[REVEILLE PLAYS]
>> ATTENTION, CAMPERS,
ATTENTION, CAMPERS--
IT'S TIME FOR CAMP LAZLO!
>> ♪ THERE WERE TO SCOUTS
WHO MADE A FRIEND
AND LAZLO WAS HIS NAME-O
L-A-Z-L-O ♪
>> ♪ L-A-Z-L-O ♪
>> ♪ AND LAZLO WAS HIS NAME-O ♪
>> ♪ AND THEN THAT TRIO
WENT TO CAMP
AND TURNED IT UPSIDE-O
L-A-Z-L-O ♪
>> ♪ L-A-Z-L-O ♪
>> ♪ L-A-Z-L-O
AND LAZLO WAS HIS NAME-O ♪
[CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP]
>> OK, SCOUTS,
THE MOMENT YOU'VE ALL
BEEN WAITING FOR:
THE ANNUAL ONION DAY TUG-O-WAR
BETWEEN THE PUTRID BEAN SCOUTS--
>> [CHEERING]
OH, YEAH, THAT'S US!
PUTRID!
>> AND THE UNDEFEATED SQUIRREL
SCOUTS!
>> YEAH, SQUIRREL SCOUTS!
SOCK IT TO THEM!
>> SIR?
>> [SNORING]
>> SIR?
>> HUH, WHAT?
WHAT, DID WE LOSE ALREADY?
>> COME ON!
LET'S GET THIS OVER WITH.
>> REALLY.
THIS IS SO ANTICLIMACTIC.
>> EVERY YEAR, IT'S THE SAME
STORY.
WE HEAVE AND HO, THEN GRETCHEN
PULLS US ALL INTO THE MUD.
WE SHOULD ALL JUST THROW IN--
>> THERE!
>> VERY NICE!
>> WHAT ARE YOU DERELICTS DOING?
>> I'M SHOWING RAJ HOW TO MAKE A
FLOWER WITH ROPE.
>> AND I WONDER WHY WE LOSE
EVERY YEAR.
>> MINE LOOKS LIKE A STINKWEED,
LAZLO.
HOW ARE YOU DOING, CLAM?
>> FRENCH KNOT.
>> INSTEAD OF PLAYING MACRAME,
WHY DON'T YOU GUYS PULL FOR A
CHANGE.
>> PULL?
>> YEAH.
YOU PULL THE ROPE LIKE THIS.
IT'S CALLED TUG-O-WAR.
>> LIKE THIS?
DING-DONG!
WHO IS IT?
>> DING-DONG!
>> LIKE THIS?
>> DING-DONG!
>> DING, DING.
>> OK, SCOUTS.
READY?
>> READY, GRETCHEN?
>> SET?
GO!
>> [GRUNTING]
>> OK.
>> [STRAING]
>> NOW!
>> [SCREAMING]
WHOA!
[GROANING]
>> ALL RIGHT, CLAM,
HOLD TIGHT!
>> [GROWLS]
>> DING-DONG.
>> [GASPS]
>> DING-DONG.
>> [GROWLING]
>> DONG.
>> CLAM!
>> CLAM, BUDDY,
ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?
>> CLAM!
SPEAK TO US.
>> YOU KEEP THAT MUTANT WHATEVER
HE IS AS FAR AWAY FROM ME AS
POSSIBLE!
>> MOST SPECIES ON THIS EARTH
WILL WANT TO STAY AS FAR AWAY--
CLAM, WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
CLAM?
CLAM!
>> WHOA, WHOA!
STOP IT RIGHT THERE, BUDDY.
YOU NEED TO GET THAT BUMP
LOOKED AT.
>> YES, CLAM.
WE ARE THIS WAY.
YOU'RE WALKING TOWARD THAT--
THAT THING!
>> COME ON, CLAM.
LET'S SEE NURSE LESLIE.
>> SO, NURSE LESLIE,
HAS THIS BUMP CAUSED BRAIN
DAMAGE?
PSORIASIS, HEAD LICE?
>> [SIGHS]
WELL, HE DOES HAVE A
NASTY-LOOKING BUMP THERE.
I TRIED TO MAKE IT LOOK BETTER
BY DRAWING A HAPPY FACE ON IT.
I DON'T KNOW.
NO, YOU'RE BUDDY'S REAL PROBLEM
IS SLIGHTLY MORE COMPLICATED.
HE'S, WELL, IN LOVE.
>> IN LOVE?!
>> GREAT GOODNESS, IT'S WORSE
THAN WE THOUGHT.
>> HOW DO YOU KNOW?
>> BAD CASE OF DOILIES.
>> I AM SHOCKED.
>> BUT WHO'S HE IN LOVE WITH?
>> WELL, WE NEED A CULTURE FOR
THAT.
HMM.
HE'S IN LOVE WITH SOME
PREHISTORIC MUTATED DINOSAUR.
>> LET ME SEE.
THAT'S GRETCHEN.
>> GRETCHEN?!
WELL, HE WAS NOT TOO FAR OFF.
>> GRETCHEN.
>> YOU'LL NEED TO KEEP HIM AS
FAR AWAY FROM HER AS POSSIBLE.
THINK YOU CAN DO THAT?
AND WE'LL NEED TO KEEP HIM
QUARANTINED FOR A COUPLE OF
WEEKS.
LOVE SICKNESS IS KNOWN TO BE
HIGHLY CONTAGIOUS.
>> QUARANTINED?
BUT WE DON'T WANT THE CAMP TO
FIND OUT HE HAS LOVE SICKNESS.
>> DON'T WORRY.
WE'LL KEEP IT DISCREET.
>> LOVE SICKNESS?
HA HA HA HA HA HA!
WHAT A LOSER!
AH HA HA HA.
>> WE BETTER STAY AWAY.
LOVE SICKNESS MAKES YOUR FINGERS
FALL OFF.
>> I HEARD IT WILL MAKE YOUR
EYEBALLS TURN INSIDE OUT.
>> POOR CLAM.
FLU SYMPTOMS, QUARANTINED.
>> [GROANING]
HELP ME.
>> LAZLO, I DO NOT THINK NURSE
LESLIE WOULD APPROVE OF US
BORROWING HIS BOOKS.
>> DON'T WORRY, CLAM.
WE'RE GONNA HELP YOU.
WE HAVE A BOOK CALLED
"QUESTIONABLE CURES."
>> GRETCHEN!
>> ARE YOU READY, RAJ?
>> ARE YOU SURE THIS WILL WORK,
LAZLO?
>> WELL, TECHNICALLY, THEY'RE
SUPPOSED TO BE CANADIAN GEESE,
BUT DUCKS WILL HAVE TO DO.
>> I HOPE THIS DUCK DIDN'T HAVE
A BIG LUNCH.
>> ARE YOU READY, CLAM?
>> GRETCHEN!
>> LOVE SICKNESS, LOVE SICKNESS,
FLY AWAY HOME.
LOVE SICKNESS, LOVE SICKNESS,
LEAVE CLAM ALONE.
>> NO CLAM LOVING!
>> AH-CHOO!
GRETCHEN.
>> I FORGOT THAT CLAM IS
ALLERGIC TO DUCKS.
>> RAJ, DIDN'T YOUR MOTHER HAVE
A TEA THAT CURED EVERYTHING?
>> YOU ARE SPEAKING OF MY
MOTHER'S KAFIZZLE RIVER CURRY
PEPPER TEA...
AND IT IS NOT TO BE MESSED WITH.
BESIDES, YOU NEED WATER FROM THE
KAFIZZLE RIVER TO MAKE IT,
WHICH WE DO NOT HAVE.
>> WHAT ABOUT YOUR KAFIZZLE
RIVER SNOW GLOBE?
>> GRETCHEN?!
>> OH!
HERE YOU GO.
BUT BE VERY CAREFUL.
>> SMELLS GOOD.
OOPS!
>> DO NOT SPILL IT!
>> WOW!
IT'S LIKE MAGMA FROM THE EARTH'S
CORE!
>> MORE POWERFUL THAN THAT.
YOU MUST BE QUITE MINDFUL.
>> MINDFUL, GOT IT.
WHOOPS!
>> DON'T SPILL IT.
>> HOT MAGMA.
>> OH, YOU SPILLED IT AGAIN.
>> SO, SORRY.
>> NOT MINDFUL, NOT MINDFUL,
NOT MINDFUL!
>> WON'T HAPPEN AGAIN.
>> PLEASE, LAZLO!
>> HERE, CLAM.
DRINK THIS.
[SLURP]
>> AH--
AH-CHOO!
GRETCHEN!
>> OK, GRANDMA.
RIGHT, RIGHT.
OK, THANKS.
I LOVE YOU, TOO.
GOT IT.
MY GRANDMOTHER SAYS THIS
BRAZILIAN PLANTAIN PERSIMMON
PEAR PIE IS THE ONLY THING THAT
CURES LOVE SICKNESS.
>> BUT WHERE ARE WE GOING TO GET
THE BRAZILIAN PEAR PERSMELLO
WHATEVER PIE?
>> HEY, CLAM, YOU HANG TIGHT!
WE'RE GONNA FIND A PIE SHOP IN
PRICKLY PINES!
>> OH.
>> WE WON'T BE LONG!
>> PIE SHOP!
AAH.
AH--
AH-CHOO!
[FARTS]
GRETCHEN.
>> I'VE ALWAYS DREAMT OF A LIFE
ON THE RAILS.
>> UM, EXCUSE ME, SIR,
IS THERE A PIE SHOP IN TOWN?
>> [SNIFFLING]
AH-CHOO!
>> APPLE!
>> PECAN!
>> CHERRY!
>> THERE IT IS!
ONE BRAZILIAN PLANTAIN PERSIMMON
PEAR PIE, PLEASE!
>> HA HA HA.
FOR LOVE SICKNESS, JA?
>> [SNIFFLING]
GRETCHEN.
AH-CHOO!
>> WHAT THE?!
OH, IT'S JUST YOU.
YOU KNOW, CLAM, IT AIN'T TOO
BRIGHT SNEAKING UP ON ALLIGATORS
LIKE THAT.
WHAT DO YOU DOING HERE ANYWAY?
SHOO!
GO ON!
GET LOST!
IF ANYONE FOUND OUT THAT A BEAN
SCOUT WAS TRESPASSING THIS FAR
INTO SQUIRREL SCOUT'S TERRITORY,
THERE'D BE--
WHAT?!
>> SICK.
>> YOU'RE SICK?
>> GRETCHEN SICK.
>> YOU'RE GONNA GET GRETCHEN
SICK IF YOU DON'T BEAT IT!
>> UH, NO!
GRETCHEN SICK.
>> WAIT A MINUTE.
YOU MEAN...
>> CLAM GRETCHEN SICK.
>> WITH ME?
>> AH-CHOO!
>> LOVE SICKNESS!
[STAMMERING]
YOU STAY AWAY FROM ME, CLAM!
>> SICK FOR GRETCHEN!
>> GET AWAY!
CLAMS ARE BAD FOR GRETCHEN.
>> CLAMS WITH GRETCHEN!
>> NO CLAMS!
>> CLAMS!
>> NO CLAMS!
>> CLAMS!
>> NO CLAMS!
>> CLAMS, CLAMS, CLAMS,
CLAMS, CLAMS!
>> HEY, UH, CLAM,
OUR NECKERCHIEFS ARE TANGLED.
>> LOVE KNOT.
>> LOVE KNOT?
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
IT'S JUST A KNOT.
IT CAN BE UNTANGLED.
JUST GOTTA--
>> LOVE KNOT!
>> UNTANGLE!
COME ON, YOU STUPID KNOT!
>> GRETCHEN?!
>> HEY, GRETCHEN!
>> OH, NO!
OH, NO, NO!
COME OUT, STUPID KNOT!
COME ON!
>> GRETCHEN!
>> HEY, GRETCHEN, YOU'RE GONNA
MISS JAI ALAI PRACTICE.
>> SHE NEVER MISSES JAI ALAI.
>> HA, OH.
THERE YOU ARE.
>> HA HA.
HEY, LADIES.
>> WE'VE BEEN CALLING FOR YOU.
>> YEAH.
DIDN'T YOU HEAR US?
>> WE HAVE JAI ALAI TODAY.
DID YOU FORGET?
>> NO.
JUST GETTING READY.
>> UM...
YOU'RE NECKERCHIEF'S ON
BACKWARDS.
>> OH, UH...
YEAH.
IT'S A NEW STYLE.
DO YOU LIKE IT?
>> [SNIFFLING]
AH--
>> UH, UH--
>> AH-CHOO!
GRETCHEN!
>> LOVE SICK BEAN!
AAGH!
>> YOU GOTTA HELP ME, PLEASE!
>> [PANTING]
>> LOVE SICK BEAN ALERT.
LOVE SICK BEAN ALERT.
>> [SCREAMING]
>> LOVE SICK BEAN ALERT.
LOVE SICK BEAN ALERT.
LOVE SICK BEAN HAS INFILTRATED
OUR PERIMETER.
DANGER, DANGER.
LOVE SICK BEAN ALERT.
>> LOVE SICK BEAN ALARM!
>> FROM SQUIRREL SCOUT CAMP!
>> CLAM!
FULL THROTTLE TO SQUIRREL SCOUT
CAMP, ENGINEER RAJ!
>> I THINK I CAN.
I THINK I CAN.
>> HELP, HELP!
SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME!
COME ON, AMBER.
OPEN UP!
TOOTIE, TOOTIE!
YOU GOTTA HELP ME!
[PANTING]
SOMEBODY HELP...
[PANTING]
ME PLEASE.
SOMEONE.
YOU GOTTA HELP ME.
[GROANS]
>> CLAM AND GRETCHEN...
FOREVER.
>> OH, NO.
NO, NO, NO.
CLAM AND GRETCHEN NOT FOREVER.
>> CLAM AND GRETCHEN FOREVER.
>> NOT FOREVER.
>> FOREVER.
>> NOT FOREVER!
>> FOREVER!
>> NOT!
>> FOREVER!
>> NOT!
>> FOREVER!
>> NOT FOREVER!
>> FOREVER!
>> NOT FOREVER!
>> FOREVER!
>> WHOA!
>> UH, UH...
WHERE AM I?
>> CLAM!
>> DUH...
UH-OH!
>> CLAM!
HOLD ON, BUDDY!
WE'VE GOT PIE!
>> LAZLO!
>> CLAM!
>> GRETCHEN!
>> OH, LOOK.
THE LAKE.
>> WELL...
WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT,
MUTANT?!
I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO GET
LOST!
>> GET LOST YOURSELF!
THANKS, LAZLO.
>> [WHISTLING]
>> WELL, HE'S RESTING
COMFORTABLY.
BUT HE'LL BE--
HE'LL BE EXPERIENCING FLU-LIKE
SYMPTOMS FOR A FEW WEEKS.
WHOOPS.
WELL, GOOD-BYE.
>> [GRUNTING]
AH-CHOO!
OH, MISS DOE!
RRR!
>> [GRUNTS]
UH-HUH.
[GRUNTS]
[MOANS]
[CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP]
UH...
[CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL
CAPTIONING INSTITUTE
--www.ncicap.org--]
HA HA HA.
[SCREAMS]
[GIGGLES]
OW!
THAT ONE ACTUALLY HURT A LITTLE.
[TOOT]