WEBVTT X-TIMESTAMP-MAP=LOCAL:00:00:00.000,MPEGTS:9000 00:00:03.236 --> 00:00:04.571 line:21% position:35% size:48% >> "ROBOT CHICKEN." 00:00:04.637 --> 00:00:07.974 line:21% position:10% size:68% align:start FOR 100 EPISODES, THEY'VE DEFILED EVERY ENTERTAINMENT 00:00:08.041 --> 00:00:09.776 line:21% position:45% size:70% BRAND IN THE KNOWN UNIVERSE. 00:00:09.843 --> 00:00:12.512 line:21% position:23% size:78% align:start [ TING! ] NOW THEIR GREATEST CHALLENGE -- 00:00:12.579 --> 00:00:16.483 line:21% position:10% size:80% align:start RIDING THE COATTAILS OF THE MOST ICONIC CHARACTERS OF ALL TIME, 00:00:16.549 --> 00:00:18.184 line:21% position:50% size:65% NOT COUNTING HARRY POTTER. 00:00:18.251 --> 00:00:20.019 line:21% position:50% size:65% THE DC COMICS SUPERHEROES! 00:00:20.086 --> 00:00:22.722 line:21% position:10% size:70% align:start SOME OF THEM MORE SUPER THAN OTHERS. 00:00:22.789 --> 00:00:24.691 line:21% position:50% size:70% THAT GUY JUST TALKS TO FISH. 00:00:24.758 --> 00:00:26.726 line:21% position:20% size:18% >> HEY! 00:00:26.793 --> 00:00:28.595 line:21% position:10% size:33% align:start [ BAM! BAM! ] [ CLONK! ] 00:00:35.635 --> 00:00:37.437 line:79% position:23% size:23% [ WHAP! ] [ PLOP! ] 00:00:44.577 --> 00:00:52.051 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start THIS IS THE "ROBOT CHICKEN DC COMICS SPECIAL" -- #rcdc. 00:00:52.118 --> 00:00:53.386 line:85% position:50% size:75% >> OH, BOY! THE INVISIBLE JET! 00:00:53.453 --> 00:00:54.053 line:85% position:25% size:30% >> HURRY UP! 00:00:54.120 --> 00:00:54.954 line:85% position:35% size:48% >> LET'S GO, BUDDY! 00:00:55.021 --> 00:00:55.555 line:85% position:25% size:28% >> COME ON! 00:00:55.622 --> 00:00:56.122 line:85% position:28% size:35% >> I'M COMING! 00:00:56.189 --> 00:00:56.623 line:85% position:15% size:8% OW! 00:00:56.689 --> 00:00:57.290 line:85% position:23% size:25% >> PSYCHE! 00:00:57.357 --> 00:00:58.258 line:79% position:10% size:30% align:start [ LAUGHTER ] OW! 00:00:58.324 --> 00:00:59.793 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start >> LAST ONE TO THE PARTY CAN'T FLY. 00:00:59.859 --> 00:01:01.728 line:79% position:15% size:78% align:start YOU'RE GONNA BE THE LAST ONE TO THE PARTY. 00:01:01.795 --> 00:01:02.562 line:85% position:38% size:53% 'CAUSE YOU CAN'T FLY. 00:01:02.629 --> 00:01:03.263 line:85% position:20% size:20% >> FINE. 00:01:03.329 --> 00:01:07.300 line:85% position:38% size:53% I'LL JUST SWIM THERE. 00:01:07.367 --> 00:01:10.904 line:79% position:10% size:38% align:start [ SIGHS ] >> SILLY PUNKS. 00:01:10.970 --> 00:01:12.305 line:85% position:38% size:55% BATMAN OWNS THE NIGHT. 00:01:12.372 --> 00:01:14.574 line:79% position:10% size:55% align:start NOW TASTE FEAR, YOU -- WAIT. WAIT. WHAT? 00:01:14.641 --> 00:01:15.975 line:85% position:20% size:20% OH, GOD! 00:01:16.042 --> 00:01:18.878 line:79% position:15% size:78% align:start OH, MY BACK JUST SNAPPED LIKE A PACK OF UNCOOKED SPAGHETTI! 00:01:18.945 --> 00:01:22.449 line:79% position:48% size:75% OH, YOU JUST WALK UP AND BREAK MY BACK WITHOUT SAYING A WORD! 00:01:22.515 --> 00:01:25.118 line:85% position:43% size:63% OH, BOO! BOO ON YOU, SIR! 00:01:25.185 --> 00:01:32.158 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start >> ♪ DO DO DO-DO, THAT'S BANE >> AND NOW... 00:01:32.225 --> 00:01:33.293 line:85% position:30% size:40% >> HI! I'M B'DG. 00:01:33.359 --> 00:01:35.895 line:79% position:35% size:50% I'M A MEMBER OF THE GREEN LANTERN CORPS. 00:01:35.962 --> 00:01:37.697 line:85% position:50% size:73% >> CAN YOU BELIEVE IT, FOLKS? 00:01:37.764 --> 00:01:40.934 line:85% position:33% size:43% HE REALLY EXISTS. 00:01:41.000 --> 00:01:42.035 line:85% position:20% size:20% >> UH... 00:01:42.101 --> 00:01:44.471 line:79% position:10% size:65% align:start DO YOU GUYS WANT ME TO SAY ANYTHING, OR...? 00:01:44.537 --> 00:01:48.107 line:79% position:50% size:80% >> TUNE IN NEXT TIME FOR ANOTHER EDITION OF "REAL CHARACTERS FROM 00:01:48.174 --> 00:01:49.509 line:85% position:33% size:43% THE DC UNIVERSE." 00:01:49.576 --> 00:01:53.179 line:79% position:50% size:73% >> LOIS, YOU HELPED ME DEFEAT GENERAL ZOD -- "SUPERMAN II." 00:01:53.246 --> 00:01:54.481 line:85% position:48% size:75% BUT NOW YOU KNOW I'M SUPERMAN. 00:01:54.547 --> 00:01:56.349 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start I-I HAVE TO KISS YOU AND MAKE YOU FORGET. 00:01:56.416 --> 00:01:58.384 line:79% position:15% size:80% align:start >> WHY WOULD THAT BE ONE OF YOUR SUPERPOWERS? 00:01:58.451 --> 00:02:00.653 line:79% position:15% size:80% align:start >> [ Mockingly ] "WHY WOULD THAT BE BLAH BLAH BLAH?" 00:02:00.720 --> 00:02:02.522 line:79% position:10% size:60% align:start YOU SHOULD HEAR YOURSELF SOMETIMES, LOIS. 00:02:02.589 --> 00:02:04.324 line:79% position:28% size:33% [ SMOOCHES ] >> HUH? WHAT? 00:02:04.390 --> 00:02:07.627 line:79% position:50% size:68% WHY AM I STANDING HERE WITH CLARK KENT WHEN I SHOULD BE 00:02:07.694 --> 00:02:09.429 line:85% position:48% size:75% CHASING THE SCOOP ON SUPERMAN? 00:02:09.496 --> 00:02:11.998 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start >> I SHOULD REALLY USE THAT POWER MORE OFTEN. 00:02:12.065 --> 00:02:13.299 line:85% position:38% size:53% >> MY BEAUTIFUL HAIR. 00:02:13.366 --> 00:02:15.735 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start I'LL NEVER FORGET HOW YOU TOOK IT FROM ME, SUPERMAN -- 00:02:15.802 --> 00:02:17.070 line:85% position:45% size:70% Adventure Comics number 271. 00:02:17.136 --> 00:02:18.338 line:85% position:28% size:35% >> OH, REALLY? 00:02:18.404 --> 00:02:21.875 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start >> SUPERMAN! I'LL DESTROY -- WH-WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 00:02:21.941 --> 00:02:24.511 line:79% position:13% size:80% align:start >> [ SMOOCHES ] >> I-I CAN'T REMEMBER WHY I HATE 00:02:24.577 --> 00:02:25.178 line:85% position:15% size:10% YOU. 00:02:25.245 --> 00:02:27.747 line:85% position:35% size:50% >> OH, YEAH. I KNOW. 00:02:27.814 --> 00:02:31.284 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start >> ♪ YOU MIGHT WANT TO CLOSE YOUR EYES ♪ 00:02:31.351 --> 00:02:33.653 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start ♪ I'LL RUN MY FINGERS THROUGH YOUR HAIR ♪ 00:02:33.720 --> 00:02:37.457 line:79% position:50% size:65% ♪ AND I'LL KISS YOU, BRO ♪ AND YOU WON'T REMEMBER A 00:02:37.524 --> 00:02:41.895 line:79% position:10% size:60% align:start THING ♪ ♪ DON'T TRY AND RUN AWAY 00:02:41.961 --> 00:02:43.329 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start ♪ I'M FASTER THAN A SPEEDING BULLET ♪ 00:02:43.396 --> 00:02:44.564 line:85% position:43% size:63% >> ANOTHER JOB WELL DONE. 00:02:44.631 --> 00:02:46.032 line:79% position:10% size:65% align:start >> ♪ AND I'LL CATCH YOU -- [ RECORD SCRATCHES ] 00:02:46.099 --> 00:02:50.169 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start >> EW. I SHOULD HAVE THOUGHT THIS THROUGH. 00:02:50.236 --> 00:02:54.407 line:85% position:20% size:18% >> HUH? 00:02:54.474 --> 00:02:57.443 line:85% position:15% size:10% HUH? 00:02:57.510 --> 00:02:58.344 line:85% position:25% size:30% >> OH, WELL. 00:02:58.411 --> 00:03:03.683 line:79% position:10% size:38% align:start [ PANTS UNZIP ] [ URINATING ] 00:03:03.750 --> 00:03:05.418 line:85% position:15% size:8% EH! 00:03:05.485 --> 00:03:09.856 line:79% position:25% size:28% [ FARTING ] [ GRUNTS ] 00:03:09.923 --> 00:03:14.093 line:79% position:23% size:25% [ SIGHS ] [ GRUNTS ] 00:03:14.160 --> 00:03:16.329 line:79% position:10% size:50% align:start [ SIGHS ] HEY, HOW'S IT GOING? 00:03:16.396 --> 00:03:21.067 line:79% position:10% size:35% align:start >> [ MUTTERS ] OH, COME ON! 00:03:21.134 --> 00:03:23.202 line:79% position:45% size:70% >> WELCOME, EVERYONE, TO THE GRAND OPENING OF OUR NEWEST 00:03:23.269 --> 00:03:26.072 line:85% position:50% size:80% EXHIBIT, THE BLUE STAR OF EGYPT. 00:03:26.139 --> 00:03:27.740 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start [ CROWD GASPS ] [ SIGHS ] ALL RIGHT, PEOPLE. 00:03:27.807 --> 00:03:29.042 line:85% position:50% size:78% WE ALL KNOW WHAT'S COMING NEXT. 00:03:29.108 --> 00:03:30.910 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start LET'S SEE IF WE CAN AT LEAST MAKE IT THROUGH A ROUND OF 00:03:30.977 --> 00:03:32.879 line:79% position:13% size:78% align:start HORS D'OEUVRES BEFORE THE FIRST SUPERVILLAIN SHOWS UP. 00:03:32.946 --> 00:03:34.280 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start APPARENTLY, THERE'S A SALMON BAGEL BITE -- 00:03:34.347 --> 00:03:35.415 line:85% position:38% size:53% >> EVERYBODY, FREEZE! 00:03:35.481 --> 00:03:36.983 line:79% position:10% size:60% align:start [ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS ] [ CROWD SCREAMING ] 00:03:37.050 --> 00:03:41.354 line:79% position:50% size:80% SORRY TO BE SO COLDHEARTED, BUT MR. FREEZE IS STEALING THAT ICE. 00:03:41.421 --> 00:03:43.990 line:79% position:10% size:58% align:start [ SCREAMING CONTINUES ] >> [ CRUNCHES ] MMM! 00:03:44.057 --> 00:03:45.325 line:85% position:50% size:70% I WAS NOT EXPECTING PAPRIKA. 00:03:45.391 --> 00:03:48.595 line:85% position:48% size:73% MMM! A-PLUS EFFORT, HONESTLY. 00:03:48.661 --> 00:03:49.929 line:85% position:40% size:58% >> EVERYONE, CHILL OUT! 00:03:49.996 --> 00:03:52.999 line:79% position:15% size:78% align:start [ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS ] OR CAPTAIN COLD WILL PUT YOU ON 00:03:53.066 --> 00:03:53.533 line:85% position:15% size:10% ICE! 00:03:53.600 --> 00:03:54.634 line:85% position:25% size:30% OH, COME ON! 00:03:54.701 --> 00:03:56.636 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start >> I THOUGHT WE HAD A SCHEDULE WORKED OUT! 00:03:56.703 --> 00:03:57.570 line:85% position:30% size:38% THIS IS MY DAY! 00:03:57.637 --> 00:03:59.038 line:85% position:43% size:65% >> I HAVE A NEW ASSISTANT. 00:03:59.105 --> 00:04:01.274 line:85% position:45% size:70% I-I'M STILL BREAKING HIM IN. 00:04:01.341 --> 00:04:02.542 line:85% position:40% size:58% >> EVERYONE, STAY COOL! 00:04:02.609 --> 00:04:04.877 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start [ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS ] IT'S ABOUT TO GET DOWNRIGHT 00:04:04.944 --> 00:04:09.482 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start BONE-CHILLING IN HERE, THANKS TO...ICICLE! 00:04:09.549 --> 00:04:11.718 line:79% position:10% size:63% align:start WOW. I JUST WALKED INTO A CLUSTER FUCK HUH? 00:04:11.784 --> 00:04:12.919 line:85% position:20% size:18% >> MMM! 00:04:12.986 --> 00:04:14.721 line:79% position:13% size:78% align:start YOU GUYS, YOU HAVE TO TRY THESE SALMON THINGIES. 00:04:14.787 --> 00:04:16.155 line:85% position:40% size:58% >> FOCUS, CAPTAIN COLD. 00:04:16.222 --> 00:04:19.058 line:79% position:10% size:78% align:start CLEARLY, THERE'S NOT ROOM FOR THREE COLD-THEMED VILLAINS WITH 00:04:19.125 --> 00:04:20.426 line:85% position:25% size:30% FREEZE RAYS. 00:04:20.493 --> 00:04:22.762 line:79% position:48% size:73% >> I GUESS YOU TWO SNOW JOBS WILL HAVE TO CHANGE GIMMICKS, 00:04:22.829 --> 00:04:23.496 line:85% position:18% size:13% THEN. 00:04:23.563 --> 00:04:24.597 line:85% position:40% size:58% >> IT'S NOT MY GIMMICK! 00:04:24.664 --> 00:04:26.766 line:79% position:10% size:65% align:start I'LL LITERALLY DIE IN WARM TEMPERATURES. 00:04:26.833 --> 00:04:29.802 line:79% position:10% size:78% align:start MY CRYOGENICALLY FROZEN WIFE IS MY ENTIRE REASON FOR LIVING. 00:04:29.869 --> 00:04:32.639 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start MY NAME IS VICTOR FRIES, FOR GOD'S SAKE. 00:04:32.705 --> 00:04:35.308 line:79% position:50% size:78% >> IT'S "FREEZE," BUT YOU SPELL IT "FRIES," LIKE FRENCH FRIES. 00:04:35.375 --> 00:04:35.908 line:85% position:18% size:15% WEIRD. 00:04:35.975 --> 00:04:37.210 line:85% position:30% size:38% >> IT'S GERMAN. 00:04:37.276 --> 00:04:40.113 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start >> WELL, I AIN'T CHANGING, YA DICKS. 00:04:40.179 --> 00:04:41.347 line:85% position:35% size:50% >> EVERYONE, FREEZE! 00:04:41.414 --> 00:04:42.615 line:85% position:35% size:50% OH, FOR FUCK'S SAKE! 00:04:42.682 --> 00:04:45.284 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start >> OHH! I COMPLETELY FORGOT ABOUT CHILLBLAINE. 00:04:45.351 --> 00:04:46.786 line:85% position:43% size:65% >> YOU AND AMERICA, BUDDY. 00:04:46.853 --> 00:04:50.123 line:79% position:15% size:80% align:start >> IT TOOK ME SIX YEARS OF RESEARCH TO BUILD MY FREEZE RAY. 00:04:50.189 --> 00:04:52.925 line:79% position:15% size:78% align:start HOW DO YOU HIGH-SCHOOL DROPOUTS KEEP MAKING THEM? 00:04:52.992 --> 00:04:56.562 line:79% position:50% size:80% ARE THEY AS EASY TO BUILD AS HAM RADIOS AND I'M JUST AN ASSHOLE?! 00:04:56.629 --> 00:04:59.699 line:79% position:13% size:78% align:start >> UH, GUYS, WE'VE DEMOLISHED A LOT OF LOAD-BEARING WALLS IN 00:04:59.766 --> 00:05:01.067 line:85% position:18% size:13% HERE. 00:05:01.134 --> 00:05:03.670 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start >> WELL, THOSE VILLAINS ARE GOING TO THE COOLER, THANKS TO 00:05:03.736 --> 00:05:08.007 line:79% position:10% size:65% align:start ICE AND HER AMAZING FREEZE POWERS. 00:05:08.074 --> 00:05:10.476 line:79% position:10% size:55% align:start [ SIREN CHIRPS, DIES ] COOL! 00:05:10.543 --> 00:05:13.279 line:79% position:13% size:78% align:start >> I'M GLAD YOU GUYS COULD COME ALL THE WAY TO EARTH-C. 00:05:13.346 --> 00:05:16.215 line:79% position:13% size:78% align:start >> ME AND CAPTAIN CARROT DIDN'T SEE EYE TO EYE ON A LOT OF 00:05:16.282 --> 00:05:18.584 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start THINGS, BUT NO ONE DESERVED TO DIE LIKE THAT. 00:05:18.651 --> 00:05:21.487 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start >> I NEVER MET THE CAPTAIN OR HIS ZOO CREW, BUT SINCE YOU 00:05:21.554 --> 00:05:27.760 line:79% position:10% size:78% align:start VOUCHED FOR HIM, I'M GLAD TO BE HERE IN THEIR TIME OF NEED. 00:05:27.827 --> 00:05:32.165 line:79% position:10% size:65% align:start [ CAR DOOR OPENS, CLOSES ] >> [ GIGGLING ] 00:05:32.231 --> 00:05:34.434 line:79% position:10% size:80% align:start WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME THEY LOOK LIKE CARTOONS? 00:05:34.500 --> 00:05:35.968 line:85% position:18% size:13% WAIT. 00:05:36.035 --> 00:05:38.604 line:79% position:10% size:43% align:start [ CLEARS THROAT ] I'M GOOD. 00:05:38.671 --> 00:05:41.507 line:79% position:10% size:48% align:start [ LAUGHS ] DAMN IT! I'M SORRY. 00:05:41.574 --> 00:05:43.409 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start >> IF YOU CAN'T KEEP IT TOGETHER, YOU NEED TO LEAVE. 00:05:43.476 --> 00:05:44.677 line:85% position:33% size:45% >> I KNOW. I KNOW. 00:05:44.744 --> 00:05:47.814 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start FOR THE LOVE OF -- IT'S A TURTLE WEARING GOGGLES! 00:05:47.880 --> 00:05:49.248 line:85% position:38% size:53% I'M SORRY. I'M SORRY. 00:05:49.315 --> 00:05:52.685 line:79% position:10% size:53% align:start [ TAPS PLAYS ] [ STIFLING LAUGHTER ] 00:05:52.752 --> 00:05:57.757 line:79% position:10% size:25% align:start [ GRUNTS ] I'M S-- 00:05:57.824 --> 00:06:00.126 line:79% position:10% size:48% align:start I'M SOR-- IT'S JUST...THAT... 00:06:00.193 --> 00:06:01.494 line:85% position:30% size:40% HE LOOKS SO SAD. 00:06:01.561 --> 00:06:04.864 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start >> [ SNORTS ] >> [ Laughing ] I CAN'T -- I 00:06:04.931 --> 00:06:06.466 line:85% position:35% size:48% CAN'T -- I'M SORRY. 00:06:06.532 --> 00:06:09.335 line:85% position:20% size:20% I CAN'T! 00:06:09.402 --> 00:06:11.104 line:79% position:10% size:58% align:start >> YOUR FRIEND WAS VERY INAPPROPRIATE. 00:06:11.170 --> 00:06:12.705 line:79% position:10% size:45% align:start >> WE'RE SO SORRY, LITTLE CHEESE. 00:06:12.772 --> 00:06:14.240 line:85% position:50% size:75% >> [ LAUGHS ] "LITTLE CHEESE." 00:06:14.307 --> 00:06:16.642 line:79% position:45% size:68% >> I JUST DON'T SEE HOW YOU COULD LET IT GET THIS BAD. 00:06:16.709 --> 00:06:17.877 line:85% position:45% size:70% >> IT'S A SWAMP THING, BABY. 00:06:17.944 --> 00:06:19.245 line:85% position:40% size:60% YOU WOULDN'T UNDERSTAND. 00:06:19.312 --> 00:06:20.680 line:85% position:20% size:18% >> AHH. 00:06:20.747 --> 00:06:23.282 line:79% position:15% size:80% align:start BANE BROKE MY BACK, BUT YEARS OF TRAINING ALLOWED ME TO HEAL IN 00:06:23.349 --> 00:06:24.484 line:85% position:25% size:30% RECORD TIME. 00:06:24.550 --> 00:06:27.019 line:79% position:18% size:78% align:start NOW LET'S SEE WHAT THE JOKER -- OH, MY GOD, NO! 00:06:27.086 --> 00:06:28.221 line:79% position:10% size:25% align:start [ CRACK! ] AAH! 00:06:28.287 --> 00:06:29.989 line:85% position:48% size:75% LIKE A STRING OF FIRECRACKERS! 00:06:30.056 --> 00:06:31.357 line:85% position:30% size:40% MY FUCKING BACK! 00:06:31.424 --> 00:06:34.360 line:79% position:45% size:70% I FELT THE SOLES OF MY FEET TOUCH THE BACK OF MY HEAD ON 00:06:34.427 --> 00:06:35.528 line:85% position:23% size:23% THAT ONE! 00:06:35.595 --> 00:06:41.267 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start >> ♪ DO DO DO-DO, THAT'S BANE >> AND NOW... 00:06:41.334 --> 00:06:43.069 line:85% position:50% size:73% >> HEY, THERE. I'M FIRESTORM. 00:06:43.136 --> 00:06:44.871 line:85% position:50% size:73% >> CAN YOU BELIEVE IT, FOLKS? 00:06:44.937 --> 00:06:46.839 line:85% position:50% size:80% TAKE A GOOD LOOK AT THIS DOUCHE! 00:06:46.906 --> 00:06:49.675 line:85% position:35% size:48% >> I'M...FIRESTORM. 00:06:49.742 --> 00:06:50.710 line:85% position:30% size:40% THE NUCLEAR MAN. 00:06:50.777 --> 00:06:52.311 line:85% position:45% size:70% I WAS IN THE JUSTICE LEAGUE. 00:06:52.378 --> 00:06:54.580 line:79% position:10% size:78% align:start >> HIS HAIR IS ACTUALLY MADE OF FIRE. 00:06:54.647 --> 00:06:57.550 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start BET HE BLOWS THROUGH HIS COMB BUDGET PRETTY QUICKLY. 00:06:57.617 --> 00:06:59.085 line:85% position:43% size:65% >> BUT I'M REALLY POPULAR. 00:06:59.152 --> 00:07:02.121 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start >> WE'LL BE BACK NEXT TIME FOR "REAL CHARACTERS OF THE DC 00:07:02.188 --> 00:07:03.089 line:85% position:23% size:25% UNIVERSE." 00:07:03.156 --> 00:07:04.524 line:79% position:10% size:65% align:start >> WHAT ARE WE DOING HERE, LANTERN? 00:07:04.590 --> 00:07:05.525 line:85% position:38% size:53% >> WHAT'S THE MATTER? 00:07:05.591 --> 00:07:06.959 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start YOU A LITTLE RUSTY WITH THE LADIES? 00:07:07.026 --> 00:07:10.797 line:79% position:50% size:78% >> HA! IF ANYONE'S GONNA SCORE TONIGHT, IT'S THE MAN OF STEEL. 00:07:10.863 --> 00:07:13.633 line:79% position:50% size:70% >> HAVEN'T YOU BEEN COURTING LOIS LANE FOR LIKE 15 YEARS? 00:07:13.699 --> 00:07:14.767 line:85% position:38% size:53% >> DO YOU EVER SCORE? 00:07:14.834 --> 00:07:17.203 line:85% position:35% size:48% >> WATCH AND LEARN. 00:07:17.270 --> 00:07:19.939 line:79% position:50% size:78% "HEY, LADIES, YOU LOOK LIKE YOU COULD USE A NON-THREATENING GUY 00:07:20.006 --> 00:07:21.841 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start PAL WHO WILL NEVER PUSH YOUR BOUNDARIES." 00:07:21.908 --> 00:07:24.377 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start >> "AND WHILE YOU'RE AT IT, COULD YOU COSIGN MY LOAN FOR A 00:07:24.443 --> 00:07:26.078 line:79% position:10% size:50% align:start LATE MODEL COROLLA?" >> "GOT A PEN?" 00:07:26.145 --> 00:07:30.650 line:79% position:10% size:63% align:start [ BOTH LAUGH ] >> [ Laughing ] OH! OUCH! 00:07:30.716 --> 00:07:33.052 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start >> NOT EVEN I COULD GET TO THE FRIEND ZONE THAT FAST. 00:07:33.119 --> 00:07:35.888 line:79% position:50% size:78% >> CLASS IS IN SESSION, PEOPLE, AS SOON AS I GET THIS SUIT OFF. 00:07:35.955 --> 00:07:37.156 line:85% position:45% size:70% >> HOLD ON THERE, MONEYBAGS. 00:07:37.223 --> 00:07:38.457 line:85% position:50% size:70% YOU GOT TO DO IT IN COSTUME. 00:07:38.524 --> 00:07:39.659 line:85% position:43% size:65% >> YEAH, THAT'S THE RULES. 00:07:39.725 --> 00:07:40.827 line:85% position:48% size:73% WE ALL HAVE TO BE IN COSTUME. 00:07:40.893 --> 00:07:41.661 line:85% position:20% size:20% >> WHA?! 00:07:41.727 --> 00:07:43.563 line:85% position:50% size:73% I'M DRESSED LIKE A GIANT BAT! 00:07:43.629 --> 00:07:44.530 line:85% position:35% size:48% WELL FUCK YOU GUYS. 00:07:44.597 --> 00:07:45.832 line:85% position:35% size:48% I'M GETTING WASTED. 00:07:45.898 --> 00:07:48.568 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start >> GOT A COUPLE PIÑA COLADAS HERE, JUST FOR THE LADIES. 00:07:48.634 --> 00:07:50.970 line:79% position:10% size:80% align:start >> LOOKS LIKE YOU COULD USE SOME JUST FOR MEN. 00:07:51.037 --> 00:07:53.339 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start [ BOTH LAUGH ] >> AND YOU BITCHES CAN PAY FOR 00:07:53.406 --> 00:07:56.542 line:85% position:30% size:40% YOUR OWN DRINKS. 00:07:56.609 --> 00:07:59.545 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start >> NAME'S AQUAMAN, AND I KNOW HOW TO TALK TO TUNA. 00:07:59.612 --> 00:08:01.547 line:79% position:25% size:30% [ BABBLING ] [ WARBLE! ] 00:08:01.614 --> 00:08:02.715 line:85% position:38% size:53% M-MARTIAN MANHUNTER?! 00:08:02.782 --> 00:08:03.883 line:85% position:35% size:50% WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! 00:08:03.950 --> 00:08:06.285 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start >> I HAVE A LIFE OUTSIDE THE TEAM, YOU KNOW. 00:08:06.352 --> 00:08:08.187 line:79% position:10% size:50% align:start [ LAUGHTER ] >> YOU'RE THE WORST. 00:08:08.254 --> 00:08:09.655 line:85% position:45% size:68% >> AQUAMAN GOT MANHUNTER'd! 00:08:09.722 --> 00:08:10.823 line:85% position:38% size:53% >> YOU ARE THE WORST. 00:08:10.890 --> 00:08:11.924 line:85% position:35% size:48% >> I'M OUT OF HERE. 00:08:11.991 --> 00:08:13.860 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start THERE'S PLENTY OF FISH IN THE SEA! 00:08:13.926 --> 00:08:16.329 line:79% position:10% size:63% align:start >> DID HE MEAN THAT METAPHORICALLY OR, UH...? 00:08:16.395 --> 00:08:17.864 line:79% position:30% size:38% >> [ BABBLES ] >> [ CHITTERS ] 00:08:17.930 --> 00:08:19.832 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start >> [ SCOFFS ] I DO NOT JUST CALL WHEN I'VE 00:08:19.899 --> 00:08:20.733 line:85% position:28% size:35% BEEN DRINKING. 00:08:20.800 --> 00:08:23.336 line:79% position:30% size:38% >> [ CHITTERS ] >> [ BABBLES ] 00:08:23.402 --> 00:08:26.005 line:79% position:10% size:50% align:start >> MEANWHILE, AT THE LEGION OF DOOM... 00:08:26.072 --> 00:08:29.942 line:79% position:50% size:78% >> AND THIS NEW PLAN WILL CRUSH THE JUSTICE LEAGUE ONCE AND FOR 00:08:30.009 --> 00:08:31.410 line:85% position:15% size:10% ALL. 00:08:31.477 --> 00:08:34.380 line:79% position:50% size:78% BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY, IT'S TIME TO DRAW NAMES FOR SECRET SANTA! 00:08:34.447 --> 00:08:37.016 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start [ VILLAINS GROAN ] IT'S TEAM-BUILDING, PEOPLE. 00:08:37.083 --> 00:08:38.451 line:85% position:45% size:70% >> SHAKE IT UP. SHAKE IT UP. 00:08:38.517 --> 00:08:39.185 line:85% position:20% size:18% MM-HMM. 00:08:39.252 --> 00:08:40.519 line:85% position:40% size:58% >> I GOT LEONARD SNART. 00:08:40.586 --> 00:08:41.721 line:85% position:35% size:50% WHO'S LEONARD SNART? 00:08:41.787 --> 00:08:44.290 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start IS HE THE KID IN THE MAILROOM WITH THE B.O.? 00:08:44.357 --> 00:08:47.393 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start EVERY DAY, I'M LIKE, "I SMELL THE MAIL COMING," AND SURE 00:08:47.460 --> 00:08:49.328 line:79% position:10% size:53% align:start ENOUGH -- >> I'M LEONARD SNART. 00:08:49.395 --> 00:08:49.996 line:85% position:18% size:15% >> AH! 00:08:50.062 --> 00:08:52.331 line:85% position:35% size:48% HOW COULD I FORGET? 00:08:52.398 --> 00:08:55.167 line:79% position:10% size:65% align:start I THINK THAT KID'S NAME IS GLENN. 00:08:55.234 --> 00:08:58.471 line:79% position:13% size:80% align:start >> OH, SOMEBODY'S GOING TO GET A BIG SURPRISE! 00:08:58.537 --> 00:09:01.040 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start [ LAUGHS ] >> OH, AND NEW RULE THIS YEAR, 00:09:01.107 --> 00:09:02.675 line:85% position:50% size:78% EVERYBODY -- NO EXPLODING TOYS. 00:09:02.742 --> 00:09:03.876 line:85% position:20% size:18% >> HEY! 00:09:03.943 --> 00:09:06.445 line:79% position:10% size:65% align:start I'M LITERALLY THE ONLY ONE AFFECTED BY THAT RULE! 00:09:06.512 --> 00:09:09.849 line:79% position:48% size:73% >> I STILL HAVE A SCAR IN MY FOREHEAD FROM CHRISTMAS 2004, 00:09:09.916 --> 00:09:11.017 line:85% position:33% size:45% YOU DUMB BUTTHOLE. 00:09:11.083 --> 00:09:13.286 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start >> IT'S -- IT'S HOW I EXPRESS LOVE. 00:09:13.352 --> 00:09:14.787 line:85% position:48% size:73% >> HAS EVERYONE DRAWN A NAME? 00:09:14.854 --> 00:09:16.188 line:79% position:10% size:30% align:start [ SNIFFS ] OH. OH, GOD! 00:09:16.255 --> 00:09:18.190 line:79% position:10% size:53% align:start WH-WHAT SMELLS LIKE A TURD-LOVER'S PIZZA? 00:09:18.257 --> 00:09:19.225 line:85% position:28% size:33% >> HEY, GUYS. 00:09:19.292 --> 00:09:21.260 line:79% position:18% size:80% align:start WE DOING SECRET SANTA AGAIN THIS YEAR? 00:09:21.327 --> 00:09:25.364 line:79% position:10% size:65% align:start [ VILLAINS MUMBLE ] OH! NONCOMMITTAL MUMBLING. 00:09:25.431 --> 00:09:28.567 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start YEAH, IT'S THE GIFT THAT KEEPS ON GIVING. 00:09:28.634 --> 00:09:35.041 line:79% position:20% size:80% align:start >> [ COUGHS ] >> I HAVE A GLANDULAR CONDITION, 00:09:35.107 --> 00:09:35.775 line:85% position:23% size:23% YOU GUYS! 00:09:35.841 --> 00:09:37.009 line:85% position:35% size:48% IT IS NOT MY FAULT! 00:09:37.076 --> 00:09:38.444 line:85% position:40% size:58% YOU THINK I DON'T TRY?! 00:09:38.511 --> 00:09:41.113 line:85% position:35% size:48% I SHOWER EVERY DAY! 00:09:41.180 --> 00:09:47.153 line:79% position:10% size:48% align:start [ SNIFFLES ] I SHOWER EVERY DAY! 00:09:47.219 --> 00:09:49.021 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start [ WHEELS SQUEAKING ] >> LEARN MORE ABOUT GLENN AND 00:09:54.327 --> 00:09:56.796 line:79% position:48% size:73% HIS BATTLE AGAINST BODY ODOR, RIGHT AFTER THESE COMMERCIAL 00:09:56.862 --> 00:09:58.664 line:85% position:23% size:23% MESSAGES. 00:10:03.336 --> 00:10:06.038 line:79% position:50% size:78% ANY WAY THAT MAKES SENSE OF IT, SO I'LL JUST GIVE YOU THE FACTS 00:10:06.105 --> 00:10:07.273 line:85% position:30% size:38% AS I HAVE THEM. 00:10:07.340 --> 00:10:10.776 line:79% position:10% size:78% align:start GLENN KILLED HIMSELF DURING THE COMMERCIAL BREAK. 00:10:10.843 --> 00:10:11.577 line:85% position:23% size:25% >> MY GOD! 00:10:11.644 --> 00:10:12.745 line:85% position:30% size:38% WHAT WAS THAT?! 00:10:12.812 --> 00:10:16.782 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start >> I DON'T KNOW, BUT I'LL FIND OUT, MR. JORDAN. 00:10:16.849 --> 00:10:20.753 line:79% position:10% size:63% align:start >> [ MUNCHES ] >> WHOA! THIS IS SO COOL! 00:10:20.820 --> 00:10:23.656 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start NOT QUITE "INDEPENDENCE DAY" COOL, BUT MUCH COOLER THAN 00:10:23.723 --> 00:10:25.124 line:85% position:43% size:65% "BATTLE LOS ANGELES" COOL. 00:10:25.191 --> 00:10:28.361 line:79% position:50% size:80% IF "BATTLE LOS ANGELES" WAS ZERO COOL AND "INDEPENDENCE DAY" WAS 00:10:28.427 --> 00:10:30.696 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start 10 COOL, THEN THIS WOULD BE ABOUT A 7 COOL! 00:10:30.763 --> 00:10:31.797 line:85% position:35% size:48% >> I AM ABIN SUR... 00:10:31.864 --> 00:10:33.265 line:85% position:33% size:43% >> IT'S A 9 COOL. 00:10:33.332 --> 00:10:34.767 line:79% position:10% size:50% align:start >> ...FROM THE GREEN LANTERN CORPS. 00:10:34.834 --> 00:10:35.701 line:85% position:38% size:55% >> EXPOSITION! YIPPEE! 00:10:35.768 --> 00:10:36.936 line:85% position:50% size:78% >> THE RING, THE COSMIC RING... 00:10:37.003 --> 00:10:37.837 line:85% position:50% size:70% >> OH, MY GOSH! OH, MY GOSH! 00:10:37.903 --> 00:10:38.938 line:85% position:25% size:30% OH, MY GOSH! 00:10:39.005 --> 00:10:40.339 line:79% position:13% size:78% align:start >> ...HAS CHOSEN YOU AS ITS NEW MASTER... 00:10:40.406 --> 00:10:41.474 line:85% position:50% size:70% >> OH, MY GOSH! OH, MY GOSH! 00:10:41.540 --> 00:10:43.676 line:85% position:35% size:48% >> ...HAL JORDAN... 00:10:43.743 --> 00:10:46.245 line:79% position:13% size:80% align:start >> HMM. LAST WORDS SPOKEN IN HIS NATIVE TONGUE. 00:10:46.312 --> 00:10:49.315 line:79% position:18% size:80% align:start WE'LL TRAGICALLY NEVER KNOW WHAT "HAL JORDAN" MEANS IN ENGLISH. 00:10:49.382 --> 00:10:50.549 line:85% position:33% size:43% WHAT'S THIS MEAN? 00:10:50.616 --> 00:10:53.019 line:79% position:15% size:80% align:start IT'S GLOWING, AND IT SEEMS TO BE TAKING OVER MY -- 00:10:53.085 --> 00:10:53.819 line:85% position:25% size:30% OH, MY GOSH! 00:10:53.886 --> 00:10:59.925 line:79% position:10% size:33% align:start OH, MY -- [ SCREAMING ] 00:10:59.992 --> 00:11:01.227 line:85% position:45% size:68% >> HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY. 00:11:01.293 --> 00:11:02.495 line:85% position:25% size:28% OKAY. OKAY. 00:11:02.561 --> 00:11:04.230 line:85% position:48% size:75% CAN YOU PLEASE STOP SCREAMING? 00:11:04.296 --> 00:11:06.866 line:79% position:10% size:55% align:start >> [ SCREAMING STOPS ] >> UGH. THANK YOU. 00:11:06.932 --> 00:11:08.100 line:85% position:18% size:13% PHEW! 00:11:08.167 --> 00:11:11.604 line:79% position:13% size:78% align:start [ CLEARS THROAT ] YOU WILL BE TRAINED TO USE YOUR 00:11:11.670 --> 00:11:13.005 line:85% position:30% size:40% RING BY KILOWOG. 00:11:13.072 --> 00:11:15.508 line:79% position:10% size:40% align:start >> [ GROWLS ] >> [ SCREAMING ] 00:11:15.574 --> 00:11:18.077 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start >> OOH, IT'S LIKE SCRATCHING A CHALKBOARD AGAINST ANOTHER 00:11:18.144 --> 00:11:19.378 line:85% position:25% size:28% CHALKBOARD. 00:11:19.445 --> 00:11:21.747 line:79% position:13% size:80% align:start >> [ SCREAMING STOPS ] >> IF YOU ARE ATTACKED, THE RING 00:11:21.814 --> 00:11:26.318 line:79% position:10% size:78% align:start WILL RESPOND TO YOUR THOUGHTS AND IMAGINATION TO PROTECT YOU. 00:11:26.385 --> 00:11:27.286 line:85% position:18% size:15% BEGIN! 00:11:27.353 --> 00:11:30.489 line:79% position:10% size:53% align:start [ WARBLE! ] >> COOL! I DODGED IT! 00:11:30.556 --> 00:11:32.792 line:85% position:43% size:63% PROTECT ME, SELENA GOMEZ! 00:11:32.858 --> 00:11:35.594 line:85% position:50% size:78% >> I MEANT WEAPONS, YOU POOZER! 00:11:35.661 --> 00:11:36.996 line:85% position:28% size:33% HEY, NOW! OW! 00:11:37.063 --> 00:11:37.763 line:85% position:18% size:13% WAAH! 00:11:37.830 --> 00:11:42.768 line:79% position:10% size:28% align:start [ WARBLE! ] >> OHH! 00:11:42.835 --> 00:11:43.903 line:85% position:15% size:10% OHH! 00:11:43.969 --> 00:11:47.440 line:79% position:25% size:28% [ WARBLE! ] [ WARBLE! ] 00:11:47.506 --> 00:11:49.942 line:85% position:15% size:10% OHH! 00:11:50.009 --> 00:11:53.112 line:79% position:10% size:80% align:start >> I'M NOT SURE THAT THE EARTHLINGS ARE WORTHY OF A RING. 00:11:53.179 --> 00:11:54.213 line:85% position:33% size:45% >> MAKE THEM KISS. 00:11:54.280 --> 00:11:55.915 line:85% position:50% size:78% >> WHY, YES, IT IS HOT IN HERE! 00:11:55.981 --> 00:11:59.418 line:79% position:18% size:80% align:start >> I JUST HOPE THEY GAVE ABIN SUR THE BURIAL HE DESERVED. 00:11:59.485 --> 00:12:06.025 line:79% position:10% size:45% align:start [ BEARS GROWLING ] >> [ ROARS ] 00:12:06.092 --> 00:12:08.928 line:79% position:50% size:73% >> YOUR ENHANCED STRENGTH AND KRYPTONITE LASERS MAKE YOU A 00:12:08.994 --> 00:12:12.465 line:79% position:10% size:60% align:start MATCH FOR EVEN SUPERMAN, MR. LUTHOR. 00:12:12.531 --> 00:12:13.666 line:85% position:20% size:18% >> YES. 00:12:13.732 --> 00:12:15.267 line:85% position:33% size:45% A FLAWLESS DESIGN. 00:12:15.334 --> 00:12:16.435 line:85% position:15% size:8% OW! 00:12:16.502 --> 00:12:18.471 line:79% position:13% size:80% align:start >> TYLER, I TOLD YOU NOT TO PLAY BALL IN HERE! 00:12:18.537 --> 00:12:19.905 line:85% position:43% size:63% I'M SO SORRY, MR. LUTHOR. 00:12:19.972 --> 00:12:21.440 line:85% position:45% size:68% I-IT'S MY DAY TO WATCH HIM. 00:12:21.507 --> 00:12:25.911 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start >> JUST STOP TALKING FOR ONE SECOND! 00:12:25.978 --> 00:12:30.116 line:85% position:40% size:58% >> HA HA! THAT TICKLES! 00:12:30.182 --> 00:12:34.520 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start WHAT, UH -- WHAT'S GOING ON HERE? 00:12:34.587 --> 00:12:37.523 line:79% position:50% size:78% >> OKAY, JUST TO BE COMPLETELY CLEAR, ALL WE'RE GONNA DO IS GO 00:12:37.590 --> 00:12:40.493 line:79% position:10% size:80% align:start OVER TO THE HALL OF JUSTICE, PLANT A NEGA-BOMB, AND KILL THEM 00:12:40.559 --> 00:12:41.193 line:85% position:25% size:30% ALL AT ONCE. 00:12:41.260 --> 00:12:41.927 line:85% position:33% size:43% THAT'S IT, RIGHT? 00:12:41.994 --> 00:12:43.362 line:85% position:25% size:28% >> EXACTLY. 00:12:43.429 --> 00:12:45.764 line:79% position:10% size:80% align:start AND WE'RE SNEAKING OVER AT NIGHT WHEN IT'S DARK, LIKE SINESTRO 00:12:45.831 --> 00:12:46.432 line:85% position:18% size:13% SAID. 00:12:46.499 --> 00:12:47.900 line:85% position:35% size:50% GREAT IDEA, 'NESTRO. 00:12:47.967 --> 00:12:51.070 line:79% position:50% size:80% >> AND IT NEVER HURTS TO LEAVE A FEW RIDDLES WITH EMBEDDED CLUES 00:12:51.137 --> 00:12:52.304 line:85% position:50% size:65% ON HOW TO DEFUSE THE BOMB. 00:12:52.371 --> 00:12:53.706 line:85% position:25% size:30% RIGHT, GANG? 00:12:53.772 --> 00:12:56.175 line:79% position:10% size:78% align:start >> LOOK, EDDIE, WE'RE NOT DOING THE "RIDDLE" THING ANYMORE. 00:12:56.242 --> 00:12:59.145 line:79% position:10% size:78% align:start YOU DON'T HAVE TO GET YOUR DICK PRINTS OVER EVERYTHING WE DO. 00:12:59.211 --> 00:13:03.782 line:79% position:10% size:78% align:start >> BUT WITHOUT MY RIDDLES, I MIGHT AS WELL NOT EVEN SHOW UP. 00:13:03.849 --> 00:13:05.151 line:85% position:18% size:13% FINE! 00:13:05.217 --> 00:13:08.721 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start RIDDLE ME THIS -- WHICH LOSERS ARE GONNA BE TOTALLY JEALOUS 00:13:08.787 --> 00:13:12.458 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start WHEN I DEFEAT THE JLA WITHOUT THEM? 00:13:12.525 --> 00:13:17.396 line:85% position:28% size:35% IT'S YOU GUYS! 00:13:17.463 --> 00:13:20.466 line:79% position:13% size:80% align:start >> "RIDDLE ME THIS -- WHO IS THE PUNCTUATION POSSE?" 00:13:20.533 --> 00:13:22.835 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start >> PERHAPS I CAN ANSWER YOUR QUESTION! 00:13:22.902 --> 00:13:25.304 line:79% position:10% size:60% align:start [ SINISTER MUSIC PLAYS ] >> THE RIDDLER! 00:13:25.371 --> 00:13:27.072 line:85% position:48% size:75% >> INTENSE EMOTION, DO I HEAR? 00:13:27.139 --> 00:13:28.941 line:85% position:50% size:80% THEN THE EXCLAIMER MUST BE NEAR. 00:13:29.008 --> 00:13:30.075 line:85% position:33% size:43% >> THE EXCLAIMER? 00:13:30.142 --> 00:13:32.678 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start WAIT. CAN WE HIT "PAUSE" HERE FOR A SECOND? 00:13:32.745 --> 00:13:34.380 line:85% position:48% size:73% >> PAUSING IS MY GAME, FLASH. 00:13:34.446 --> 00:13:35.748 line:85% position:43% size:63% AND THE COMMA IS MY NAME. 00:13:35.814 --> 00:13:36.882 line:85% position:33% size:43% >> OH, FORGET IT! 00:13:36.949 --> 00:13:39.151 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start [ MUSIC STOPS ] I'M SHUTTING DOWN THIS TURD 00:13:39.218 --> 00:13:42.154 line:79% position:10% size:65% align:start FACTORY BEFORE IT GETS ANY WORSE. 00:13:42.221 --> 00:13:44.390 line:85% position:50% size:78% >> DID SOMEONE USE A QUOTE YET? 00:13:44.456 --> 00:13:47.259 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start WE CAN'T HEAR JACK SHIT BACK HERE. 00:13:47.326 --> 00:13:50.729 line:79% position:48% size:75% >> SO, IF WE JUST TURN OFF THE LIGHTS WHEN WE LEAVE A ROOM -- 00:13:50.796 --> 00:13:53.599 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start >> WAIT. THEY SAID BANE HAD CRIPPLED ME FOR LIFE. 00:13:53.666 --> 00:13:56.702 line:79% position:18% size:78% align:start BUT THAT MONSTER ISN'T GOING TO OWN ME. 00:13:56.769 --> 00:13:58.571 line:85% position:23% size:23% I'M BACK. 00:14:03.876 --> 00:14:04.510 line:85% position:25% size:28% OH, MY GOD! 00:14:04.577 --> 00:14:05.678 line:85% position:38% size:55% THIS IS NOT HAPPENING! 00:14:05.744 --> 00:14:06.779 line:79% position:10% size:25% align:start [ CRACK! ] AAAH! 00:14:06.845 --> 00:14:08.614 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start WHERE WERE YOU GUYS ON THAT ONE?! 00:14:08.681 --> 00:14:09.715 line:85% position:35% size:50% YOU JUST WATCHED IT! 00:14:09.782 --> 00:14:11.116 line:85% position:45% size:68% THIS IS A WAKING NIGHTMARE! 00:14:11.183 --> 00:14:15.654 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start >> ♪ DO DO DO-DO, THAT'S BANE >> BUT COME ON, GUYS. 00:14:15.721 --> 00:14:17.389 line:85% position:45% size:68% I'VE HAD IT SINCE I WAS 13. 00:14:17.456 --> 00:14:20.492 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start >> RIDDLE ME THIS, MIRROR MASTER -- WHAT'S PINK, 00:14:20.559 --> 00:14:22.328 line:85% position:48% size:73% QUIVERING, AND NEEDS A SHAVE? 00:14:22.394 --> 00:14:25.397 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start >> TWO THINGS -- SINESTRO AND SINESTRO'S VAGINA. 00:14:25.464 --> 00:14:26.265 line:85% position:23% size:23% LET'S GO. 00:14:26.332 --> 00:14:30.469 line:85% position:50% size:78% >> OKAY, OKAY. I'M GONNA DO IT. 00:14:30.536 --> 00:14:31.203 line:85% position:20% size:18% >> AAH! 00:14:31.270 --> 00:14:32.137 line:85% position:40% size:58% >> AAH! OH, OH, OH, OH! 00:14:32.204 --> 00:14:33.205 line:79% position:10% size:23% align:start AAH FUCK! >> OH. 00:14:33.272 --> 00:14:34.173 line:85% position:33% size:45% >> CALL 911, GUYS. 00:14:34.240 --> 00:14:35.808 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start >> OH, I'M NOT SO GOOD WITH BLOOD. 00:14:35.874 --> 00:14:37.610 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start >> GONNA NEED MORE T.P. HERE, FELLAS. 00:14:37.676 --> 00:14:38.844 line:85% position:43% size:65% >> UH-OH. I'M OUT OF HERE. 00:14:38.911 --> 00:14:39.612 line:85% position:35% size:50% >> HELP ME! HELP ME! 00:14:39.678 --> 00:14:40.913 line:85% position:15% size:10% AAH. 00:14:40.980 --> 00:14:43.882 line:79% position:50% size:68% >> RIDDLE ME THIS -- WHAT'S COVERED IN QUESTION MARKS, 00:14:43.949 --> 00:14:46.085 line:85% position:50% size:80% SNIFFS GLUE, AND WAS NEVER HERE? 00:14:52.191 --> 00:14:54.026 line:79% position:10% size:50% align:start >> MEANWHILE, AT THE HALL OF JUSTICE... 00:14:54.093 --> 00:14:56.562 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start >> MAYBE THE CRUISE SHIPS WOULDN'T SINK IF THEY DIDN'T 00:14:56.629 --> 00:14:59.064 line:79% position:15% size:78% align:start SHOVE A QUARTER-TON OF SELF-LOATHING INTO EVERY CABIN. 00:14:59.131 --> 00:15:00.866 line:79% position:10% size:60% align:start >> HOW DO THEY EVEN WIPE THEMSELVES? 00:15:00.933 --> 00:15:03.369 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start >> OOH, SOMEONE SAY, "CRUISE SHIP," LIKE IN THE OCEAN? 00:15:03.435 --> 00:15:04.536 line:85% position:43% size:63% WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME? 00:15:04.603 --> 00:15:06.605 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start >> OH, TO TELL THE FISH TO GET OUT OF THE WAY? 00:15:06.672 --> 00:15:07.740 line:85% position:40% size:60% NO, THEY FIGURED IT OUT. 00:15:07.806 --> 00:15:09.341 line:79% position:10% size:48% align:start >> [ LAUGHS ] NICE ONE, SUPERMAN. 00:15:09.408 --> 00:15:10.643 line:85% position:48% size:73% >> OH, SORRY, GUYS. BAD NEWS. 00:15:10.709 --> 00:15:12.678 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start >> [ GASPING ] >> THE TOILET'S STILL CLOGGED. 00:15:12.745 --> 00:15:15.281 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start >> THAT WAS AN ANCIENT RELIC PASSED DOWN FROM MY ANCESTORS! 00:15:15.347 --> 00:15:17.783 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start >> WELL, YOUR ANCESTORS DIDN'T KNOW CRAP ABOUT PLUMBING. 00:15:17.850 --> 00:15:19.785 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start >> BUT I'VE GOT FRIENDS COMING OVER TONIGHT! 00:15:19.852 --> 00:15:21.887 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start >> THESE LOBSTERS WALKED RIGHT UP TO THE DOOR. 00:15:21.954 --> 00:15:22.621 line:85% position:28% size:35% ANYONE HUNGRY? 00:15:22.688 --> 00:15:25.591 line:85% position:40% size:60% >> THE JOHNSONS! OH, NO! 00:15:25.658 --> 00:15:28.160 line:85% position:48% size:73% ED JOHNSON PERFORMED MY BRIS! 00:15:28.227 --> 00:15:30.829 line:85% position:40% size:58% >> AQUAMAN, I HEAR YOU. 00:15:30.896 --> 00:15:32.331 line:85% position:48% size:75% CAN WE STILL EAT THE LOBSTERS? 00:15:32.398 --> 00:15:33.565 line:85% position:45% size:70% >> SOMEBODY SAID, "LOBSTER"? 00:15:33.632 --> 00:15:34.667 line:85% position:28% size:33% >> THAT'S IT! 00:15:34.733 --> 00:15:36.769 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start YOU TREAT ME LIKE I'M NOT EVEN ON THE TEAM! 00:15:36.835 --> 00:15:39.538 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start EVERY DAY, IT'S "AQUA LOSER" THIS AND "AQUA PUSS" THAT! 00:15:39.605 --> 00:15:40.406 line:85% position:35% size:50% >> CAREFUL, AQUAMAN. 00:15:40.472 --> 00:15:41.573 line:85% position:25% size:30% FLOOR'S WET. 00:15:41.640 --> 00:15:43.709 line:79% position:20% size:78% align:start >> I AM THE KING OF THE FUCKING OCEAN, CYBORG! 00:15:43.776 --> 00:15:46.078 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start DO YOU THINK I'VE NEVER SEEN A PUDDLE BEFORE?! 00:15:46.145 --> 00:15:51.050 line:79% position:10% size:50% align:start [ SQUEAK! THUD! ] OW! OW! MY TAILBONE! 00:15:51.116 --> 00:15:55.154 line:85% position:43% size:65% [ Sobbing ] M-MY TAILBONE. 00:15:55.220 --> 00:15:56.121 line:85% position:25% size:28% OW, PLEASE. 00:15:56.188 --> 00:15:57.389 line:85% position:30% size:40% NEED A HOSPITAL. 00:15:57.456 --> 00:15:59.391 line:85% position:45% size:70% >> JUST USE YOUR AquaMobile. 00:15:59.458 --> 00:16:02.094 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start >> HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO RIDE A SEA-DOO? 00:16:02.161 --> 00:16:06.865 line:79% position:10% size:58% align:start [ DOOR CLOSES ] [ SOBBING ] THAT IS IT. 00:16:06.932 --> 00:16:08.434 line:85% position:25% size:28% THAT IS IT! 00:16:08.500 --> 00:16:12.037 line:85% position:28% size:33% >> AND NOW... 00:16:12.104 --> 00:16:13.238 line:85% position:38% size:53% >> WHY, HELLO, THERE. 00:16:13.305 --> 00:16:14.707 line:85% position:28% size:35% I'M MR. BANJO. 00:16:14.773 --> 00:16:18.310 line:79% position:50% size:80% I'LL STEAL AMERICA'S SECRETS AND SEND THEM TO FOREIGN ENEMIES BY 00:16:18.377 --> 00:16:20.879 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start PLAYING MORSE CODE ON MY BANJO PLAYIN'. 00:16:20.946 --> 00:16:23.515 line:85% position:40% size:60% [ LAUGHS ] THAT'S RIGHT. 00:16:23.582 --> 00:16:25.617 line:85% position:28% size:35% >> NO. NO WAY. 00:16:25.684 --> 00:16:28.153 line:79% position:10% size:60% align:start YOU LUMP ME IN HERE WITH FATTY ARBUCKLE? 00:16:28.220 --> 00:16:28.954 line:85% position:23% size:25% I CAN FLY! 00:16:29.021 --> 00:16:30.589 line:85% position:50% size:68% I CAN SHOOT NUCLEAR BLASTS! 00:16:30.656 --> 00:16:33.759 line:79% position:10% size:78% align:start I CAN LITERALLY -- LITERALLY -- TURN LEAD INTO GOLD! 00:16:33.826 --> 00:16:36.395 line:79% position:18% size:80% align:start >> [ LAUGHS ] WELL, YOU JUST HANG ON THERE, MY 00:16:36.462 --> 00:16:37.796 line:85% position:20% size:18% FRIEND. 00:16:37.863 --> 00:16:40.799 line:79% position:48% size:75% THIS BANJO COST ME ALMOST $60, SO WE BOTH BRING A LOT TO THE 00:16:40.866 --> 00:16:41.834 line:85% position:18% size:15% TABLE. 00:16:41.900 --> 00:16:43.435 line:79% position:25% size:28% [ WHOOSH! ] [ CLONK! ] 00:16:43.502 --> 00:16:45.037 line:79% position:10% size:63% align:start >> NOW, WHERE THE FUCK IS B'DG?! 00:16:45.104 --> 00:16:48.140 line:79% position:18% size:80% align:start >> DOWN THE HALL, FIRST DRESSING ROOM ON THE RIGHT. 00:16:48.207 --> 00:16:50.008 line:85% position:48% size:75% >> OH, HELLO. MY NAME IS B'DG. 00:16:50.075 --> 00:16:51.377 line:79% position:10% size:25% align:start [ CLONK! ] AAH! 00:16:51.443 --> 00:16:54.546 line:79% position:13% size:80% align:start >> AND, UM, WHOEVER'S BEEN PICKING THEIR NOSE AT THE URINAL 00:16:54.613 --> 00:16:57.349 line:79% position:15% size:78% align:start AND WIPING IT ON THE WALL, STOP IT. 00:16:57.416 --> 00:16:58.951 line:79% position:28% size:33% >> [ LAUGHS ] THAT'S EVIL. 00:16:59.017 --> 00:17:00.185 line:85% position:35% size:48% >> IT'S DISGUSTING. 00:17:00.252 --> 00:17:02.755 line:79% position:10% size:65% align:start >> GUYS, WHAT IS THE WI-FI PASSWORD IN HERE, AGAIN? 00:17:02.821 --> 00:17:06.191 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start >> MEOW, catwomanisABitch, ALL ONE WORD, CAPITAL "B." 00:17:06.258 --> 00:17:07.793 line:79% position:10% size:43% align:start >> [ CHUCKLES ] NOW, THAT'S EVIL. 00:17:07.860 --> 00:17:09.461 line:79% position:33% size:45% [ SIREN BLARING ] >> RING DING DING! 00:17:09.528 --> 00:17:10.662 line:85% position:45% size:68% >> IT'S THE JUSTICE LEAGUE. 00:17:10.729 --> 00:17:12.731 line:85% position:35% size:48% WE'RE UNDER ATTACK. 00:17:12.798 --> 00:17:14.366 line:85% position:35% size:50% >> QUIET, YOU FOOLS! 00:17:14.433 --> 00:17:23.342 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start [ BEEPING ] SEE? AQUAMAN HAS COME ALONE. 00:17:23.409 --> 00:17:24.443 line:85% position:33% size:45% >> GIGANTA, RIGHT? 00:17:24.510 --> 00:17:25.511 line:85% position:33% size:43% >> SHOO! GO AWAY! 00:17:25.577 --> 00:17:26.311 line:85% position:25% size:28% >> OW! HEY! 00:17:26.378 --> 00:17:27.746 line:85% position:43% size:63% HEY, I JUST WANT TO TALK! 00:17:27.813 --> 00:17:31.750 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start >> ALL RIGHT, BUT THERE'S AN ENTRANCE FEE. 00:17:31.817 --> 00:17:33.352 line:85% position:43% size:63% >> GIGANTA, YOU DUMB COW! 00:17:33.419 --> 00:17:35.721 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start YOU'VE LED MY ARCHENEMY RIGHT TO US! 00:17:35.788 --> 00:17:38.056 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start BUT I'LL LIVE TO FIGHT ANOTHER DAY! 00:17:38.123 --> 00:17:44.062 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start [ DOOR OPENS, CLOSES ] >> AQUAMAN, YOU ARE NOW OUR 00:17:44.129 --> 00:17:45.397 line:85% position:20% size:20% HOSTAGE. 00:17:45.464 --> 00:17:49.601 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start >> I'M ALREADY A HOSTAGE, LUTHOR, A HOSTAGE TO THE JLA's 00:17:49.668 --> 00:17:50.469 line:85% position:20% size:20% INSULTS! 00:17:50.536 --> 00:17:51.737 line:85% position:25% size:30% BUT NO MORE! 00:17:51.804 --> 00:17:57.209 line:79% position:18% size:78% align:start AQUAMAN IS THE NEWEST MEMBER OF THE LEGION OF DOOM! 00:17:57.276 --> 00:18:00.078 line:85% position:40% size:60% GA-GOO! KRRKRR! KRRSHOO! 00:18:00.145 --> 00:18:02.815 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start >> L-LOOK, I-I DON'T WANT TO HURT YOUR FEELINGS, BUT -- 00:18:02.881 --> 00:18:05.651 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start >> I HAVE THE CODE'S TO THE WATCHTOWER'S SERVICE ENTRANCE. 00:18:05.717 --> 00:18:06.785 line:85% position:38% size:55% >> BUT WELCOME ABOARD! 00:18:06.852 --> 00:18:11.356 line:79% position:10% size:48% align:start [ THUNDER CRASHES ] [ LAUGHTER ] 00:18:11.423 --> 00:18:17.463 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start [ THUNDER CRASHES ] WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON OUT 00:18:17.529 --> 00:18:18.197 line:85% position:18% size:15% THERE? 00:18:18.263 --> 00:18:19.698 line:85% position:40% size:58% I LEFT MY WINDOWS DOWN! 00:18:19.765 --> 00:18:22.701 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start [ DOOR OPENS, CLOSES ] >> NO, OUR DOCUMENTS SAY YOU 00:18:22.768 --> 00:18:26.238 line:79% position:15% size:78% align:start WERE BORN ON AUGUST 15, 1865, A TUESDAY. 00:18:26.305 --> 00:18:28.740 line:79% position:13% size:78% align:start >> [ ROARS ] >> IT SHOULD ALSO BE NOTED THAT 00:18:28.807 --> 00:18:31.343 line:79% position:10% size:63% align:start YOUR ACTUAL LEGAL NAME IS SOLOMON GRUESDAY. 00:18:31.410 --> 00:18:32.811 line:85% position:18% size:15% >> AH! 00:18:32.878 --> 00:18:33.612 line:85% position:40% size:58% >> HEY, GUYS! I'M BACK! 00:18:33.679 --> 00:18:34.713 line:85% position:33% size:45% WHERE HAVE I BEEN? 00:18:34.780 --> 00:18:36.415 line:79% position:20% size:78% align:start OH, KING OF THE OCEAN BUSINESS, YOU KNOW. 00:18:36.482 --> 00:18:38.283 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start DIDN'T JOIN THE FORCES OF EVIL OR ANYTHING. 00:18:38.350 --> 00:18:39.985 line:79% position:18% size:78% align:start >> YOU GET THE CAKE FOR ROBIN'S BAR MITZVAH? 00:18:40.052 --> 00:18:40.853 line:85% position:20% size:18% >> YEP. 00:18:40.919 --> 00:18:42.387 line:85% position:50% size:78% THAT'S ALL I'M GOOD FOR, RIGHT? 00:18:42.454 --> 00:18:43.355 line:85% position:18% size:15% TA-DA! 00:18:43.422 --> 00:18:45.123 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start >> AND THERE GOES OUR PETTY CASH. 00:18:45.190 --> 00:18:47.559 line:79% position:13% size:80% align:start >> [ SIGHS ] BETTER TOO MUCH THAN TOO LITTLE, 00:18:47.626 --> 00:18:48.360 line:85% position:18% size:15% RIGHT? 00:18:48.427 --> 00:18:49.828 line:85% position:45% size:70% >> WHY, THIS ONE'S SO BIG... 00:18:49.895 --> 00:18:50.996 line:85% position:35% size:48% >> HE'S BLOWING IT. 00:18:51.063 --> 00:18:53.832 line:79% position:15% size:78% align:start >> RIDDLE ME THIS -- WHOSE HAND IS THAT? 00:18:53.899 --> 00:18:55.234 line:85% position:48% size:75% >> MINE'S BETWEEN TWO PILLOWS. 00:18:55.300 --> 00:18:57.603 line:79% position:13% size:78% align:start >> YEAH, WE HEARD YOU THE FIRST THREE TIMES, GRODD. 00:18:57.669 --> 00:18:58.904 line:85% position:43% size:63% WE'VE ALL SEEN THE MOVIE. 00:18:58.971 --> 00:19:01.273 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start ACTUALLY, I'VE NEVER SEEN IT, BUT THAT JOKE WAS IN THE 00:19:01.340 --> 00:19:01.840 line:85% position:20% size:20% TRAILER. 00:19:01.907 --> 00:19:02.341 line:85% position:28% size:35% >> VA-VA-VA... 00:19:02.407 --> 00:19:03.308 line:85% position:20% size:20% >> FINE. 00:19:03.375 --> 00:19:05.677 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start LET'S JUST GET IT IN THE REC ROOM. 00:19:05.744 --> 00:19:07.145 line:85% position:25% size:30% >> SURPRISE! 00:19:07.212 --> 00:19:09.014 line:85% position:40% size:60% >> I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING! 00:19:09.081 --> 00:19:10.048 line:85% position:28% size:33% WHAT IS THIS? 00:19:10.115 --> 00:19:12.084 line:79% position:25% size:78% align:start >> IT'S AN AQUAMAN APPRECIATION PARTY! 00:19:12.150 --> 00:19:13.519 line:85% position:45% size:70% >> YEAH! ROBIN'S NOT JEWISH! 00:19:13.585 --> 00:19:16.255 line:79% position:13% size:78% align:start >> OH, WE GIVE YOU A HARD TIME, BUT ONLY BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU, 00:19:16.321 --> 00:19:17.055 line:85% position:15% size:10% BRO! 00:19:17.122 --> 00:19:18.290 line:85% position:45% size:70% >> YOU REALLY FEEL THAT WAY? 00:19:18.357 --> 00:19:20.592 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start >> DO I REALLY FEEL -- LOOK AT THIS GUY! OF COURSE! 00:19:20.659 --> 00:19:21.226 line:85% position:30% size:38% WE'RE A FAMILY. 00:19:21.293 --> 00:19:22.461 line:85% position:33% size:43% NOW DO THE HONOR. 00:19:22.528 --> 00:19:25.397 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start [ HEROES CHEERING ] >> SHH! SOMETHING'S HAPPENING. 00:19:25.464 --> 00:19:28.500 line:85% position:50% size:78% >> YEAH, AQUAMAN! IN THE HOUSE! 00:19:28.567 --> 00:19:29.935 line:85% position:38% size:55% >> HEY! HEY, HEY, HEY! 00:19:30.002 --> 00:19:31.003 line:85% position:35% size:48% >> QUIET, YOU FOOL! 00:19:31.069 --> 00:19:32.938 line:79% position:10% size:68% align:start >> BUT, BUT, BUT, BUT, BUT, BUT -- 00:19:33.005 --> 00:19:35.207 line:85% position:30% size:40% >> I SAID QUIET! 00:19:35.274 --> 00:19:35.974 line:85% position:20% size:18% >> AAH! 00:19:36.041 --> 00:19:37.809 line:85% position:43% size:63% >> I TOLD YOU TO -- WAIT. 00:19:37.876 --> 00:19:39.645 line:85% position:50% size:78% THEY'RE SHOVING KNIVES IN HERE? 00:19:39.711 --> 00:19:40.913 line:85% position:35% size:50% GET OUT OF THE CAKE! 00:19:40.979 --> 00:19:43.181 line:79% position:10% size:50% align:start [ HEROES GASP ] >> WE'VE BEEN CAKED! 00:19:43.248 --> 00:19:44.483 line:85% position:43% size:65% >> WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, GUYS. 00:19:44.550 --> 00:19:45.584 line:85% position:35% size:48% MY LEGS ARE ASLEEP. 00:19:45.651 --> 00:19:47.586 line:79% position:10% size:58% align:start >> NOW THEY'LL SEE WHAT MR. BANJO CAN DO. 00:19:47.653 --> 00:19:50.956 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start [ UP-TEMPO BANJO MUSIC PLAYS ] >> FACE IT, GREEN FOOL! 00:19:51.023 --> 00:19:53.458 line:79% position:15% size:80% align:start YOU'RE NO MATCH FOR THE POWER OF FEAR! 00:19:53.525 --> 00:19:54.293 line:85% position:20% size:20% >> WHOA! 00:19:54.359 --> 00:19:56.028 line:85% position:48% size:75% I CAN'T LOOK AT YOU LIKE THAT. 00:19:56.094 --> 00:19:57.262 line:85% position:33% size:45% WAS THAT A CHOICE? 00:19:57.329 --> 00:19:58.964 line:85% position:45% size:68% >> I GOT A STAPH INFECTION! 00:19:59.031 --> 00:19:59.965 line:85% position:28% size:35% I ALMOST DIED! 00:20:00.032 --> 00:20:00.699 line:85% position:18% size:15% >> OW! 00:20:00.766 --> 00:20:02.100 line:85% position:40% size:60% WHO BROUGHT A KICKBALL?! 00:20:02.167 --> 00:20:03.802 line:85% position:50% size:68% >> AM I HERE? OR OVER HERE? 00:20:03.869 --> 00:20:06.338 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start HOW WILL YOU KNOW WHICH IS THE REAL -- 00:20:06.405 --> 00:20:07.339 line:85% position:28% size:35% >> FACE PUNCH. 00:20:07.406 --> 00:20:08.840 line:85% position:25% size:30% >> OH, YEAH! 00:20:08.907 --> 00:20:09.608 line:85% position:20% size:18% >> UGH! 00:20:09.675 --> 00:20:10.976 line:85% position:43% size:63% >> SEE YOU NEXT GRUESDAY! 00:20:11.043 --> 00:20:11.677 line:85% position:23% size:25% >> FREEZE! 00:20:11.743 --> 00:20:12.344 line:85% position:23% size:23% >> CHILL! 00:20:12.411 --> 00:20:12.911 line:85% position:20% size:18% >> ICE! 00:20:12.978 --> 00:20:13.612 line:85% position:23% size:25% >> FREEZE! 00:20:13.679 --> 00:20:14.212 line:85% position:20% size:20% >> COOL! 00:20:14.279 --> 00:20:14.913 line:85% position:23% size:25% >> FREEZE! 00:20:14.980 --> 00:20:15.480 line:85% position:20% size:18% >> MEH! 00:20:15.547 --> 00:20:15.914 line:85% position:18% size:15% >> OW! 00:20:15.981 --> 00:20:16.949 line:85% position:18% size:15% >> OH! 00:20:17.015 --> 00:20:18.417 line:79% position:10% size:53% align:start >> YEAH, I'M DROPPING MOTHER FUCKA'S! 00:20:18.483 --> 00:20:19.685 line:85% position:25% size:30% WHO'S NEXT?! 00:20:19.751 --> 00:20:22.287 line:79% position:18% size:78% align:start >> I'D FIGHT YOU, WONDER WOMAN, BUT I'VE GOT A DICK. 00:20:22.354 --> 00:20:23.455 line:85% position:15% size:8% OW! 00:20:23.522 --> 00:20:24.590 line:85% position:23% size:25% OH, GREAT. 00:20:24.656 --> 00:20:27.259 line:79% position:20% size:78% align:start LIKE I WAS DROWNING IN COOCH TO START WITH. 00:20:27.326 --> 00:20:30.228 line:79% position:10% size:65% align:start NOW I'VE GOT A NOSE LIKE A FUCKIN' CAN OPENER. 00:20:30.295 --> 00:20:30.862 line:85% position:18% size:15% >> EH. 00:20:30.929 --> 00:20:32.164 line:79% position:10% size:23% align:start [ SIGHS ] OH! 00:20:32.230 --> 00:20:33.198 line:85% position:20% size:20% >> MM... 00:20:33.265 --> 00:20:36.034 line:79% position:10% size:65% align:start [ SMOOCHES ] >> WAS I SUPPOSED TO FIGHT 00:20:36.101 --> 00:20:36.935 line:85% position:23% size:23% DARKSEID? 00:20:37.002 --> 00:20:39.338 line:85% position:50% size:78% 'CAUSE I'M A GUY IN A CAT SUIT. 00:20:39.404 --> 00:20:40.606 line:85% position:38% size:53% >> GIVE IT UP, JOKER. 00:20:40.672 --> 00:20:41.773 line:85% position:35% size:48% YOU'LL N-- UGH! OW! 00:20:41.840 --> 00:20:43.475 line:85% position:50% size:75% IS THAT -- IS THAT PISS, DUDE? 00:20:43.542 --> 00:20:45.711 line:79% position:10% size:75% align:start DID YOU JUST SQUIRT PISS IN MY MOUTH? 00:20:45.777 --> 00:20:47.479 line:85% position:50% size:78% OH, WE ARE DONE PROFESSIONALLY! 00:20:47.546 --> 00:20:50.415 line:85% position:50% size:80% >> HAH! IT'S NOT HIS PISS, BATS. 00:20:50.482 --> 00:20:53.018 line:85% position:50% size:80% >> THAT IS ONLY SLIGHTLY BETTER. 00:20:53.085 --> 00:20:54.152 line:85% position:15% size:10% AAH! 00:20:54.219 --> 00:20:57.122 line:79% position:23% size:80% align:start AAH, RULE OF THREE, ASSHOLE, NOT FOUR! 00:20:57.189 --> 00:20:58.123 line:85% position:25% size:28% >> OW, MAN! 00:20:58.190 --> 00:20:58.991 line:85% position:23% size:23% HEY, NOW! 00:20:59.057 --> 00:21:00.792 line:85% position:20% size:20% OH! OHH! 00:21:00.859 --> 00:21:02.995 line:79% position:10% size:80% align:start >> I CAN'T CONCENTRATE WITH THAT DAMN BANJO NOISE! 00:21:03.061 --> 00:21:05.197 line:79% position:10% size:55% align:start [ MUSIC STOPS ] >> FINE. SUCK ON THIS. 00:21:05.263 --> 00:21:06.531 line:85% position:15% size:10% AAH! 00:21:06.598 --> 00:21:10.102 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start >> YET AGAIN, THE WORLD'S GREATEST VILLAIN AND EARTH'S 00:21:10.168 --> 00:21:13.538 line:79% position:10% size:80% align:start MIGHTIEST HERO MUST DO THE DANCE OF DEATH. 00:21:13.605 --> 00:21:15.507 line:79% position:10% size:45% align:start MOTHER FUCKER! THAT SPLIT MY LIP! 00:21:15.574 --> 00:21:16.475 line:85% position:30% size:38% ENOUGH OF THIS! 00:21:16.541 --> 00:21:17.676 line:85% position:38% size:53% TIME FOR THE ENDGAME. 00:21:17.743 --> 00:21:19.177 line:85% position:50% size:78% AQUAMAN, THE KRYPTONITE -- NOW! 00:21:19.244 --> 00:21:20.345 line:85% position:28% size:35% >> KRYPTONITE? 00:21:20.412 --> 00:21:22.881 line:79% position:28% size:78% align:start >> THROW ME THE KRYPTONITE, AND EVIL WILL WIN! 00:21:22.948 --> 00:21:24.483 line:85% position:48% size:73% >> NO! AQUAMAN, I'M YOUR BRO! 00:21:24.549 --> 00:21:27.352 line:79% position:10% size:70% align:start >> BRO? YOU TREATED HIM LIKE POND SCUM FOR TOO LONG. 00:21:27.419 --> 00:21:29.221 line:85% position:40% size:58% NOW HE HAS HIS REVENGE. 00:21:43.869 --> 00:21:45.504 line:85% position:33% size:43% >> SORRY, LUTHOR. 00:21:45.570 --> 00:21:47.039 line:85% position:30% size:38% I'M NO VILLAIN. 00:21:47.105 --> 00:21:48.273 line:85% position:25% size:28% I'M A HERO. 00:21:48.340 --> 00:21:50.842 line:85% position:50% size:70% AND I'M GONNA KICK YOUR ASS! 00:21:50.909 --> 00:21:52.010 line:85% position:23% size:25% AQUAPUNCH! 00:21:52.077 --> 00:21:52.844 line:85% position:18% size:13% YEAH! 00:21:52.911 --> 00:21:55.781 line:85% position:48% size:73% AQUAMAN GETS HIS GROOVE BACK! 00:21:55.847 --> 00:21:59.685 line:79% position:10% size:80% align:start OH FUCK. >> HOW CAN YOU MEASURE THE VALUE 00:21:59.751 --> 00:22:02.120 line:79% position:15% size:78% align:start OF A MAN WHO DID SO MUCH FOR SO MANY? 00:22:02.187 --> 00:22:05.724 line:79% position:23% size:80% align:start AND WHAT WILL WE DO WITHOUT HIM, WITHOUT... 00:22:05.791 --> 00:22:06.958 line:85% position:18% size:15% GLENN? 00:22:07.025 --> 00:22:08.860 line:79% position:10% size:60% align:start >> TH IS HOW THE "ROBOT CHICKEN DC COMICS 00:22:08.927 --> 00:22:10.996 line:79% position:10% size:60% align:start SPECIAL" ENDS, WITH SOME CHEAP-ASS MISDIRECT? 00:22:11.063 --> 00:22:13.198 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start WE'RE NOT EVEN GONNA FIND OUT HOW YOU SURVIVED? 00:22:13.265 --> 00:22:14.433 line:85% position:43% size:65% EVERYONE'S OKAY WITH THIS? 00:22:14.499 --> 00:22:15.701 line:85% position:45% size:68% >> SHH. DON'T WORRY, JIMMY. 00:22:15.767 --> 00:22:16.968 line:85% position:45% size:68% YOU WON'T REMEMBER A THING. 00:22:17.035 --> 00:22:19.471 line:79% position:10% size:53% align:start [ SMOOCHES ] AND NEITHER WILL YOU. 00:22:19.538 --> 00:22:20.839 line:79% position:10% size:73% align:start [ SMOOCHES ] >> ♪ YOU CAN TRY AND FIGHT ME 00:22:22.774 --> 00:22:26.578 line:15% position:10% size:70% align:start OFF ♪ ♪ BUT I-I'M A M-MAN OF STEEL 00:22:26.645 --> 00:22:30.449 line:15% position:50% size:65% ♪ I'M GON' KISS YOU, HOMES ♪ AND YOU WON'T REMEMBER A 00:22:30.515 --> 00:22:33.719 line:15% position:10% size:68% align:start THING ♪ >> HMM. YOU KNOW, THE THING 00:22:33.785 --> 00:22:37.723 line:21% position:10% size:45% align:start ABOUT GLENN WAS -- OH! DAMN IT! 00:22:37.789 --> 00:22:37.856 line:15% position:10% size:73% align:start >> ♪ BUT I DON'T WANT TO KISS YOUR THING ♪ 00:22:38.123 --> 00:22:39.891 line:10% position:10% size:73% align:start >> ♪ BUT I DON'T WANT TO KISS 00:22:39.958 --> 00:22:42.160 line:10% position:10% size:30% align:start YOUR THING ♪