85% position:38% size:55%
>> BUT WELCOME ABOARD!
00:18:06.852 --> 00:18:11.356 line:79% position:10% size:48% align:start
[ THUNDER CRASHES ]
[ LAUGHTER ]
00:18:11.423 --> 00:18:17.463 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start
[ THUNDER CRASHES ]
WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON OUT
00:18:17.529 --> 00:18:18.197 line:85% position:18% size:15%
THERE?
00:18:18.263 --> 00:18:19.698 line:85% position:40% size:58%
I LEFT MY WINDOWS DOWN!
00:18:19.765 --> 00:18:22.701 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
[ DOOR OPENS, CLOSES ]
>> NO, OUR DOCUMENTS SAY YOU
00:18:22.768 --> 00:18:26.238 line:79% position:15% size:78% align:start
WERE BORN ON AUGUST 15, 1865, A
TUESDAY.
00:18:26.305 --> 00:18:28.740 line:79% position:13% size:78% align:start
>> [ ROARS ]
>> IT SHOULD ALSO BE NOTED THAT
00:18:28.807 --> 00:18:31.343 line:79% position:10% size:63% align:start
YOUR ACTUAL LEGAL NAME IS
SOLOMON GRUESDAY.
00:18:31.410 --> 00:18:32.811 line:85% position:18% size:15%
>> AH!
00:18:32.878 --> 00:18:33.612 line:85% position:40% size:58%
>> HEY, GUYS! I'M BACK!
00:18:33.679 --> 00:18:34.713 line:85% position:33% size:45%
WHERE HAVE I BEEN?
00:18:34.780 --> 00:18:36.415 line:79% position:20% size:78% align:start
OH, KING OF THE OCEAN BUSINESS,
YOU KNOW.
00:18:36.482 --> 00:18:38.283 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
DIDN'T JOIN THE FORCES OF EVIL
OR ANYTHING.
00:18:38.350 --> 00:18:39.985 line:79% position:18% size:78% align:start
>> YOU GET THE CAKE FOR ROBIN'S
BAR MITZVAH?
00:18:40.052 --> 00:18:40.853 line:85% position:20% size:18%
>> YEP.
00:18:40.919 --> 00:18:42.387 line:85% position:50% size:78%
THAT'S ALL I'M GOOD FOR, RIGHT?
00:18:42.454 --> 00:18:43.355 line:85% position:18% size:15%
TA-DA!
00:18:43.422 --> 00:18:45.123 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start
>> AND THERE GOES OUR PETTY
CASH.
00:18:45.190 --> 00:18:47.559 line:79% position:13% size:80% align:start
>> [ SIGHS ]
BETTER TOO MUCH THAN TOO LITTLE,
00:18:47.626 --> 00:18:48.360 line:85% position:18% size:15%
RIGHT?
00:18:48.427 --> 00:18:49.828 line:85% position:45% size:70%
>> WHY, THIS ONE'S SO BIG...
00:18:49.895 --> 00:18:50.996 line:85% position:35% size:48%
>> HE'S BLOWING IT.
00:18:51.063 --> 00:18:53.832 line:79% position:15% size:78% align:start
>> RIDDLE ME THIS -- WHOSE HAND
IS THAT?
00:18:53.899 --> 00:18:55.234 line:85% position:48% size:75%
>> MINE'S BETWEEN TWO PILLOWS.
00:18:55.300 --> 00:18:57.603 line:79% position:13% size:78% align:start
>> YEAH, WE HEARD YOU THE FIRST
THREE TIMES, GRODD.
00:18:57.669 --> 00:18:58.904 line:85% position:43% size:63%
WE'VE ALL SEEN THE MOVIE.
00:18:58.971 --> 00:19:01.273 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start
ACTUALLY, I'VE NEVER SEEN IT,
BUT THAT JOKE WAS IN THE
00:19:01.340 --> 00:19:01.840 line:85% position:20% size:20%
TRAILER.
00:19:01.907 --> 00:19:02.341 line:85% position:28% size:35%
>> VA-VA-VA...
00:19:02.407 --> 00:19:03.308 line:85% position:20% size:20%
>> FINE.
00:19:03.375 --> 00:19:05.677 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
LET'S JUST GET IT IN THE REC
ROOM.
00:19:05.744 --> 00:19:07.145 line:85% position:25% size:30%
>> SURPRISE!
00:19:07.212 --> 00:19:09.014 line:85% position:40% size:60%
>> I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING!
00:19:09.081 --> 00:19:10.048 line:85% position:28% size:33%
WHAT IS THIS?
00:19:10.115 --> 00:19:12.084 line:79% position:25% size:78% align:start
>> IT'S AN AQUAMAN APPRECIATION
PARTY!
00:19:12.150 --> 00:19:13.519 line:85% position:45% size:70%
>> YEAH! ROBIN'S NOT JEWISH!
00:19:13.585 --> 00:19:16.255 line:79% position:13% size:78% align:start
>> OH, WE GIVE YOU A HARD TIME,
BUT ONLY BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU,
00:19:16.321 --> 00:19:17.055 line:85% position:15% size:10%
BRO!
00:19:17.122 --> 00:19:18.290 line:85% position:45% size:70%
>> YOU REALLY FEEL THAT WAY?
00:19:18.357 --> 00:19:20.592 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
>> DO I REALLY FEEL --
LOOK AT THIS GUY! OF COURSE!
00:19:20.659 --> 00:19:21.226 line:85% position:30% size:38%
WE'RE A FAMILY.
00:19:21.293 --> 00:19:22.461 line:85% position:33% size:43%
NOW DO THE HONOR.
00:19:22.528 --> 00:19:25.397 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
[ HEROES CHEERING ]
>> SHH! SOMETHING'S HAPPENING.
00:19:25.464 --> 00:19:28.500 line:85% position:50% size:78%
>> YEAH, AQUAMAN! IN THE HOUSE!
00:19:28.567 --> 00:19:29.935 line:85% position:38% size:55%
>> HEY! HEY, HEY, HEY!
00:19:30.002 --> 00:19:31.003 line:85% position:35% size:48%
>> QUIET, YOU FOOL!
00:19:31.069 --> 00:19:32.938 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start
>> BUT, BUT, BUT, BUT, BUT,
BUT --
00:19:33.005 --> 00:19:35.207 line:85% position:30% size:40%
>> I SAID QUIET!
00:19:35.274 --> 00:19:35.974 line:85% position:20% size:18%
>> AAH!
00:19:36.041 --> 00:19:37.809 line:85% position:43% size:63%
>> I TOLD YOU TO -- WAIT.
00:19:37.876 --> 00:19:39.645 line:85% position:50% size:78%
THEY'RE SHOVING KNIVES IN HERE?
00:19:39.711 --> 00:19:40.913 line:85% position:35% size:50%
GET OUT OF THE CAKE!
00:19:40.979 --> 00:19:43.181 line:79% position:10% size:50% align:start
[ HEROES GASP ]
>> WE'VE BEEN CAKED!
00:19:43.248 --> 00:19:44.483 line:85% position:43% size:65%
>> WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, GUYS.
00:19:44.550 --> 00:19:45.584 line:85% position:35% size:48%
MY LEGS ARE ASLEEP.
00:19:45.651 --> 00:19:47.586 line:79% position:10% size:58% align:start
>> NOW THEY'LL SEE WHAT
MR. BANJO CAN DO.
00:19:47.653 --> 00:19:50.956 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
[ UP-TEMPO BANJO MUSIC PLAYS ]
>> FACE IT, GREEN FOOL!
00:19:51.023 --> 00:19:53.458 line:79% position:15% size:80% align:start
YOU'RE NO MATCH FOR THE POWER OF
FEAR!
00:19:53.525 --> 00:19:54.293 line:85% position:20% size:20%
>> WHOA!
00:19:54.359 --> 00:19:56.028 line:85% position:48% size:75%
I CAN'T LOOK AT YOU LIKE THAT.
00:19:56.094 --> 00:19:57.262 line:85% position:33% size:45%
WAS THAT A CHOICE?
00:19:57.329 --> 00:19:58.964 line:85% position:45% size:68%
>> I GOT A STAPH INFECTION!
00:19:59.031 --> 00:19:59.965 line:85% position:28% size:35%
I ALMOST DIED!
00:20:00.032 --> 00:20:00.699 line:85% position:18% size:15%
>> OW!
00:20:00.766 --> 00:20:02.100 line:85% position:40% size:60%
WHO BROUGHT A KICKBALL?!
00:20:02.167 --> 00:20:03.802 line:85% position:50% size:68%
>> AM I HERE? OR OVER HERE?
00:20:03.869 --> 00:20:06.338 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
HOW WILL YOU KNOW WHICH IS THE
REAL --
00:20:06.405 --> 00:20:07.339 line:85% position:28% size:35%
>> FACE PUNCH.
00:20:07.406 --> 00:20:08.840 line:85% position:25% size:30%
>> OH, YEAH!
00:20:08.907 --> 00:20:09.608 line:85% position:20% size:18%
>> UGH!
00:20:09.675 --> 00:20:10.976 line:85% position:43% size:63%
>> SEE YOU NEXT GRUESDAY!
00:20:11.043 --> 00:20:11.677 line:85% position:23% size:25%
>> FREEZE!
00:20:11.743 --> 00:20:12.344 line:85% position:23% size:23%
>> CHILL!
00:20:12.411 --> 00:20:12.911 line:85% position:20% size:18%
>> ICE!
00:20:12.978 --> 00:20:13.612 line:85% position:23% size:25%
>> FREEZE!
00:20:13.679 --> 00:20:14.212 line:85% position:20% size:20%
>> COOL!
00:20:14.279 --> 00:20:14.913 line:85% position:23% size:25%
>> FREEZE!
00:20:14.980 --> 00:20:15.480 line:85% position:20% size:18%
>> MEH!
00:20:15.547 --> 00:20:15.914 line:85% position:18% size:15%
>> OW!
00:20:15.981 --> 00:20:16.949 line:85% position:18% size:15%
>> OH!
00:20:17.015 --> 00:20:18.417 line:79% position:10% size:53% align:start
>> YEAH, I'M DROPPING
MOTHER FUCKA'S!
00:20:18.483 --> 00:20:19.685 line:85% position:25% size:30%
WHO'S NEXT?!
00:20:19.751 --> 00:20:22.287 line:79% position:18% size:78% align:start
>> I'D FIGHT YOU, WONDER WOMAN,
BUT I'VE GOT A DICK.
00:20:22.354 --> 00:20:23.455 line:85% position:15% size:8%
OW!
00:20:23.522 --> 00:20:24.590 line:85% position:23% size:25%
OH, GREAT.
00:20:24.656 --> 00:20:27.259 line:79% position:20% size:78% align:start
LIKE I WAS DROWNING IN COOCH TO
START WITH.
00:20:27.326 --> 00:20:30.228 line:79% position:10% size:65% align:start
NOW I'VE GOT A NOSE LIKE A
FUCKIN' CAN OPENER.
00:20:30.295 --> 00:20:30.862 line:85% position:18% size:15%
>> EH.
00:20:30.929 --> 00:20:32.164 line:79% position:10% size:23% align:start
[ SIGHS ]
OH!
00:20:32.230 --> 00:20:33.198 line:85% position:20% size:20%
>> MM...
00:20:33.265 --> 00:20:36.034 line:79% position:10% size:65% align:start
[ SMOOCHES ]
>> WAS I SUPPOSED TO FIGHT
00:20:36.101 --> 00:20:36.935 line:85% position:23% size:23%
DARKSEID?
00:20:37.002 --> 00:20:39.338 line:85% position:50% size:78%
'CAUSE I'M A GUY IN A CAT SUIT.
00:20:39.404 --> 00:20:40.606 line:85% position:38% size:53%
>> GIVE IT UP, JOKER.
00:20:40.672 --> 00:20:41.773 line:85% position:35% size:48%
YOU'LL N-- UGH! OW!
00:20:41.840 --> 00:20:43.475 line:85% position:50% size:75%
IS THAT -- IS THAT PISS, DUDE?
00:20:43.542 --> 00:20:45.711 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start
DID YOU JUST SQUIRT PISS IN MY
MOUTH?
00:20:45.777 --> 00:20:47.479 line:85% position:50% size:78%
OH, WE ARE DONE PROFESSIONALLY!
00:20:47.546 --> 00:20:50.415 line:85% position:50% size:80%
>> HAH! IT'S NOT HIS PISS, BATS.
00:20:50.482 --> 00:20:53.018 line:85% position:50% size:80%
>> THAT IS ONLY SLIGHTLY BETTER.
00:20:53.085 --> 00:20:54.152 line:85% position:15% size:10%
AAH!
00:20:54.219 --> 00:20:57.122 line:79% position:23% size:80% align:start
AAH, RULE OF THREE, ASSHOLE, NOT
FOUR!
00:20:57.189 --> 00:20:58.123 line:85% position:25% size:28%
>> OW, MAN!
00:20:58.190 --> 00:20:58.991 line:85% position:23% size:23%
HEY, NOW!
00:20:59.057 --> 00:21:00.792 line:85% position:20% size:20%
OH! OHH!
00:21:00.859 --> 00:21:02.995 line:79% position:10% size:80% align:start
>> I CAN'T CONCENTRATE WITH THAT
DAMN BANJO NOISE!
00:21:03.061 --> 00:21:05.197 line:79% position:10% size:55% align:start
[ MUSIC STOPS ]
>> FINE. SUCK ON THIS.
00:21:05.263 --> 00:21:06.531 line:85% position:15% size:10%
AAH!
00:21:06.598 --> 00:21:10.102 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
>> YET AGAIN, THE WORLD'S
GREATEST VILLAIN AND EARTH'S
00:21:10.168 --> 00:21:13.538 line:79% position:10% size:80% align:start
MIGHTIEST HERO MUST DO THE DANCE
OF DEATH.
00:21:13.605 --> 00:21:15.507 line:79% position:10% size:45% align:start
MOTHER FUCKER!
THAT SPLIT MY LIP!
00:21:15.574 --> 00:21:16.475 line:85% position:30% size:38%
ENOUGH OF THIS!
00:21:16.541 --> 00:21:17.676 line:85% position:38% size:53%
TIME FOR THE ENDGAME.
00:21:17.743 --> 00:21:19.177 line:85% position:50% size:78%
AQUAMAN, THE KRYPTONITE -- NOW!
00:21:19.244 --> 00:21:20.345 line:85% position:28% size:35%
>> KRYPTONITE?
00:21:20.412 --> 00:21:22.881 line:79% position:28% size:78% align:start
>> THROW ME THE KRYPTONITE, AND
EVIL WILL WIN!
00:21:22.948 --> 00:21:24.483 line:85% position:48% size:73%
>> NO! AQUAMAN, I'M YOUR BRO!
00:21:24.549 --> 00:21:27.352 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start
>> BRO? YOU TREATED HIM LIKE
POND SCUM FOR TOO LONG.
00:21:27.419 --> 00:21:29.221 line:85% position:40% size:58%
NOW HE HAS HIS REVENGE.
00:21:43.869 --> 00:21:45.504 line:85% position:33% size:43%
>> SORRY, LUTHOR.
00:21:45.570 --> 00:21:47.039 line:85% position:30% size:38%
I'M NO VILLAIN.
00:21:47.105 --> 00:21:48.273 line:85% position:25% size:28%
I'M A HERO.
00:21:48.340 --> 00:21:50.842 line:85% position:50% size:70%
AND I'M GONNA KICK YOUR ASS!
00:21:50.909 --> 00:21:52.010 line:85% position:23% size:25%
AQUAPUNCH!
00:21:52.077 --> 00:21:52.844 line:85% position:18% size:13%
YEAH!
00:21:52.911 --> 00:21:55.781 line:85% position:48% size:73%
AQUAMAN GETS HIS GROOVE BACK!
00:21:55.847 --> 00:21:59.685 line:79% position:10% size:80% align:start
OH FUCK.
>> HOW CAN YOU MEASURE THE VALUE
00:21:59.751 --> 00:22:02.120 line:79% position:15% size:78% align:start
OF A MAN WHO DID SO MUCH FOR SO
MANY?
00:22:02.187 --> 00:22:05.724 line:79% position:23% size:80% align:start
AND WHAT WILL WE DO WITHOUT HIM,
WITHOUT...
00:22:05.791 --> 00:22:06.958 line:85% position:18% size:15%
GLENN?
00:22:07.025 --> 00:22:08.860 line:79% position:10% size:60% align:start
>> TH IS HOW THE
"ROBOT CHICKEN DC COMICS
00:22:08.927 --> 00:22:10.996 line:79% position:10% size:60% align:start
SPECIAL" ENDS, WITH SOME
CHEAP-ASS MISDIRECT?
00:22:11.063 --> 00:22:13.198 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start
WE'RE NOT EVEN GONNA FIND OUT
HOW YOU SURVIVED?
00:22:13.265 --> 00:22:14.433 line:85% position:43% size:65%
EVERYONE'S OKAY WITH THIS?
00:22:14.499 --> 00:22:15.701 line:85% position:45% size:68%
>> SHH. DON'T WORRY, JIMMY.
00:22:15.767 --> 00:22:16.968 line:85% position:45% size:68%
YOU WON'T REMEMBER A THING.
00:22:17.035 --> 00:22:19.471 line:79% position:10% size:53% align:start
[ SMOOCHES ]
AND NEITHER WILL YOU.
00:22:19.538 --> 00:22:20.839 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start
[ SMOOCHES ]
>> ♪ YOU CAN TRY AND FIGHT ME
00:22:22.774 --> 00:22:26.578 line:15% position:10% size:70% align:start
OFF ♪
♪ BUT I-I'M A M-MAN OF STEEL
00:22:26.645 --> 00:22:30.449 line:15% position:50% size:65%
♪ I'M GON' KISS YOU, HOMES
♪ AND YOU WON'T REMEMBER A
00:22:30.515 --> 00:22:33.719 line:15% position:10% size:68% align:start
THING ♪
>> HMM. YOU KNOW, THE THING
00:22:33.785 --> 00:22:37.723 line:21% position:10% size:45% align:start
ABOUT GLENN WAS --
OH! DAMN IT!
00:22:37.789 --> 00:22:37.856 line:15% position:10% size:73% align:start
>> ♪ BUT I DON'T WANT TO KISS
YOUR THING ♪
00:22:38.123 --> 00:22:39.891 line:10% position:10% size:73% align:start
>> ♪ BUT I DON'T WANT TO KISS
00:22:39.958 --> 00:22:42.160 line:10% position:10% size:30% align:start
YOUR THING ♪